Dating thread 76

[LoisPuddingLane]

As we were saying...

[akaWisey]

54 divorced 3.5 years. there were OW from when ex husband realised he didn't love me until the end of the marriage (about 6 years i think) together 20 years.

OD has been interesting. Surreal. I look about 10 years younger (by genetic gift) and I'm independent, self supporting and sociable. I think OD isn't there to get people together. I think it exists to keep people apart.

[Bigbird01]

It's ok Jarlin this thread does move pretty fast at times!

We met (the coffee I mentioned above). He was nice, we chatted for a couple of hours, but no sparks or connection at all. Left it a couple of days then sent him a message saying I'd had a nice time etc, but guessing there was no connection. He replied with a very nice note saying he'd enjoyed himself, but no - no connection for him either. It was good to get the first first date out the way though and it wasn't a bad experience.

[ChickOnaMission]

I'm 35, separated about a year ago after 10 year marriage. Horrible Horrible break up but have been (reasonably) amicable recently. 2 young DC who normally stay with my ex nights 2-3 a week but he is currently away for the summer, conveniently on holiday when the world cup is on...

Had a ONS soon after split from match which was fun and exciting but a bit unfullfilling after. Then met a really lovely guy on pof which was a FWB type thing, lasted about 6 months but that finished 2 weeks ago. Miss him terribly and still have (stupid I know) hopes we can re-kindle... Will find out in a few weeks when we meet up again for catch up.

Definitely can't face going back to OLD.

And also totally agree about finding this thread, has been wonderful to talk to others who understand, rather than my mates who are all happy and sorted and loved up... Also reading everyone elses stories and knowing we're all the same really! It's not just me who checks my phone a hundred times a day and jumps when I get a text!

[dippinmytoe]

I'm 37 , separated just under a year , awaiting decree absolute any day now :-) 2 dd's 3 & 5. Met my exh online 7 yrs ago, got married and two kids !! I've been od for a few months on and off but no success, I am chatting to a few and got a date tomorrow night... so who knows. I love following this thread, hearing everyone's stories makes me feel very normal about all my worries of relationships.

[jesy]

Hi
An update as such been awake for a week
But still in contact with mr it but no chance of getting back together

Ended up drunk texting a guy I dated a few years back asked him out and he said no I got arsey. Saying I was good enough for u to get a hand job the other day lol
We have made up since

Back on line dating again not sure it's best idea but oh well chatting to a couple of men but both live a bit far away so not sure but it passes the time.
It doesn't help I still really like mr it
On a rubbish note my so called mates have decided I'm not good enough for them now

Sorry it's no good news

[neiljames77]

Jesy - you'll never move on until you totally block this bloke from your life and forget about him. Your friends probably feel the same. It won't be because you're not good enough for them, they'll just be getting frustrated on your behalf.

[liam2014]

Anyone from round the Surrey/Sussex area?

[TalisaMaegyr]

You know this isn't a thread to actually get a date don't you liam....

[liam2014]

Well it should be... I'm going to start a new trend :)

[ChickOnaMission]

oh jesy I totally agree with Neil, do try to go no contact with him, it will definitely help you. Seeing him and texting him isn't giving you a chance to get over him. It's so hard I know especially if you think your mates are giving you a hard time. But going to him for comfort won't help. OLD might keep you occupied, but also it might be good to give guys a break for a while? Easier said than done I know..

Bit hypocritial I know seeing as I admitted up thread I'd like to rekindle the relationship that just ended... it is SO hard to just forget about someone you really liked I know... but do try!

[ChickOnaMission]

talisa I was thinking it'd be good to go out hunting for dates with women from this thread. I just need a girlfriend to go out with on the pull!

All my friends are married...

[ChickOnaMission]

liam you'd probably have more luck on pof!

[avianaz]

Sort of in the same boat jesy, can't move on, still in contact with ex.

Who btw found out about my PoF account yesterday! He's angry then sad and advising me to move on, then being really nice and wants to meet up this weekend.

Sigh :( And we had cam sex again this morning, we were getting on so fantastically.

I'm having a bad day, I can live without him, I can't live with thinking of him doing all he things we did with someone else. He made his entire family and friends hate me and I worry that when he finds someone else THEN he will wise up and she'll be included in everything. I'll be that bitch ex girlfriend. :( With everything we've been through suddenly invalid for him. :( :( :(

[avianaz]

Oh! Role call...
I'm 21
Recently broke up with boyfriend of a few years... but involved much longer.
It was very intense, loads of unfortunate things happened, abortion, miscarriage, abandonment just after these awful things :'(
Wanting to just have fun and get over him.

[Blossomflowers]

Well sounds like you have all been busy. Well remember I said that was talking with really nice chap but he did not want to commit to a date with me until he had met this lady he already arranged to meet ( very new to internet dating and quite sweet) well things went ok but he did not feel the spark so we are now meeting on Wend night. Stupidly saw 3 missed calls from him over the weekend, maybe he thinks I am playing hard to get. Rang this morning for a nice chat. Not getting my hopes up yet though. XP will go mental if he finds out.

[avianaz]

Blossom - (yn)!!
I remember your post
It's pretty amazing how exes think they have a right to be angry at you moving on, especially when they were cunts!

[ChickOnaMission]

blossom that's great! :-) He was the honourable one who didn't want to mess anyone around wasn't he? Yay! Fingers crossed for wednesday.

avianaz oh wow it sound like you've really been through it, but you definitely have youth on your side!! Oh how wonderful to have mates to go out with and your whole life ahead of you :-) Having lots of fun will definitely help you get over him.

[ChickOnaMission]

avianaz thats so true also about the exes, suddenly they realise how good they had it once they know they can't have you anymore.

I had a whole load of head fuckery from my ex once we finally split. He decided he was going to stop smoking pot, gambling, messing around with other women online and get down the gym! Thing is, once I'd tasted life without him there's no WAY I'd go back there!

[jesy]

I'm sat in my car crying as I just drove past a place that reminded me of mr it
I just unhappy at the moment can't wait till it's five so I can go home.
My mates don't want to know as I'm not in there circle anymore,

[avianaz]

chick I feel like I have youth and confidence - but nothing else! Lots of acquaintances but no close friends. Shite relationship with family. Inability to get a job. I am very very grateful for anything I do have though which includes access to this forum and the people in it. :)
They're really something else aren't they?? I hope I get to the stage where I can say that!

jesy
:( I am feeling your pain right now. With the stupid things reminding you, and not being in your circle of friends anymore. My close friends were actually awful and nasty behind my back for years unbeknownst to me.
Sometimes you do get awfully sad, not helped by pms or not getting sleep or just one of those days - but it's always temporary, and imagine we were stuck to unloyal friends or asshole for ever? We'd never get a chance to see what else is out there, surround ourselves with better people. x

[avianaz]

I feel guilty because my ex is fucking me around - but talking to a guy that I actually like! I don't like his pictures or anything, not in that sort of way, but I actually enjoy reading his replies.
It's just nice!

[splishsplosh]

Hi, can I join back in again - long time lurker, occasional poster.
I got bored of OD for a while, but am dabbling in it again -chatting to 1 guy - photo doesn't really do it for me, but he is very funny, and we have a possible date set up.

Oh and 43, 2 children 5 & 8, in the SE

[jesy]

Avianze
Hope I spelt that ok

I have been asked out three times Sunday but heart not in it,
Sounds daft but all I want to do today is be home with my dog, I only started to date in 2011 one major relationship a fling , mr it , the fling I still have a space in my heart always will he was perfect but sadly no longer in touch , major relationship officially broke heart for 2nd time at weekend by lying to me it made me think how often did he lie before lol

[avianaz]

splish hey :) I wonder does anyones photos do "it" for anyone? I can't imagine what someone I would like the look of would look like - I need to get to know them first!

jesy Look at you. :P I know what you mean, I was asked out too and I cba really. Would rather sit in, clean, do every day things that comfort me. I feel bad because I gave the impression I'd be up for it sometime.
Funny you say about lies - I've found that when you find out about lies you've usually only scratched the surface. :/ D was a pathological liar and it never, ever ended. It still goes on now! Ex friends the same.
I'm thinking we either need more time - or while we're getting the time we should go on these dates and just enjoy ourselves, no expectations nothing serious, just niceness! :)