social services are destroying my family

[justalilmummy]

Social services have ruined my family and I just dont know what to do anymore, I want to run away from it all
My partner had a mental breakdown 15 months ago, leading up to this there were a few issues (arguments got out of hand abd police were called, 3 times last time 2.5 years ago)
After hes breakdown social services became involved and we were under a child in need plan
The plan said I was to protect my children by not allowing the children to be alone with their father - which I did
Partner after being released from the psychiatric hospital after 8 days was allocated a mental health nurse who he saw regularly
Everything was going great social workers visited as they still had a slight concern about dp state of mind
4 months ago he was discharged completly as they felt he was fine now and he did not have a mental disorder
Things took a bad turn after this as social worker did not agree with the decision
They first tried to convince dp to go to the doctors and get medication to help hes ' depression' even though he does not have it.
Dp did not do this so one day they turned up in the evening and said they are very concerned and he is not to come inside the family home, we were shocked by this but he went and stayed at hes mums, which we again did
6 weeks ago a child protection conference was held and they have put the children on child protection for the 'risk of emotional abuse' as father refuses to accept hes problem and I am downplaying hes mental health issues even though hes mental health worker says he doesnt have any mental disorder!
The conference was held as if he was still in the family home which he is not
Its now got even worse as they have told us that I need therapy to come to terms with the 'domestic abuse' I have suffered and my child needs therapy as well, also dp has to attend a parenting course.
They have made it very difficult for dp to attend any of these meetings as they hold them all in the afternoon even though we have repeatedly told them he can only do mornings coz of hes work
They threatened me this afternoon that as I am reluctant to go to therapy I'm giving het ammunition to take it to court for a care order
I must add there has been absolutely no issue since hes breakdown 15 months ago
This is having an awful effect on my 4 year old ds, he is waking nightly crying for hes daddy, hes begun wetting himself at school and s not eating properly
I just dont know what to do, they say this is coz he is at risk of emotional damage when it's them causing all the upset in this household :-(

[ChaiseLounger]

If the child wants more contact why are SS not arranging supervised contact for the dad?

[PoisonPension]

I think they are trying to push you into private family court proceedings. As there has been dv and S's would support you you could go to court to stop contact yourself. The problem is cafcass would have to take the childs wishes and feelings into account. Your child wants more contact.

[MatildaTheCat]

The important thing to realise about Child Protection Plans is that they are designed to allow a situation to change and improve with very intensive levels of professional support and supervision. If after regular reviews nothing has changed then the CPP isn't working and SS will be under pressure to look at legal alternatives. I some cases this could be care proceedings but if this is fully truthful then it sounds way more likely that they are considering cutting contact with dad altogether. Why they don't seem able to communicate this with you is odd but perhaps protocol until they've consulted their lawyers.

Yor dc have been subject to a CPP for too long. That's why this is happening.

[ThatIsNachoCheese]

Op, you should have been sent the minutes from the CP Conference which will have the CP Plan in them, have you had This? If not, call and ask for them to send it to you.
if they have a legal planning meeting and it's agreed threshold has been met for legal proceedings then the next step will be a Public Law Outline meeting, once you are invited to this you will be eligible for legal aid and can get legal advice.

[MummyToo2Kiddies]

My daughter is at the moment living with her dad but only through social services there is NO COURT ORDER in place. Social services have told my ex that he can stop my contact with my daughter when he likes but i think this isnt right as there has been no court order so surely i still have my 50% rights?
This is killing me because my daughter is my world and i am pregnant with her little brother/sister and i cant spend time with my daughter. Can anyone give me any information about this or if anyone else is going through this too please reply. It will help alot as my mum only has 3 hours every two weeks with my daughter and i only have 3 hours a week and its killing us :(

[goddessofsmallthings]

How old is your dd and why have SS placed her with your ex/her father, Mum2?

I suggest you copy your post (above) and use it to start a new thread on this board.

[FromTheTree]

I think its impossible from posts like yours OP to tell what is really going on.

Social services could be overstepping the mark, sometimes they do get involved in families where the kids are really loved and looked after but the parent or parents are temporarily struggling. I know this because I have experience of this, unfortunately. I would never trust a social worker as a result, as they came wading in and were of zero help. However, equally, social workers have to get involved where harm is either being done to children or there is real potential for harm. Just because a parent says their child is fine doesn't mean it is! Some parents are deluded, or even manipulative.

Stay strong and keep going with social services. You are not the only person who has ever had these kinds of issues. Continue to try and do the right thing. Thats all we can ever do.

[blueskyinmarch]

ZOMBIE THREAD FOLKS!!!!!!

[asdfghjjkl]

once social get their teeth into they are like a dog with a bone , they don't seem to be capable of looking forwards without bringing up the past they keep harping on about history , we have involvement in our family i have sgo for my granddaughter and as much as my daughter tries to show she has changed they keep on about the past, and they twist everything you say and then accuse you of not cooperating with them because you don't trust them.
They are the most evil people on the planet if only people really knew what goes on... can i recommend a Facebook page to you justalilmummy...."social service and family court (help and guidance)uk '" their are some great people on there who will give you advice