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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

what do you do if your dc dont want to go with their dad?

77 replies

aaaaaaa · 02/01/2014 15:00

I don't think its for any really good reason, they would just rather be with me. That said he is/was slightly EA with me

he doesn't put much effort into encouraging them to go with him.

today, as a result he has been in my house for the last 4 hours. He has just asked if i am cooking food! I said i want him to take them to his house and cook, because i want some time to myself. He got angry with me and said i as fucking rude. He always thinks the responsibility ismine to make them go with him. I feel like he should actually parent them on the 1 day a week he sees them. Its my 'day off' isn't it?

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FinallyGotAnIPhone · 03/01/2014 13:55

Reading the thread, as I am in a similar ish situation. My ex is emotionally abusive, and our children are 3 and a baby. He is not an alcoholic though. We split about four months ago.

Lots of posters are quite derogatory about OPs choices, when in reality as someone already said, it's much easier to judge when not in the situation yourself. I can relate to the "in out of my depth" comment. I know no-one else in the same position as me in RL so I have no frame of reference. I started off letting the ex into my house, here for breakfast, using the car etc. In time I've seen that it is not a sensible thing to do for us,but it's taken a while and I am just trying to do my best, we all are.

Good luck OP.

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aaaaaaa · 03/01/2014 20:27

thanks for your support iphone I hope your situation improves too.
It is difficult isnt it. I might have made the wrong choices, but I know I have alwayshad the childrens wellbeing and happiness as my priority

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