The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Getting Ready For The Golden Sights Of Autumn In Search Of Sobriety.

[Mouseface]

Hello everyone, I'm Mouse :) and this is the Bus I've been on a while now!

It's filled with a variety of drinkers. Those that do, those that don't, and those who are desperate to STOP but hide it, or embrace it and get the help they NEED.

'Help' in whatever form works for them, your friend or you. Be it AA, a Local Community Alcohol Counselling Group, your GP, your family/friends, this thread or even a combination of all of the above!

You have to want to stop drinking more than wanting to breathe.

I know that right now, that may sound like a ridiculous goal.

They got sober, One Day At A Time then came here during the process to chat about it, discuss their feelings, but more than anything else, their experiences HELPED OTHERS TO BELIEVE that they too could get dry.

They might not get dry and stay dry, sometimes they'll be lying about their consumption, fooling themselves as well as others

BUT when the posters do get dry for good, come back and post to help others with their tricks of the trade or just to say 'I did it!!' my heart jumps for joy because that person, poster, Brave Babe has gone through hell and back, lived to tell the tale and now wants to share that with the rest of the Bus to see if one simple trick or technique will put them on the track to recovery, sobriety, to the life that they want to lead :)

There's two saying that have appeared to stick with us -

1. • The Vulnerable Need Our Support, Not Our Judgement
2. • Alcohol Fosters Inertia

We all have our own reasons for starting to drink 'too much', we all have an excuse don't we.... we all have a "but....."

Well, as I say to Nemo (who you will get to hear about ) - goats butt!

And for those of you who want to know a bit more -

HERE IS THE MOST RECENT THREAD

AND THIS IS WHERE IT ALL BEGAN, OVER FOUR YEARS AGO!!!

See you soon x

morning all, day 1 again

wry what a nasty cruel man-boy he is. Every time you mention him, the stories get worse. I like beaches idea of just stealing the camera and giving it to a tech. Ugh he makes me skin crawl.

eccles Day 1 again here too. I've drunk 4 days out of the last 5, I need to stop right now.

Hope you feel better soon Isinde.

Wry you mentioned a while back that when you were really hacked off with him and distant, the wanker suddenly got all attentive and nice again... If you want the photos, I think you should capitalise on how horrible he was to your neighbour. Be distant and cool, and if he asks why, tell him that you just don't feel the same way about him after his behaviour. When he starts to try and ingratiate himself again, say that you can't trust his behaviour any more... after all, he's promised to give you those photographs for however long and hasn't kept his word. You think it's better if you cool things/end it now. Then just disengage, don't return calls, be too busy to see him etc. I bet you'll have the photos within a week or two. You need to be determined, calculated and patient!

Once you've got the photos, dump him like a hot potato - he's a wankbadger of the highest order!

Yeah what crabby said, I'm gonna hunt him down and he'll get a Glasgow kiss fae me... My blood is boiling....

Hope you feel better inside hugs for you.

Can't NC in this new format so I'll check in later. Xx

I like your style crabby! I definitely think the calm, calculated tactics will have a good chance of working on WB. Good Luck Wry, we are all rooting for you.

Hope you feel better quickly isinde . I assume you must have got through your marathon workshops so perhaps you could take it a bit easier for the rest of the day

Waves to baby, joey, eccles and all babes lurking.

you've been working silly hours again, haven't you? My DH has also got a bad cold - I kicked him out of bed last night to sleep in the spare room (full of sympathy until he wakes me with his hacking cough, not to mention dripping sweat all over the sheets - ugh) Just praying he doesn't give it to me or the kids!

isinde DH asks pathetically for 'thin soup' when he's ill. At first I didn't know what this meant, so tried him on tomato, chicken noodle etc.

"No, thin soup! THIN soup!!" he would wheeze, struggling manfully to get the words out before he succumbed to Q-fever or ebola or something. So I finally found out it meant beef consomme.

Perhaps you could tell DW you crave thin soup when you're ill? Trumps veganism.

I'm not belittling vegans! (some of my best friends... etc) just that poorly people deserve nice stuff and treats and whatever they crave, Opal Fruits or consomme or hot chocolate with sprinkles

Thank you for the lovely welcome bus-babes!

I have a pile of work to do, dinner to cook, house a shambles, and I want to run away from it all and hide my worries in a glass of deep red wine. I won't (today) but I so much want to.

Tomorrow I start yoga classes, and I'm hoping that will help with anxiety-killing, handling own emotions and all the other stuff that piles up in my brains.

love
got to post and run - love you all ya bus full of loonies!
Period threatening so crampy and crabbit but MUST go out for a jog tonight.
sister up from London - we need to talk about kevindad! No shit, Sherlock!

Hi all, plus special waves to emo, chick and truly!

Just a quick check-in, I'm way behind on posts after being away! I had a lovely few days' walking with my friend, and we've agreed to meet up again in October to do a different National Trail. I'm really looking forward to it.

I'm still faithfully AF, thought this time round I am having cravings, which I don't recall on previous pregnancies (bar the time I couldn't drink at my own work leaving do, which did prompt a giant sulk ). There's no way I'll succumb, but I'm surprised. I suppose the last times I felt more certain that This Was It and there was loads to look forward to, whereas nowadays that's tempered with a certain amount of caution.

At the moment I'm just absolutely knackered all the time - it's like that feeling when you have to get up for a plane at 4am, except it kicks in from about 2pm onwards . I'm not complaining though - all symptoms are good symptoms!

Because I'm under consultant care for repeated MC, I get an early scan - booked in for 3 weeks' time. I hope so, so much that it'll be good news.

Wry, I am quite techy. If you can ascertain the make of the camera and spend a little time chatting to me about that and the setup on your laptop, I'm pretty sure I can help you get the photos off and stored. It's quite simple. We have a fairly fancy digi camera and it takes me about 3 minutes to copy off photos onto my laptop, so it's something you could do swiftly if you had access to the camera for any time. It is also different to the process for deleting photos, so you wouldn't risk losing them. I'm sorry about the way he's behaving, it sounds bloody awful. If you want a hand, just let me know.

Love to all

Another day down! I didn't succumb, but I didn't do very much. Twin2 spent a solid hour screaming due to the unfairness of waking from a nap (I could see his point, frankly). Lovely husband did their dinner and made pizza for himself - I wasn't very hungry, so had soup and crackers with cheese, while I caught up on work stuff.

After the high of the first couple of weeks AF, I'm suddenly finding myself in a slump of anxiety and sadness - definite wine-triggers for me, and will get worse at the weekend. I suspect hormones may be behind at least some of my low mood. I hope it gets better.

I just have to keep reminding myself that alcohol will only make it worse!

Indethickofit Thank you for your guerrilla advice! I just worry that I'll leave everything lapse too much and then make my mood worse! Somedays surviving is enough though, I think!
Hope your littles had a good day at school - sorry to hear the novelty is wearing off though :D

Hi babes, em been reading your posts and I just wanted to say I think your doing brilliantly, I relate very much to your comments, I used wine to self medicate anxiety and it's hard to find new ways to process the sheer frustrations of life, especially if your a nervous person and I am very much so, never used to be but the legacy of PND has made me so. Also the house being a mess, I know it's not the be all and end all but your comment about the stuff piling up in your brain really struck a chord and when my house gets chaotic so does my head but right now pick your battles and we can deal with the house stuff later. It's also true the AF honeymoon does diminish a little but I've done weeks before and went back and it's so so not worth it, having to repeat the withdrawal, the sweats, the anxiety, the guilt, you just keep doing what your doing cos your fab and brave. Xxx

phrase thinking of you babe, you take care of yourself, it's gonna be fine xxx

venus I wanted to say your post about being "mediocre" was so poignant, thank you for your beautiful and profound honesty, it really inspired me to be the best version of myself and I continue to try with every passing day.

I was thinking today of sad, lonely and desparate I felt to post on here initially, I don't used MN in any other sense, but if I hadn't felt that way I wouldn't have found you all so for all my problems past and present I'm so glad to have found you all.

Anyway hugs to everyone, soppy git that I am xxx

Had a row with DH (he was being an arse - although to be fair he is only just surviving on lemsip and thin soup, bless) thank god I didn't have any wine around!

I would have regretted guzzling a bottle, as we both said sorry 2 hours later - and now I am soberly triumphant (because I was in the right really, I only accepted his apology because he was ill ) plus he has taken to the spare room again, so me and the dog can snore in peace.

Hi can I jump on board. was going to name change but Cba .
I was using wine I think to self medicate anxiety and have gone through the biggest changes in my life over the last few months , all good . This week is a new beginning and I want to be a good mum above everything and a less anxious me .
I never thought of alcohol adding to anxiety until I read this thread . Depression I can understand but if reducing my wine helps reduce my anxiety even better !
I have got to the stage where I drink most nights soon as I walk through the door. I don't drink lots but over the rec amount . prob half a bottle sometimes more .
I haven't indulged since Sunday so day 3 here and was imagining feeling bloody awful but feel great . I think it's more of a habit with me which I need to break before it becomes more .
Drinking lots of tea and have been amazed at how much more time I seem to have in the evening to do things I enjoy like read longer stories to dc and I even baked cookies after a 12 hours work shift yesterday !
I really want a healthier relationship with alcohol and think to achieve this I need to refrain entirely for a good stint of ??? , or at least not drink at all in the week so it becomes the normal .
All tips v welcome and thread is fab x

Hi blondie welcome aboard our lovely bus, sounds like your off to a great start. It's often hard to remember if we start drinking cos we're anxious or are anxious cos we're drinking but there's no doubt it gets worse with wine in the long run. I think for now you should just contemplate ODAAT, your doing brilliantly and seem to be reaping the benefits already and your so right, how much more time to enjoy in the evening, last night I had a magnesium bath and a face pack then watched a movie. On a wine night it's losing patience with the kids during story time, can't be bothered having a bath and never remember the movie end, everything in my life is more difficult for the sake of that first glass of "warmth". I've tried and failed a hundred times so I've learned as most of us have the hard way, buy a new book, a new perfume, a new lippy, try a new hobby, all of these will give you so much more pleasure that the poison we chose to sicken ourself with.... Good luck lovely and keep posting, lots of fabby dabby do babes on here xxx

joey hope alls well on the home front, man flu is so much worse than ours!!!!xx

Again can't read back on this strange new format but sending heartfelt hugs to one and all, back to day 3 and actually relieved to be feeling a bit normal again.xxx

Welcome Blondie I absolutely agree there is a link between anxiety and alcohol. For me, I worry about drinking - how much, when, where. If I'm 'allowed' to drink at the weekend, I start thinking about it on Wednesday.

I obsess over where I can buy my mini-bottles. If we're sharing a bottle, worry about who's having more than their share. If I've had too much, worry about hiding the evidence. Trying to remember if I said or did anything stupid.

It is exhausting

Your so right joey it's so exhausting xxx

checking in. Have massively fucked up at work. Entirely my fault. lovely boss quietly disappointed...

Oh ma, on top of everything else you've been facing, this must feel hard.

Of course in reality we all fuck up from time to time, especially if we're stressed, but knowing that doesn't help. Have a big sob to yourself, work out if there's anything that you can do to repair the damage, and don't panic. Try not to run away, or chuck in your job (even if you feel like you never want to face anyone again).

Speak to your lovely boss. He will understand that you are upset and disappointed too. Let him know how stressed you are by the ongoing work uncertainty, let him know about your dad's deterioration and how that is affecting you. And see if together you can do anything about it.