He's always been open about being bisexual but has only ever been with women.
He cheated on me 3 years ago when I was 17 weeks pregnant and 4 weeks before our wedding day and I know I should have left then but I wasn't strong enough.
Today he took his phone in the bathroom to play music while he showered and left it playing once finished so I went to turn it off, swiped the screen and some app called 'grindr' came up. I saw he'd set up a profile and sent pictures to men and one said about meeting Sunday (tomorrow).
So I asked him about it. I'm quite open minded and don't mince my words or bullshit so I asked him about it. What's this app? Why is it on your phone? Why are you sending nude photos to people?
He denied it all and said he didn't know what I was talking about, rolled his eyes and told me I shouldn't look at his phone.
I pushed him and pushed him until he snapped at me and told me that yes he'd been on the app. Sent photos. Arranged to meet. And that last Sunday while I took our 2 year old to his great nans for dinner, he went 'on the spur of the moment' and had full on sex with a stranger he'd been talking to. They did everything you could imagine from what he has told me.
I vomited through shock and told him to get away from me and have kind of locked myself away upstairs. Our son is downstairs with him playing like normal and he keeps texting my phone telling me he's sorry and will make it right.
There's no way that can happen is there?? It'll never be right again. 
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Relationships
My DP cheated with a man..
threeblueducks · 22/03/2014 17:12
She thought he'd told me that he thought he may be bisexual and I flipped my lid and threw him out. Which would have been a hideous thing for me to do.
She's up to speed now. She asked him what 'Grindr' was and I've since had an apology from her but she thinks that we're 'the real deal' and I should given him another chance as he was clearly confused and maybe he wasn't getting all he needed at home.
I'm actually glad I hadn't had sex with him in the last week as I would still be scrubbing my skin raw to get the lying bastard off me. First and only time I've been thankful for my period 
Well after a long day everything seems to have calmed down. I went to close the curtains at about 8pm and the bag of his stuff had gone, meaning somebody had taken it without any fuss..
I've had a couple of texts start to filter through saying people are sorry to hear we've split, is there anything we can do to mend things etc etc, so I can only assume that the current version of events that is out in the open isn't entirely honest, but not entirely painting me as heartless.
DS asked earlier why daddy wasn't giving him his bath tonight- that was always their thing, so he's a little confused, but doesn't really seem overly bothered, with the distraction of Rio on TV and a glass of warm milk while we snuggled on the sofa.
I'm off to the walk in clinic tomorrow to see if I can get booked in for testing, and I suppose I'm going to have to speak to him at some point in the next day or two to arrange time with our son, and to arrange for things to be moved from the house. 7 years means we have a lot of things that are either jointly bought, or things he's bought, so they'll need a home. We're also booked to go on our first holiday as a 3 in June, so I need to crack on and get that cancelled before the cancellation period runs out and we lose the money.
This is what happens when something like this happens- I become very practical and am able to bottle my emotions quite well... at 17 weeks pregnant and 4 weeks prior to our wedding 3 years ago I was able to cancel everything in less than 3 hours, and get most of our deposits back before realising the scale of what had just happened. So I know it will hit me, but at least if things are done and I have a plan and people around it'll seem less of a blow.
The one thing I can guarantee is that there will be no going back this time.
I am fully preparing myself for all kinds of accusations, but my conscience is clear. I'm aware there will be people who believe he was driven to cheat, that I forced his hand, that I did it first and so on and so forth, but if I can leave a man after 7 years, I'm sure I can leave any acquaintances that believe he is whiter than white.
Now the real question... 
or 
??
You sound great, OP, and I hope you never take him back. You are worth a thousand of him.
Well done you. So sad to hear you are in this boat.
Good luck with the STI clinic. Sorry, but I would suggest this is most likely the only time he got caught. Tell them exactly what your DP did, and that it was with a man. Ask to be tested for everything under the sun.
No going back now you will get lonely and he will try to wind you back in, but he will do it again, and it will only be a matter of time before the temptation of bareback becomes too much. He has already risked everything for m2m sex his relationship with you and his chance to raise his son in an intact family. Neither has meant enough to him to resist temptation.
'Twill definitely hit you though 
.
Stay strong. You will encounter lots of people who think a relationship with a man who is gay or bi means lots of in depth conversations about furniture arranging or paint colours with a sort of female friend who could also paint your toenails really well for you and pick out fantastic outfits for you to wear. Take a deep breath before laying into them. It makes mincemeat out of you emotionally to try to talk to people who don't understand that cheating is cheating, and that living with someone you can never trust leaves you a shadow of your former self.
I agree there is no confusion about it -- you either have integrity or you don't.
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You are doing so well.
This 'friend' needs to remember that he has cheated before and that he has only admitted to the things he has actually being caught out for.
Who knows how often he has actually cheated.
Keep strong xx
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