The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Wading Through Winter Blues Without The Booze!

[Mouseface]

I'm Mouse, nice to meet YOU.

This is a thread for those who want to give up drink completely, or are maybe thinking about doing controlled drinking, or cutting down slowly, it's all up to you. And of course all addictions, so if you are taking drugs of any kind, prescription or otherwise, you're very welcome here too!

You know your limits, you know what is required, it's all in YOUR hands.

Whatever your goal, you'll find unconditional support here. Always. :)

There will be talk of drinking quite often and those who fall off the Bus will post about it, so if that is going to jeopardise your chances of complete sobriety, then maybe the DRY threads would suit you better, as they are complete abstainers, but EVERYONE IS WELCOME HERE :)

There are two sayings that we rather like here -

1. • The Vulnerable Need Our Support, Not Our Judgement
2. • Alcohol Fosters Inertia

For those of you who'd like some history, here is the very first thread and the reason that we're all here now. FIRST EVER THREAD

And the most recent so you can work your way back through time IS JUST HERE

The Bus may be 'mythical', but the support is real, it is honest and it will help you to achieve what it is that YOU seek, as long as you are honest with us, but mostly, YOURSELF

Mouse xxx

Hi little and a very warm welcome, I was nodding my head emphatically at your words, everything associated with pleasure is in my mind attached alcohol, for as long as I can remember wine was always a reward, at work do's, a nice family meal, on holiday, I worked in sales and booze and business are one in the same. I also know I miss the excitement of my sales career so boredom and frustration at being a SAHM have left a big space. None of this is an excuse but it helps me try to understand. I spend far too long thinking about wine and often dodge nights out to avoid drinking and behaving stupidly to then let friends down and stay at home to get drunk anyway!!! I'm am 42, have a nice home, 2 healthy kids, wonderful parents and I'm supposed to be quite smart but wine is my Achilles heel... The last thing is that every single story I have ever read about giving up wine completely is always a happy one, a relieved one and a hopeful one, and I want to feel those things and not all this crap... Sorry everyone thinking aloud... Xxx

Hey inside your posts always calm me, you are so clever and smart and sassy and successful, the fact you understand and have had the same thoughts and emotions as me makes me feel I'm not just weak and stupid because you are neither of these things and so will struggle on together. On a medical level, I have never thought too much about the damage I may have done, always presuming I would have time to turn it around but now at 42 I need to be around for my girls, as an older mum second time round (dd2 is only 3) I should be doing everything possible to stay in this earth for as long as I can.. This may sound vain but it's hard from going from a slightly glamourous, high octane sales life to the wrong side of 42, slightly overweight, invisible and downtrodden... I need to stop feeling sorry for myself and find other better, healthier ways to get "the buzz". I'm so glad I have you all with me (I'm actually crying here) bloody hormental. Xx

isinde you're a fab friend.

You all are xxx

sidecar, Ive done all of those.
Including drinking on a train with children in tow because it is "allowed" - expected even (I only travel for pleasure, not business).
I have paid for dd to get taxis home rather than stay sober to drive her at 11pm.
Shared a bottle of wine at the bf's house then got the cab to stop at the shop (so leave early enough as well) to get another one because lets face it, half isnt enough.
Drunk as much as possible at parents house over dinner so I can get it all in for "free" then pick a bottle up on the way home anyway.
As long as Im in bed by X time, it doesnt matter if I have an extra glass...

Could go on.....

Its a funny one. There is 1.5 bottles of wine in the house. I wont drink tonight because I have promised myself and though Ive done that before, Ive never "said" it out loud like this, so I must must must.
However, were I to drink tonight, I would have gone out and bought another so bf wouldnt know Id had anything when he comes round tomorrow. Thats not right is it?

He is a sweetie, we are both very fit and he has a strict no boozing (or carbs arrrrrrrgh) in the week policy which he easily sticks to because its not something he would think of. Of course I will try and find an excuse once a week to drink, rough day, kids been shits, good news - ANYTHING and he will have a glass with me, but 99% of the time it definitely is ME that has instigated it - cant remember the last time he did.
Come the weekend he is a few beers kinda man, though I suspect since being together he has drunk more because we do socialise with my already very sociable family and friends A LOT.

This weekend is different. We are doing a lot of sport in the morning and the garden on Saturday afternoon, then having a bbq and watching a movie with the kids. Would normally invite people over, but not doing it this week. I just want to get through the weekend as sober as humanly possible!

That sounds so ridiculous when I say it back to myself.

inside well I'm more than a little bit overweight but it's bad enough telling you lot I really am a total jake without saying I'm a bloody FAT jake. Thanks you for your loveliness and your sparkling wit!!! Ps a heifer is a very finely bred, very expensive, top quality prize cow!!! Does this help???? Not sure really, scratches head and heads for bath to ponder this xxxx

little done it all babe.. I've bought 2 and hid one in the veg rack in the fridge and one in plain view, then top up between the 2 so dh thinks I only drank some of one. Honest to God I cringe at my own actions, like dh didn't see me fidgeting behind the fridge door and bottles clanging, aye you've come to the right place little nothing shocks us (well inside can a bit sometimes) we'll do it together xxx

I love you already, everyone. only done two hours work this week and I'm climbing the walls wanting wine ( even though I have a headache without it today). just reading here has taken the edge off. I'm off swimming with little one now and have noticed my nails really need doing. usually when that happens I make the excuse that it's too late to do them in the evening but actually it's because I've been drinking and Fuck then up.
I'm pretty sure I will drink on this holiday next week, but I'm sure as hell the thought processes etc will be very different and I'm so looking forward to enjoying it for what it is, there is so much sightseeing to do, no time to stop for a drink every hour. yipppppeeeeeee.
I'll be checking in tonight for sure, when it gets tempting, I promise! I'll try and think of more cringe tastic ways I've hidden booze.
thank you all so much already.

Thought of one. Not hidden it but "things Ive done under the influence".... bought the kids stuff they have blatantly asked for because they know I had been drinking.... looked at laptop the next day "WTF????!!!"

So grim reading it back.

Im off to spend wednesday wine money on a funky new nail polish, will look awesome and my head wont hurt or my liver

well I knew I'd fall at some point, wine replacement nail stuff = £25. whoops. I don't even feel bad, I'd have done that normally AND bought wine AND not done my nails

Ahem- I think you may have forgotten a few.
How about 'plain wine' not really counting when having a meal out. Therefore you can drink several glasses of sparkly stuff THEN switch to 'plain wine' Brilliant!

I always had a highly complicated financial system going on in my head working out how and when and what was allowed and how much I had gone over by and if I had so much tonight then I can reeeeaallly go for it teh following night. I can feel that level of stupidity starting up again.

Welcome little I think you are in just the right place.

baby could you get a part time job doing what you did before? Just to get out of the house and meet other adults?

waves at isinde singing away in her car.

Afternoon, tis me, Mouse

I shall return after I have played with Nemo for a while, and done my paperwork! Committee Chair, who's idea was that?

Back later, welcome Littegreen - nice to meet you :) x

littlegreen - sorry

Checking in.
Wave to babes old and new.
Lots of lambs, lots of stress, lots of wine
Miss you all, luffs you all
Be back soon xx

7pm and not faltered yet. BF has popped in and gone, little one off to bed in half an hour, this is where I would be itching to open it.
To be honest I am itching to open one. But I wont. Not least because I still dont feel Ive recovered from Saturday!!!
I said earlier this is af day 3, thats how crap I am, its af day 4!!!

I need to control the weekends more give them up completely but even just thinking I can make a whole week of work days without going in hungover ONCE is making this already worthwhile!!

Now heres a wobble. DD 16 is unexpectedly off to a friend's for the night. This is green light (nothing to do with my name!) for me to open a bottle as she wont be hanging around seeing how much I drain.

So Ive cooked a really healthy dinner, poured a blackcurrant, posted on here and promised to watch an episode of breaking bad with DS 15.

Yikes. That was close :(

Morning babes
I'd love to help with the lambs too. Grew up on a farm and we always had orphan lambs to look after. They're cute for a few months and then they're pretty tasty.

Welcome little. Stick around. This bus is awesome. In the months that I've been hopping on and off my drinking has improved enormously. Still battling, but nothing like I used to be. xx

hey babes

Well done little. You are strengthening your resolve by staying away from the wine. Doesn't matter about tomorrow just get today sorted.

Hey there soc and rural and mouse x

Hi guggs

Hi lovely guggs the only reason I ever gave up
My career is down to my crohn's making it too difficult to travel and I became a nervous wreck making the whole thing worse. My doctor thinks the same rule still applies. I certainly need something, maybe a part time uni course... Maybe even a sales/customer service job at home.. For now I will focus on getting my body fit and healthy and getting some confidence back. little your doing everything right, be kind to yourself and reward yourself and if it gets tough, just take it hour by hour and it almost always passes. I'm right behind you in day 3. guggs how are you managing my lovely? Is moderating working for you, how do your family feel about it? My dd1 sulks when she sees a wine bottle, I drank very very heavily at the height of my depression and I think that's what she relates too, she's old enough to know there's a problem but she is also very controlling some friends say i let her boss me too much. Anyway rambling again, hugs to sober rural the gorgeous mouse xxx