The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Getting Ready For The Golden Sights Of Autumn In Search Of Sobriety.

[Mouseface]

Hello everyone, I'm Mouse :) and this is the Bus I've been on a while now!

It's filled with a variety of drinkers. Those that do, those that don't, and those who are desperate to STOP but hide it, or embrace it and get the help they NEED.

'Help' in whatever form works for them, your friend or you. Be it AA, a Local Community Alcohol Counselling Group, your GP, your family/friends, this thread or even a combination of all of the above!

You have to want to stop drinking more than wanting to breathe.

I know that right now, that may sound like a ridiculous goal.

They got sober, One Day At A Time then came here during the process to chat about it, discuss their feelings, but more than anything else, their experiences HELPED OTHERS TO BELIEVE that they too could get dry.

They might not get dry and stay dry, sometimes they'll be lying about their consumption, fooling themselves as well as others

BUT when the posters do get dry for good, come back and post to help others with their tricks of the trade or just to say 'I did it!!' my heart jumps for joy because that person, poster, Brave Babe has gone through hell and back, lived to tell the tale and now wants to share that with the rest of the Bus to see if one simple trick or technique will put them on the track to recovery, sobriety, to the life that they want to lead :)

There's two saying that have appeared to stick with us -

1. • The Vulnerable Need Our Support, Not Our Judgement
2. • Alcohol Fosters Inertia

We all have our own reasons for starting to drink 'too much', we all have an excuse don't we.... we all have a "but....."

Well, as I say to Nemo (who you will get to hear about ) - goats butt!

And for those of you who want to know a bit more -

HERE IS THE MOST RECENT THREAD

AND THIS IS WHERE IT ALL BEGAN, OVER FOUR YEARS AGO!!!

See you soon x

After 35 days I drank. It was my birthday and we got a bottle of sparkling wine. From the moment we decided to get it my next thought was 'what can we drink when it's finished?' I even recognized the alcoholic thought and choose to ignore it (and knew we had some red wine in the house so there would be something ). So after half a bottle of sparkling white wine, I then drank 2 large (full to the top) glasses of red and more or less passed out in bed.

Felt like shit from the moment I woke up, threw 2 paracetamol down my neck and have spent the entire day feeling grim. Shivery, headache, nausea and I can't wait for the day to end so I can be waking up tomorrow feeling better.

What a pointless exercise, waste of time and money. Actually, not pointless. Yet another reminder that I can't drink moderately, don't really want to at the time. It is not good or healthy to drink in the greedy way that I do, it poisons me quite literally. Back to day 1.

That's funny fairenuff bcoz I've said exactly the same thing - I smoked for yrs - stopped for yrs - started again for a little while and now I don't - but I will if I get to say 75 - I'm 42 now - wow, so only another 33yrs to go!
I feel sorry that you say you 'wouldn't mind going' - hope you don't mind me asking why?
Don't think you'll finish yourself off with skittles - unless you choke on one of course

Beaches today is another Day, it was your BIRTHDAY please please don't beat yourself up. It really does feel like you've poisoned your body doesn't it? I completely understand the 'what can I drink once this is finished' Anyhoo did you have a good Birthday apart from vinegar tits high jacking you. You did have a pretty good reason to drink lovely one and Happy Birthday Babe

You ready to start again? I am I drank a glass of Cava on Tuesday (twas anniversary of my Dad's death, 7 years, and it still feels like yesterday, even though I know it's not) Had half a cider last night in a pub, tasted yuck. Today is Day 1 again

Evening all lovely Babes, back later

Oh beaches sweets. Ride it out and then get right back on it. You know you can kick the WW in the tits. Draw a line under this and move on. You are one of the stars on this here bus. Shine on!
wry loving the camera plan. Do you have an overcoat with a turned up collar and a fedora? Superwry, superspy! phase will talk you through it. She is M to your James Bond!
Distracted chap is lush. I got another email saying " Are you alright? Tell me how I can help you and make it alright."
sigh

Spanna As always peanut, you make me smile , thanks for the birthday wishes and cheering. Sorry to hear it was the anniversary of losing your Dad, such a sadness when they are missed so much . I bet you were the apple of his eye.

And yes, I absolutely AM ready to start again, let's go!!!

Ma not feeling very shiny today but your post made me feel all warm inside, thank you

Love to all the other babes xx

Where are you all tonight?

Am here ma how are you? You're a better person than me, I'd have crumbled at the first email!

I have crumbled emotionally. Fortunately, because of huge job and family restrictions there is little chance I will even ever see him again, let alone get up to any nonesense so I indulge in the comfort of the occasional email. I shouldn't, but it helps.

Beaches I think we need a list you start it Twinkle I know you like a good list

Ma dashing chap is a welcome distraction for you Can just see Wry as James Bond or Batman

Wry me love how are you?

Hope all Babes are A OK x

Grabs handful of skittles and prays for NO result!

Evening all! Busy awd shift again, just got in. Have done the votey thing, what a turn out in my home town, wow!

ma. I'm with soc and joeyon this one. I like distracted chap. He is doing you good.

beaches it was your birthday!!!! Happy Birthday lovely lass! You are another year older, and much wiser. Sorry you're feeling crappy, tomorrow is a new day, it's going to be a better one, you'll see, xx

spanna sorry about your dad, my quine, I bet he would have been right proud of ye, in every sense. What you do, how you are, everything. I'm all right, in a better frame of mind. I reckon I can get through this. I'm on day 3. You'll soon catch me up again spanna, you'll see. Tis but a blip, lass, tis but a blip, xx

Faire how are you sweetheart? I'm not ever so keen on Skittles, I like a Minstrel. Keep going gorgeous, you're fine, xx

Eccles you can do it, we are here with ye, every step of the way, shoulder to shoulder with you. I have my docs on, all the better for hoofing Awd Saggy up the arse when she's tormenting our travellers. Rotten old cow, interfering with folk. You can! You CAN! xx

phrase! That actually sounds doable! Now I just need him to leave the house for a bit. Thank you so much, I am truly grateful, we all have our Achilles heel, technology sure as shit is mine. Most things with buttons leave me stumped. The only buttons on the go when I was of an age to learn stuff quick were on Nick Kamen's 501 jeans. I could have managed them.... xx

Hi, tis me, Mouse

I am in a really, dark, scary and horrid place at the moment. I have so many bad anniversaries and I just can't cope.

We have Nemo going in hospital on Monday for a run of tests under GA which in the past has lead to him being rushed to PICU which some of you know.

Then I have the 9 yr anniversary of losing George, Harry and Charlie at 16+5 weeks.

I spent the day in bed after throwing up all night. My Menopause (almost 40) is well and truly getting hold after talking to my Dad about how my Late Mum was......

I HATE MY LIFE. I'm scared by that. So far I've not turned to drink to numb this shit but by Christ I do not want to feel like this anymore.

HELP.

If I don't respond it's because I can't, not because I don't want to.

Love you Babes. You are all ace.

Wry - sorry for the mix up, but your 52 yr old DH is a waste of skin and oxygen from what I have read, you may know otherwise, but think long and hard about how much you are worth.

xxx

Oh Mouse sorry to hear things are so shit at the moment. You won't remember me but I've been hovering around here for a long time and your immense kindness and bravery has always shone through in your posts. You have such a massive amount to deal with and i don't know how you cope with it all and the pain you're in. Can't say anything to help ease your burdens but just remember that you might feel like life is shit at the moment, but imagine how shit the lives of your family would be without you. Nemo, your DD and DH... their lives are all enriched immeasurably by having you to love them. And the babes here too - what would they do without you?? You are a Mama Bear to Nemo and to the babes of the bus too, so just pick yourself up Mousey one, treat yourself to some lovely cheese and remember how much you are loved!

Oh Mouse sweetheart , I am so sorry that you are feeling so desperate. You have such an extraordinary amount of stuff to deal with and with your constant pain alongside it all, I can't imagine how you cope sometimes. I am not sure what to say aside that we care about you. Hold tight little one.

mouse no words to express my admiration and love for you. We are here to help if we possibly can!

mouse hugs &
Anything we can do to help?

Mouse hang in there darling, bless you. It may seem insurmountable but you will come out the other side. You will.

So much pain and worry you are carrying, I wonder sometimes how you carry on and yet have the heart and strength to support everyone else too.

You are one amazing Mouse you know. I'll be crossing my fingers that all goes well on Monday for wee Nemo, you all deserve a slice of happy.

The menopause won't be helping either sweetheart, floods of roller coaster emotions washing away your defences. Aww lass, get through today as best you can and know that we are here, willing you on. Xx

P.S your wee mix up made me hoot. It's true. I got me a 'Kevin'. Harry Enfield has competition!

beaches Right- one of the reasons I stopped going to my meetings is the v.unreasonable attitude aa has to people who drink after a period of sobriety (call it a lapse or whatever you like). Actually,anyone who makes it through 35 days of sobriety has done an amazing thing,given their body a real break from the evils of booze

The idea that we only have one chance and that one trip ruins everything,is bollocks I mean contradicts modern studies into any form of quitting. Sorry,that isn't very clear but I mean that long term success,irrespective of whether it's slimming,quitting the fags,running the marathon involve picking yourself up and carrying on WHEN you are ready to do so.

This quitting business is a journey not a short sprint to sainthood.

mouse big, enormous hug. (and kisses and smooches if you'll have them). I'm sorry there isn't stuff we can do in real tangible life.

guggs I so agree with you. If giving up was easy we'd all nail it the first time. And there would be no bus or AA meetings or anything. Nothing worth having seems to come easily in life. Any day sober is good so beaches 35 days is incredible. Who cares about a slip up. Anyway, it was your birthday. Happy Birthday xx

My new problem is salted caramel ice cream. Sigh. Fuck it's good ice cream.

An 'aye' from me guggs, if it was a piece of piss we wouldn't be here and the little triumphs wouldn't mean a thing.

soc I love salted caramel icecream!

Does anyone else feel like it's a bit anti-climaxy in Scotland today? I was expecting banners oer bridges etc, but it's all very quiet...

Gah! that came across wrong. Ds demanding attention. I meant that we need lots of chances to just keep on going and not give up when we have slips.

Think it might be best if i give up on thsi one now!

Or Wot wry and soc said.

Think i need coffee this am.

MrsM I'm ok thanks, things are great for me but it's just that I think people who have passed away have gone wherever they go and are pain free. It's those that are left behind that suffer so much through loving and missing them

Health is a very, very good reason to quit/cut back the drinking. I want to see my children grow up. I want to help and guide them into adulthood. But then I want to be there for them when they need a friendly ear or a shoulder to cry on. And I want to see their own children, if they have them, and watch them grow too. So the longer I can stay healthy, the better.

Mouse well done for coming to the bus, we are here for you. No wonder you feel so awful, you are ill. You need to rest if you can and try to tackle one thing at a time. Easier said than done I know x

Let it all out here, tell us how you feel if it helps. Have you seen the gp about the menopause, anything they can do? I hear there are lots of herbal remedies for different symptoms but not sure what at the moment. Can you take yourself off to bed for a rest and do a bit of googling?