I think my dh has just left me

[daisydee43]

Am pretty numb so excuse the writing...

Dh was on lads night out with work ppl - started at 4pm then at 9pm rings to get me to pick him up. I say no cos dd asleep and we already agreed he would get a cab. Now he said were done and his gone to his mums (which he has never done). He bought up lots of stuff like how hard he works to give me and dd a good life and I do nothing for him (I work PT but he's always resented me having days off but then says he doesn't want me to work!?)
I'm so confused and numb - I know I have a lot to lose and without him I'd have nothing but I love him to bits and he breaks my heart

If he's genuinely ill then getting mil involved would be the right thing to do. It's not a domestic, it's a mental health crisis.
It's not his fault that he's ill. But it is his fault that he isn't seeking treatment, taking responsibility and minimising the impact his illness has on you and his child. You cannot raise a child and have a relationship with an unmedicated and untreated bipolar sufferer, it's just not fair, especially on your daughter. You are going to have to involve his family and start thinking about the future in a hard headed and sensible way. I know you don't want to lose him but you have a child to think about.

You cannot raise a child and have a relationship with an unmedicated and untreated bipolar sufferer

I cannot tell you how much I agree with this.

OP I think he needs to move out for a while, hopefully during which time he will start taking responsibility for his OWN MENTAL HEALTH.

This is exactly what happened to me.

In my worst state, I didn't live at home. DH made me leave, or more accurately, didn't let me come home after 2 months on the psychiatric ward. BEST possible decision he could have made, actually. I couldn't see it at the time but DH could, and made the right decision for the DDs (5 and 2 at the time). And for us, as it turned out.

Living apart from my family for 18 months made me really understand my illness, how to live with it, how to self motivate, how to really look after MYSELF and not rely on someone else to do it.

Good luck OP, it is not easy.