Why do some men want to sleep around?

[Tiredstilltired]

Why do some men want sex with lots of different women? I've heard countless friends say that men they meet on internet dating just want to shag around.
What is the appeal of lying about what you want simply to get a quick shag and then move onto the next. Why is that appealing? Surely sex gets better the more you have it with the same person?
What is the appeal in shagging lots of women once?

Why do people go on ID sites with the intention of meeting people just for sex?
Men-Because they're Bastards
Women - To fill a painful and aching gap in their life, (please no entendre intended!) created by their currently useless man

Why do people lie about their true intentions?
Men - Because they are Bastards
Women - Because this male dominated society has installed norms that make it impossible for them to be upfront about their desires without being labelled a slut.

Why do people need the ego boost they get from ONS?
Men - Because they are Bastards.
Women - Because it validates their empowerment.

But why do they keep repeating this behaviour.
Men - Because they really are Bastards!
Women - Because they keep reading sex threads on Mumsnet and feel obliged to try a trip to Centrparcs!

Hopefully this attempt at a humorous reply will highlight the odd premise of the original post!

Well it made me laugh Andy!

Thanks for posting.

Haha....

I don't see men attractive enough to sleep with every week! Once a year perhaps.

Most of the men I find attractive are married, successful loving dh and fathers. Just like my own dh
I wouldn't want to shag all of them though.
Serial shaggers are a huge turn off. I like to be made to feel special and being shag number 53 this year wget me going.

Unless you are your partner's first and last experience which is extremely unlikely, you are in his list of shags whether you like it or not.

Actually my dh and I are each other's only shags. Met at 17.
Glad we did.

Wow - as in, I tried a piece of cheese once, liked that one and decided I will never ever try any other type or variety of cheese in spite of seeing other people eating many different types of cheese.

In fact, I will tell the other people that my view is that they are lacking self respect by trying different types of cheese instead of staying true to the first cheese. Even although I've never tried any other cheese, I will state that I prefer it to all other types.

Seems perfectly logical to me :)

Fear of commitment? Maybe these men are too afraid to allow anyone to actually get to know them properly and need to hide their vulnerable side.

Tired; you basically said that women having recreational sex are in denial and not really enjoying it. They're "looking for affection"- etc. Then you are defensive saying your opinion is just that and you shouldn't be judged for it/people shouldn't be judged for it. But that is exactly what you are doing.

I am a young woman who enjoys "recreational" sex. No hidden agenda. I don't need "affection", etc. I have friends, family and a pet who give me all the love I nerf. i've used OLD for sex and met plenty of other women and men in similiar situations to me. Busy lives, no interest in a relationship (open or monogamous) but who are not sexually dead inside. Masturbation isn't the same as sex, so I try to find some good sex now and again. I would rather go without than have in out sex with a weirdo but if someone is funny and good looking and wants what I want, I shan't be saying no.

Personally I wouldn't tell someone how many people I'd slept with. Not if they asked explicitly anyway. That, to me, would be a red flag. If I have a relationship I will committed to it and my previous sexual relationships will be irrelevant. Just as theirs will.

There isn't a right or wrong way to feel about sex. Most people I know feel like you do. They aren't in denial, that's how they feel. But I would be quite hurt if they insinuated in person to me that my feelings weren't the real ones. They were right, I was wrong, and one day I'd be enlightened. I would concede I am perhaps selfish, though, because this life suits me best. But I'd be pretty stupid to be unhappy when my happiness is completely harmless.

Need not nerf..whoops

You sound like you are trying to convince yourself that having one sexual partner for your entire life is the right thing to do, that it would be rubbish with others, grim, not nice and you would not be special.

Fine- good call if that's how you feel. Not quite sure why you are interested in why others feel differently if you have so clearly taken the right path and your husband has too.

I remember using IRC many years ago when I was student, I used to see so many bored housewives from the US coming online and chatting to people. Some would even flirt ! I just know that, whenever a person is not satisfied with their own lives, they would try and "get it back" or they think they can get it from another form, rather than to deal with things the right way. What individuals may not stop to think about is that each encounter will change them as a person and it can indeed become a habit. I have to say that, I did the same too. I do not mean that I slept around with people, but I picked up bad habits, or I did things and met people and kept in touch when I really did not want to or I could do.

When I have started to streamline my life and really filter out people, or things, or encounters and spend more time on the things which nourish me as a person, I felt more connected as a person and more grounded. Heck, I even ditched the GF who labelled me as a doormat many years ago. I think we all want quality people, and quality of life, and everyone is entitled to this. When I see people who do this, I just realise that they are no longer in control, but it acting almost like an addict and perpetuating continuing a bad habit. I used to be weary of such people, but I think I can spot these people now.