Total red flag and I know it

[Fairyloo]

Single and feel so alone. My self esteem has been on the floor for years. I have no respect for self and desperately want a relationship.

Met someone and he is a dick and I know it but can't stop myself seeing him.

Some examples are:

He is single but literally only invites me round for an hour for sex. He literally kicks me out after.

The disregard he has for women describes someone 'as the fat one'

He wants me to have a threesome and literally won't stop going on about it. Like I'm never enough.

He gets very rough during sex. The other day I said something and he mock slapped me and said font ever fucking do that again.

Then last night I made a joke and he text me saying

Don't fucking talk to me again! I fucking mean it!!!

Then when I said it was a joke he text back saying,

I know it was a joke but as punishment you can't speak to me all night

Also he has said he has taped me begging for it (he says) and if I end it he will put it on Facebook

I know I know I know he is an absolute knob but I love the attention and the sex is absolutely fantastic.

I know I'm better then that. I know I deserve a better relationship but in scared that this is all I'll get,

I've known him for a couple of years we do a joint activity in which he is highly regarded in and there was never any evidence of this atall.

Please help me to see the truth in the relationship

its fairly sexist actually, but it helped me work out what I would put up with and that it was ok to just walk away when someone turns out to be not what you need.

Just read this thread again and feel so sad at the women I've become why would I accept that?

Well no more thanks mumsnet.

Standing strong and accountable (but quivering inside)

Just read this thread again and feel so sad at the women I've become why would I accept that?

Well no more thanks mumsnet.

Standing strong and accountable (but quivering inside)

Can I suggest you seek a therapist to talk to and help you address the things that are making you feel so worthless that you got into this relationship?

OP, you have been very brave in getting this nasty, foul piece of work out of your life.
Please please don't even think about dating though, until you have had counselling, established your boundaries and recovered/found your self esteem. You are way too vulnerable to date at the moment (I know, I've been there).

Thanks everyone

This thread has totally helped

Well done fairy lots of us have been there too sadly, hence the outrage! Onwards and upwards!