The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Stepping Into Christmas With Sobriety On Their Minds.

[Mouseface]

Hello, tis me, Mouse

This is a thread for those who are worried about their drinking habits, relationships with alcohol, and/or drugs.

Even if you think your intake has gone up more today than the last or this week than last, come and join us on Gerald, the amazing, always room for more, fully stocked with glorious treats and donned in his Christmas Decorations, Bus!

We are a supportive thread, full of very different posters, from various backgrounds. Some of us drink in moderation, allowing ourselves the odd glass or two as a treat, or just because we're in control of our drinking for that day.

One Day At A Time.

We have those who abstain completely, and those who wake every day to Day 1 and hope with all of their hearts that they can, and will, make it to Day 2.

If you've followed our journey to date, you'll know who most of us are by now smile and we kind of have two 'sayings', that sum up who we are -

1. • The Vulnerable Need Our Support, Not Our Judgement
2. • Alcohol Fosters Inertia

That said, we will not have any bashing of support groups, such as AA or Community Addiction Support Teams, or even other support threads, posts like that will be reported if the need arises, so 'Orange Paper supporters' don't waste your time please :)

This Bus is a place for honesty, sanctuary and safety, something that has taken almost four years for a number of very special, very lovely, very honest and caring Babes to establish.

So, come find a seat, grab something warm from the supply cupboard at the back of the Bus, it's filled with (non alcoholic or narcotic) delicious, luxury treats and HUGE fluffy quilts, plus anything else you might need to help YOU get through YOUR day a minute, or an hour at a time.

And, if you'd like to see where this all began - This Is The Reason We're All Here, The Original JWN Thread

And This Is Our Previous Thread, With Links To Those Over The Past Few Years

We hope to meet you soon :) x

Evening, tis me, Mouse

Just popping in to say I love you all for your kind remarks, comments and unconditional support.

DH, DD and Nemo are ALL ill so I have a super busy weekend looking after them all.

Be strong Braves

I'm reading and thinking of you all xxx

Mouse sorry to hear you have a poorly household. I meant to say before - your lovely words to your Dad at the funeral were just amazing, so kind and reassuring.

rural you are definitely winning the majority of the battles lately, well done tonight too. You are the bees knees

Im can you let us know you are ok babe?

I am off to do the drill now. Goodnight all xx

beaches what colour tutu do you fancy wearing? (settles down with quiz to improve on 9/20 score so far, snaffles some opal fruits off a hanging garland).

On the subject of all things literary, does anyone have any good books to recommend? Now my head isn't spinning with wine can get some more reading done!

Aw Mouse sorry your household is beset by illness. Sending you a virtual hot chocolate and fluffy blankets xxx.

Hello Babes

Please fill me on this game 6/20 (or whatever). I'm in dire need of a new addiction.

All going ok here. Had a couple of glasses of wine last night and just thought 'what am I doing' and went to bed. So feeling ok about it because I didn't finish the bottle, but a bit pissed off because it was just a bleurgh moment. If I'm going to give in, surely it should be for something good.

I'm dog tired today. My tolerance has gone right down so the after effects are bad, but reinforces that I don't want this shit in my life.

Back out again tonight to another fucking function. I'm driving again so I'll be good and it's at a nice restaurant so I'll stuff my face and enjoy the free meal.

One good thing is that as time passes I get more determined to give up drinking and I also realise that life without wine is not a bad thing.

And good god, what has happened to Gerald! Who is in charge of interior decorating around here?

Isinde my family were drinkers too - not in a way that was upsetting or anything, we just saw.it as normal, and my parents were fairly moderate, but I never got told off for being drunk in my teens, it was just seen as amusing. Took me two more decades to realise how un-fun it can be.

Love tour Liberace comment. That was dd's look when she was about 5. Always remember her toddling off to non uniform day wearind a pink fur trimmed waistcoat, pink velvet jeans and a feather boa. Thankfully she has calmed down now.

Soc, the quiz is in a link by faire a bit further back. Addictive! Would re-post but on my phone (which I hope also excuses the typos)

Have a good Saturday babes. (trips over pile of tangled fairy lights while attempting to exit Gerald)

Can we open the christmas chocolate now? Please,please...
Puts a traditional christmas hymn on- fairytale of new york should do.

socfish good work there. It really isn't much of a step from having a small amount of wine to having nothing at all. And if you are like me then 2 normal glasses of wine won't really touch the sides anyway. Have a great evening tonight.

Isinde sorry to hear about the family and booze situation. How do they react to not drinking? Am I right in thinking that dp doesn't drink? No excuse for being rude to her though.

My job for the next few weeks is to find a new delicious af sparkling drink for christmas day. There is still that horrible whisper:" go on- it's christmas,you deserve it..." So bollocks to the ww. I will not be drinking today and have no plans to drink at any point over christmas.

mouse gosh you are having a tough time aren't you, now having to play nurse to the entire family! Who gets to nurse YOU?

isinde families are... weird. It's impossible to stand back and look at them objectively when it's your own, isn't it? If it was anyone else, you'd say "Stuff 'em" but we have these strange ties to our own... At least you didn't drown your sorrows too much.

I was doing so well... managed not to drink all week (too bloody tired) finally had a couple of drinks Thursday night.

But - oh dear - I was so tired yesterday - went Christmas shopping, hot & fed-up and I stupidly went and bought a whole bottle of wine. I know it's too much, 2 mini-bottles (500ml) is my limit - I think I just lost the plot.

So so stupid.

I usually have a bath and wash my hair every other night. Well last night, not only did I stay up too late as usual but I didn't get my bath. I hate myself for being dirty and lazy. Only one step away from being the smelly unkempt alcoholic on the street. Ugh.

joey you are being too hard on yourself. All week you were winning and last night you let your guard down. This does not make you a failure. Have a bath today. Put some glitter in the water and you will look perfect on this glitterati bus! By the way, watch out for Venus and her tambourine, she take no prisoners when it comes to hangovers

joey you are hard on yourself,I'm sure that you are nothing like a park bench sleeper! A nice af night and a wash,maybe a hairbush and some deodorant and you'll be as good as new. Ermm.. perhaps change your clothes too and... sorry,couldn't resist

Hi all. WW nearly got me due to horribly 'challenging' behaviour from ds. I love him but I haven't liked him an awful lot today. Sadly for him boundaries are going to be set tomorrow. Lump of coal for christmas,I reckon.

Stay strong babes if you have made it this far without booze then hang on a little longer. Post here and distract yourself long enough for the ww to bugger off.

Loving Gerald's new Christmas Liberace look!
I have done the tree tonight and its completely OTT and fab u lous.
Will try and upload a pic if I can
Are you all ok tonight?

Thanks beaches and guggs

Yes, AF and a nice bath tonight.

How are you doing tonight ma ?

I'm fine joey. Been really busy today.
Think I've put the photo of the dcs on my profile....not sure if its worked as on my tablet.

Ma love the pic

Evening, tis me, Mouse

Another late night as sleep = nightmares and bad dreams. Nemo is in our bed, DH out in the office which has a bedroom and bathroom, and DD is in bed, coughing and struggling to sleep......

I had another night of bad dreams, it's two weeks today since I was at my Dad's at this hour, telling him I was going up to Mum's sewing room, to try and sleep for a while whilst my bro, sister and his GF were making sure Dad was 'OK'.

This morning, Nemo asked where Daddy was, I said "Daddy's poorly sweetie, he's got a horrible cough" and he replied "Oh NO!"

I said "What sweetie?"

He replied "Grandma had a cough and she died, is Daddy going to be 'died' too now?"

He knows that he meant 'dead' but I've asked him to stop saying dead as he would say 'I'm dead' when playing and it upset me....

Anyway, I had to fight so hard to smile through the tears.

Why are children so intune and yet seem so confused by how life/death/illness works.

Tonight, I have him in our bed as I need to rest and not be squashed in his bed with him when he wakes struggling to breathe and cough, full of horrid secretions.

He's not had a single week of 'dryness' at all this year. He's had a congested chest and nose etc for the entire year, it's so not fair for him. Poor wee fish

I'm sorry that I've not read back, my head is pickled...... not in an alcohol way, in an it's been two weeks way and I'd normally be texting/calling my mum tonight to say that were getting our Christmas on in the Mouse House tomorrow, just to make her smile......

Today I sorted through the bouquets of flowers and threw the dead ones out, I put the live ones in fresh water and vases etc, the luck of being an ex florist. :)

It was peaceful to do and each stem felt like a part of her, removing the illness and keeping the good parts. Does that makes sense to anyone?

I know I'm all over the place but this is one of the only outlets I have. DH is worried about me. I want to walk along the river - any river - and just breathe. Just be.

It's Seth our Wolf's Birthday today and he's in the kennels because DH is too poorly to walk him so we put him in the kennel so that he'll get lots of attention and love! :) They adore him there :)

So, enough of me. Your posts to me have all been so kind.

Joey - who gets to nurse me? Me. Well done on the AF night xxx

Ma - YAY for Christmas Tree :) Hope things are okay with you? I mean really.xxx

I hope that you're all okay and managing to get through this festive temptation that is waved in front of you each and every day! It's the 'norm' don't you know to get shitfaced. lose your knickers and go home with the biggest twat at your place of work - BUT NOT THIS YEAR!!

This year - Gerald is driving and picking up any 'at risk' Babes and keeping them safe.

Night all..... xxx

PS - to those who have kicked the shit out of the WW/alcohol tonight, well done. I hope you're all safe and sound.

I'm and Why - special thoughts to you two. XXxxXX

Hello peeps I'm back after hitting all time low after a weeks binge missing work and burying my head in the sand all because I've hit breaking point with 3 payday loans! I'm now at the end of day 3 AF and feeling positive after sorting help from a debt charity. Think this has been my route cause of depression anxiety and drinking , how is everyone xx

ThisIs - welcome back. xxx

I'm glad that you have come back, regardless of the circumstances.... YOU CAME BACK! And that says that you want to try. Try and kick that WW's skinny sly ass again. :)

Hello mouse, you're doing so well. Love your posts. xx

Welcome back this. Good to come back. This bus is a fine place.

Sober Sunday here. Feeling fabulous. hope you're all doing ok up there.
xxx

Oh Mouse. I don't really know you but reading your posts I feel for you so, so much. I lost my mum to sudden cancer. The grief, disorientation, dreams, the anthropomorphic comforts of touching things relating to her (you with the flowers, me ordering all the things in the house before the sale as I lost dad first). I feel it is unfair that we go through the same loss, but nobody can make it better because each family, each mum and daughter, each bond, is unique and irreplaceable. It is a universal grief, yet each case is its own special one - which is what made our love so worthwhile and a gift. It's 8 years for me now, but I can relate as if it were yesterday. But the bonds you have with the people left, and the flashes of your mum you see in the dcs, and the days you are so proud of them and offer up their progress to her influence, and the love you learned from your mum and have in your heart to pass on to your children ... That is her living on in you. I found it so, so hard. But am still here and have the most amazing kids.And dd and Nemo are her legacy too, as you are. I so wish I could make it better, you are an incredible woman, keeping this thread going. It is helping me, and so many others. Your mum would be the proudest person in the world x

Ps hi this. Good on you girl for seeking loans advice and getting on Gerald. Hope you are not claustrophobic as we are being overwhelmed with tinsel and decorations. Sit down and have a mince pie .

Soc hello. Still not used to you having sober Sunday when I am just getting my head down for sleepy Saturday! Glad you are ok xxx

Had 2 weeks of being completely dry but had a shockingly bad day emotionally yesterday which saw me subsequently buying some wine to calm myself down. Drank the whole bloody bottle

I feel a bit hungover today. Am disappointed with myself for caving in after being so good for 2 weeks. I'm trying not to beat myself up about it but its hard and its not very reassuring that I have the strength mentally to either give it up completely OR be able to drink moderately.