I had a row with husband

[noslimbody]

and it was an eye-opener
Since I passed my test 5 years ago, he has shouted at me so much, that I started having panic attacks and now feel unable to drive. This has extremely restricted my life and has made my agoraphobia worse and he knows this.
Today I told him that he has deeply restricted my life and turned me into a prisoner. He responded with 'there is nothing stopping you from walking outside"

He is right

There is nothing stopping you from leaving him

So do it. Get help and make that your objective.

A very cruel thing for him to say, but then that's not a surprise, because he's an irredeemably cruel man. What do you want to do?

I'm sorry you're married to a bully. Please get help. Womens Aid 0808 2000 247 might be a good place to start.

I'm sorry, but I agree. You can go outside and are using how he treats you as an excuse for your anxieties and reasons not to. I bet he's fed up of being the whipping boy for your agoraphobia.

I was the same with my DH but for my BED (binge eating disorder). He's a big bloke that overeats and isn't bothered about diet or control. I blamed my inabilities to control myself on him leading me astray. Truth is, that was convenient to blame him, meant my lack of control wasn't my fault.

As soon as I realised this, realised that only I could overcome my problems and nobody else was to blame, only then did I face up to it and I've more control than I've ever had. I'm not cured but I manage it better. It hard though.

I should of read through before I sent. I sound like a right heartless bitch and I'm sorry. You probably don't have my issues at all? Even so, it is about you taking control for yourself and only you can do it.

Look you do need help.

You are in an abusive relationship and it is one of the most destructive things and difficult things to get out of. Sounds simplistic but anyone who has ever been there will understand how hard it is.

I am sure that there is a lot more that you want to say.

I started with my GP who was amazing. You need real life support, do you have any?

I just feel defeated by it all. I want a break. I can not deal with any of it at all. I have an appointment on Monday at the GP do discuss counelling and/or anti-d's

Don't bother with anti depression,sounds like the only thing you need it to get out while you can he's trying to control you ,it gets worse believe me!!!

My ex terrorised me so much, didn't allow me out for months, then whenever we did go out, shite driving, picking issues with me etc, and the general lunacy of the place we were living that I developed agoraphobia.

It took coming home to sort that out. That and some hefty doses of rescue remedy! :)

Lovey, you can do this. I know how scary it is, but if you dig deep, get help from the Dr, you can do it.

I knew ADs would be potentially a way forward, but I don't have much success with them, so wanted to try something else. Rescue Remedy helped.

Main thing is to get free of your bully, and commit to getting yourself free of this irrational fear.

Get rid of him, and many of your issues will start to dissipate.

Would you feel better if you could drive? There are some organisations that help with anxious drivers, they could help you get back behind the wheel.

Do you have any friends who'd sit with you driving? So you get the better of it?