I think my co-worker is seeing prostitutes

[Shantjay]

A bit of advice ladies please. After reading some threads on mumsnet, I got a little bit twitchy about my OH and started snooping a bit. He told me that he had paid to see a prostitute years ago and I can't get that out of my head. Once they do that, there's no going back is there? I mean she could have a disease or been forced to do it by a pimp or on drugs. I can't understand why he would do it, but I digress.

I have been reading the threads on a really awful website called It's a site for men who use prostitutes. I found out about it on another thread here. Anyway, they all seem pretty open about things on there and I thought that maybe my OH was using it.

However, there is a poster there who, from what he says, I think maybe a co-worker of mine. If not it is a huge coincidence. He has a really lovely wife who I have become friends with and three beautiful children.

What should I do? Should I suggest that she checks out the site or keep it to myself? I can't be 100% sure but it's pretty likely from all the many clues he had given - even using his first name!

If it was me, I would want to know and make my own enquiries, what do you think?

It's very unlikely to be him surely assuming this is a national website? You could cause all sorts of trouble because someone living 300 miles away has a similar set up & happened to use his first name as a pseudonym.

What makes you think it's him OP beyond the first name?

@pandora you're right, it is driving me nuts. I guess I can't see myself being with a man who thinks it's ok to see a prostitute. He didn't realise how I felt and tbh neither did I until it slipped out when he had a couple of drinks.

@kaykayblue yes he has a very responsible position and most certainly would be sacked and be in the press. I suppose the realisation that it could be him made my blood boil. I thought of his poor wife and kids and the health risks he could be putting them under and thought if it was me I would definitely want to know, even if it turned out not to be him, at least I would know either way.

I can't see me being able to stay with my OH now tbh and think I will leave it with the co-worker. Thanks for all your replies.

OP, you went to that site because you suspect your DP is still seeing prostitutes. His disclosure has rocked your relationship and it is this that you need to address.

Leave your co-worker and his wife and your place of employment out of it. Do not say anything to HR or his wife. It could backfire spectacularly on you. This has nothing to do with them and everything to do with your own relationship. Concentrate on that and stop punter hunting.

X posted.

Good luck OP.