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Relationships

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Original poster

Licking fingers after being inside me...sorry for icky topic!

82 replies

Disconcerted · 13/02/2014 09:41

Really sorry for posting this, but it's bothering me.

Every time I have sex with my partner, he uses his fingers inside me, which is lovely and he takes it slowly, enjoys doing it, always does that before anything else, and so on.

But every time, he licks his fingers afterwards.

I ignored it for a long time but I have on occasion just said something like "oh, stop that" in a kind of lighthearted way, his response is always the same; "you're tasty".

It makes me feel like a KFC bargain bucket or something!

I mean, a quick google has proven that a lot of men do it, but it can't taste that good to want to lick your fingers afterwards, can it?!

I'm worried it's more like either a power trip sort of thing (although how it can be construed as that exactly, I don't know) or just a weird fetish.

What do you think? Do you get turned off by men doing this sort of thing or am I just a freak?

OP posts:

MargotLovedTom · 13/02/2014 11:07

God what a pita when people come along berating someone for the content of an OP when it's clear from the title what it's going to be about! Don't read it if it bothers you.

Akin to eavesdropping on someone's conversation, then feeling the need to butt in and tell them their subject matter is out of order. Don't bloody listen! Don't bloody read it!

Fancynancypants1 · 13/02/2014 11:09

I thonk men these days try to imitate what they watch on porn sites. My guy wants to lick my asshole all the time then kiss the face off me. gross n he is a medic so shpuld know the anal region is full of bacterium. washed botty or not. Filthy pigs.

saulaboutme · 13/02/2014 11:28

Is it the way he licks his fingers?? If he does it noisily the gross. Anyway you don't like it maybe he should enjoy it abit more quietly! I don't know!

kentishgirl · 13/02/2014 11:39

KFC bucket! (finger lickin' good!)

Is it the way he does it and what he said that you find offputting? You need to make this clearer to him - and repeat the KFC thing to get your point across. 'tasty' is a bit of a weird way to put it. It's not food! It comes across differently to 'mmm you taste nice' which is probably what he meant (and nicer to hear?) I keep thinking about McDonalds 'Big Tasty' as well, lol.

But you also seem to have a bit of an issue with accepting that hey, maybe you do taste good. I don't think it's a fetish or weird to think that, it's rather flattering really.

Warning TMI below for the people who open a thread about sex and then complain about reading about sex

OH loves the taste of me, and says so (but more tactfully). I'll do the touch myself and put fingers in his mouth thing - he loves it. Actually I agree with him - I think I taste nice too. Have you never kissed your OH after he's been down on you?

sebsmummy1 · 13/02/2014 11:41

It obviously turns him on. If it turns you off though you need to tell him that.

laregina · 13/02/2014 11:42

Have a marshmallow waiting up there for him next time - tis Valentines day and all.

Think I'm getting my threads confused...

WhateverTrevor83 · 13/02/2014 11:45

FancyNancy thanks for making me spit tea all over myself. HAHAHA x

Lweji · 13/02/2014 11:46

And the reason I used that title was precisely so those that didn't want to read, wouldn't. No other way I could write it really, was there

You could have put the warning on the title and leave the details for the post.

Anyway, if it puts you off, tell him to stop. Otherwise, it's his choice. I don't see how it could be a power trip thing.
After all, men who give oral must get the same thing, only it's less obvious.

Lweji · 13/02/2014 11:47

the anal region is full of bacterium

Bacteria. It would have to be a very large bacterium to fill the anal region.

pedant

GoodnessIsThatTheTime · 13/02/2014 12:02

Id find it gross too but perhaps I'm more sheltered than I thought!!

stooshe · 13/02/2014 12:07

Well they do say not to insert anything in the vagina that you wouldn't put in your mouth(lol).
I take it you don't have a problem if your partner performs cunnilingus on you. Kinda the same thing, but without the finger part!

laregina · 13/02/2014 12:09

Who says that?

Offred · 13/02/2014 12:15

Yeah, can't really say anything other than think about why you don't like it. If it is because you think other people will think it is weird then it's pretty normal tbh and I wouldn't worry. If you actually don't like it then just tell him to stop and if he doesn't then break up with him.

Think MN prudishness is funny. If you'd posted "he does something I don't like in bed, embarrassed to say what" there'd be a chorus of "what is it?". You've been explicit and got "oh my eyes!" Ha ha ha! Can't win!

Only1scoop · 13/02/2014 12:24

Don't think it's a weird 'fetish' of any kind....but if you don't like it just say what you think don't mince your words....

MoominIsGoingToBeAMumEEEEK · 13/02/2014 12:29

Come on! He's missing a trick there if he's saying "tasty" as opposed to "Finger lickin' good!".

On a slightly more serious note, ew. I guess we'll find something other than fish fingers to have tonight.

ScarlettMantleplume · 13/02/2014 12:30

Offer him a dollop of tartare sauce to go with it next time.

Only1scoop · 13/02/2014 12:36

And a lemon tissue

rosiesarered · 13/02/2014 12:41

why the references to fish fingers and tartar sauce?
women don't smell or taste like fish.
its things like that and vagisil that make women feel dirty and ashamed.

Offred · 13/02/2014 12:49

Yeah, I agree rosiesarered. Why are people making such anti-female comments?

elizadofuckall · 13/02/2014 12:57

Ugh what is wrong with you? Fish? Really? Grow up,

Original poster

Disconcerted · 13/02/2014 13:05

I agree with those that are hating the references to fis, by the way. If you taste or smell like fish you probably have B.V so might want to get to your doctor before making snarky comments on here.

I don't know exactly why it bothers me, I suppose it is the way he does/words it.

Its like an impulse when he does it; its almost an incognito quick lick as he moves, slightly turned away from me as he does it, as if he was hoping I wouldn't notice. I've mentioned it twice, he's always done it as I've been turning round or we've been moving in some way (changing positions or whatever) and when I've said jokingly stop that, that's when hes just said 'its tasty'.

Maybe in context, if he noticeably licked his fingers and said I tasted good then fair enough, might be different, I don't know.

Maybe because he's not over experiments sex wise, he's a bit shy to make a show of it or be all 'mmm you taste good' so that's the only way he feels comfortable doing it?

OP posts:

Only1scoop · 13/02/2014 13:09

Op ....I think it is definately the words accompanying his action, rather than the action itself. It's sounds almost like a rehearsed little phrase he has and sounds like the ultimate turn off.

Botanicbaby · 13/02/2014 13:13

Never ceases to amaze me that people can be in an intimate sexual relationship yet are unable to tell their partner in no uncertain terms what is a turn-off.

Why are you even asking if others get turned off by this? You're the one having sex with him. Tell him how you feel and don't do it in a 'light-hearted' way. If he continues to laugh it off and do as he pleases then he clearly doesn't give a shit about your feelings or needs.

To the posters making references to fish, what age are you? [The only time you could conceivably have a 'fishy' odour is if you are suffering from BV] but hey, lets perpetuate myths about women and their smell

Botanicbaby · 13/02/2014 13:16

x-posted with you OP.

It really doesn't matter what his problem is, if YOU don't like him doing it, just ask him to stop. It sounds like a total turn-off that he is doing it surreptitiously too.

Original poster

Disconcerted · 13/02/2014 13:16

You know, the more I think about it, maybe it is that he has a stock of strange little phrases, tried and tested wit others that hadn't ever been confident enough to tell him it sounds strange.

He's very into boosting my confidence, in the past he has mentioned being with women that were under confident in that area or had been abused (there's a reason he mentioned that last part, it wasn't a random comment) and talked about how he made them feel wanted, and reassured, etc.

When we first got together he kept telling me to 'relax' while he had his fingers inside me, which kind of made me feel less relaxed! Lol. It made me feel quite pressured and then I'd lose 'that' feeling, and e would reassure me it was fine, but I should 'relax and just enjoy the sensation'. I was trying! :)

Keeps on about how he wants to give me the best orgasm of my life, everything he said just sounds a bit flowery and rehearsed.

Maybe that IS the problem.

OP posts:

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