The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Stepping Into Christmas With Sobriety On Their Minds.

[Mouseface]

Hello, tis me, Mouse

This is a thread for those who are worried about their drinking habits, relationships with alcohol, and/or drugs.

Even if you think your intake has gone up more today than the last or this week than last, come and join us on Gerald, the amazing, always room for more, fully stocked with glorious treats and donned in his Christmas Decorations, Bus!

We are a supportive thread, full of very different posters, from various backgrounds. Some of us drink in moderation, allowing ourselves the odd glass or two as a treat, or just because we're in control of our drinking for that day.

One Day At A Time.

We have those who abstain completely, and those who wake every day to Day 1 and hope with all of their hearts that they can, and will, make it to Day 2.

If you've followed our journey to date, you'll know who most of us are by now smile and we kind of have two 'sayings', that sum up who we are -

1. • The Vulnerable Need Our Support, Not Our Judgement
2. • Alcohol Fosters Inertia

That said, we will not have any bashing of support groups, such as AA or Community Addiction Support Teams, or even other support threads, posts like that will be reported if the need arises, so 'Orange Paper supporters' don't waste your time please :)

This Bus is a place for honesty, sanctuary and safety, something that has taken almost four years for a number of very special, very lovely, very honest and caring Babes to establish.

So, come find a seat, grab something warm from the supply cupboard at the back of the Bus, it's filled with (non alcoholic or narcotic) delicious, luxury treats and HUGE fluffy quilts, plus anything else you might need to help YOU get through YOUR day a minute, or an hour at a time.

And, if you'd like to see where this all began - This Is The Reason We're All Here, The Original JWN Thread

And This Is Our Previous Thread, With Links To Those Over The Past Few Years

We hope to meet you soon :) x

Thinking of you Mouse.

Will be having an AF night this evening - chucked out all the wine in the house last night so I can't be tempted!

Good luck all :)

Afternoon all,
Thinking of you mouse xx
WW got me last night and have a busy day today that I now have to get through with a hangover
Will read back later.
Day 1 again.
Love to all XX

Thinking of you Mouse xx

WW has got me too the past few nights. Had managed to stop drinking on work nights but it's crept in this week. Been really busy, forced overtime, constant criticism/abuse from the public....anyway have had np more than 200mls of wine a night but I know over the course of the week it's too much. And a slippery slope

hi soc and rural and annie and paw

Glad to hear it was boring soc iykwim

Good idea to throw the wine out paw have you got some soft alternatives for tonight?

Forget yesterday- today is a good day to begin again. Every single af day or fewer glasses of wine is a step in the right direction and they build up resistance to the ww. Just keep trying until it begins to be a bit easier.

Evening, tis me, Mouse

Yesterday was amazing. The relief I felt once the curtains closed was so overwhelming, which may sound strange to some but all my sadness seemed to leave me and only a sense or serenity and calm was apparent.

The service was beautiful, simple and just as mum had wanted; with all of her family and friends there, so much so that people were stood at the back, and even outside the chapel. That blew me away.

The words I wrote to her, about her are on my thread in bereavement for those who want to read them. I didn't want to post them on here as I've taken up enough of this thread with my grief

I did drink yesterday, I had planned to, but I stuck to vodka and the full bottle of slimline tonic, with lime and loads of ice in a tall glass, so mostly tonic and water!

There weren;t enough chairs for the people at the party after either!! The pub was PACKED!!! Such a fitting tribute to a wonderful lady who clearly touched so many lives.........

After Nemo had gone to school, I went back to bed today, as I have done over the last few days, because I'd had a night of terrible, horrific nightmares about mum not having died. I was racing to get to the crem but was too late and actually woke crying. I imagine that was down to the alcohol, something that I do not want repeating.

Ever.

Thank you all so much for the support you've shown me over the last couple of weeks.....

The next big struggle will be Christmas, not so much for me, but for my dad. I'm so scared for him. He kept saying "What am I going to do without her Mouse? What will I do with my life now, she was my life"

I told him "You're going to life on dad, you're going to live your life with your children, grandchildren and friends, look at how many people are around you. Look Dad. They're not just here because of Mum, they're here for YOU TOO"

He held me and said "I love you, you always know just what to say, thank you my star."

That was when I got dust in my eyes, and had to go for a quick loo break.

Anyway, sorry not to NC you all, I'll be back tomorrow. I'm going to the church service that Nemo's school is putting on tomorrow for Christmas, I expect it will be dusty in there too.

Lots of love to you all. You are such amazingly Strong and Brave Babes. xxx

Why - I just wanted to say that you are right, so very right... the more you do to get your child back, the further away he seems to go, out of your reach.....

YOU MUST STAY CALM! Let those around you do the screaming and shouting, that't their job. NOT YOURS! You can shout alone, behind closed doors where no-one can say "Seem she lost it!"

Don't give them the ammunition sweetheart, just don't.

You have jumped through every flaming hoop, climbed every mountain, pissed in every pot and still, still it's not enough.

YET.

Keep the faith that has kept you going so far, I'm not religious but I have everything crossed for you. I hope with all of my heart that you get your boy back and soon........

Please keep posting and talking about it, letting it out here is better than letting it out to the tossers you are having to deal with.

Much love to you Brave lady. I hold much admiration for you..... I'm not sure I could do all that you have. xxx

Mouse, lovely post. I felt the same at my mum's funeral, so many people who loved her together. I wish you and your dad the strength to get through Xmas together.

Why will be sending you good vibes with every fibre of my being next Thursday.

Anne your work sounds like mine. Forced overtime at short notice now my new normal which is mnot easy at Christmas with all I have to do and go to with the dcs. Who would work in the public sector these days?

Sorry can't name check everyone, sat in car on my phone waiting to pick up ds. Hands too cold to type! Keep warm in the storms babes You can take that literally or metaphorically

Thank you for posting mouse that was a lovely post. I bet she was a wonderful woman. x

I was feeling a wee bit sorry for myself because I'm a bit bored and dh has gone out on a christmas do He'll have 1 beer and be silly on it. He drinks a tiny,tiny amount of alcohol- dunno how!

Sorry to see babes going through hard times but stay strong.Another 1/2 hour or so and we will be able to tell the ww where she can stick her christmas spirit.

Morning Babes

hugs mouse tough times for you.

and hugs to why god I hope you have your baby with your for Christmas.

Friday morning here. I've got a late appointment and my rationale for NOT drinking is what would be the point after that. If I'm going to drink I may as well make a meal out of it. Frigging strange logic, but it may just keep me sober today. I can't think further than today at the moment.

Have a good evening all ya babes
x

Hey guggs howya doin? Hang in there.
socfish you are an inspiration. But can you please drive carefully tonight as the roads are very icy round here.
Day 2 Af here so all good. Had a totally shit day at work by making complete twat of myself with lovely boss, and then some bad news re a funding bid which we didn't get. sigh my job is looking less and less secure and this hasn't helped.
mouse big love to you.
why do not let these fuckers break you! That little boy is just waiting to be with you again and no-one is going to stop it happening. Stay strong

It's Friday, so be good to yourselves babes. All those who have had a sober few days keep going - there is nothing so magical about the weekend that means you have to drink. On the contrary - don't waste this precious time by filling your head with the thought of a drink and your body with the crap of a hangover. If you find on Monday morning that you really really wished you'd drunk all weekend then there's still plenty if time left before Christmas

And if you are on day 1...... well the same applies.

Have a good day all x

Morning babes,

Getting the christmas decs out with a ds this morning and even an old grinch like me can enjoy the moment. Glad I'm not hungover and I already know I won't be drinking today so no anxiety there. Dh had a whole pint last night,probably the only pint he's had all year.

ma thanks for asking lovely. I'm knackered as always. I have the most amazing ds & dh, my job and friends are wonderful but I'm sooo tried of the childcare,housework,paperwork,e mails from work,crap from family.. same as everyone else really.
Bet you didn't make a twat of yourself at all. X

Afternoon babes; have been lurking but not posting.
Mouse, thinking of you.
Today is Day 6 for me and as Venus said above there is nothing so magical about the weekend that means I have to drink so my plan this weekend is not to indulge.

Good for you obrigada that sounds like a fine plan. Anyone else got a good plan?

I was watching the news today, and I was thinking that previously I would have had a drink because a weather storm was brewing, or that we'd survived it. I'd have had a drink because Nelson Mandela had died. I'd have found any reason as an excuse. And for me December needed no excuse because it was the Christmas month.... (in the same way that April was the Easter month and June/July/August were the summer months) and

So Babes if you're about to put yourself a drink tonight stop for a moment and ask whether you are using a ridiculous excuse.

pour not put

Hi everyone. Hope everyone is well. Today is my 2 week anniversary of my last drink and have managed to stay dry for the whole fortnight. On the one hand I feel much better - lighter and with a clearer head. However I am and have been really agitated over the last few days due to my toxic mother upsetting me (I try and have no contact with her but every now and then she rears her head). So today I really, really fancy a drink! But I am trying to stay strong. I think I will get through it. But just wanted to vent.

theeveryday EAT - anything, a boiled egg, fish fingers and beans, sausage rolls, soup, CALL A FRIEND - someone you haven't spoken to for ages, just have a big gossip, RUN A BATH and take a good book to read, then get into your pjs and read in bed, distract, distract, distract - do a jigsaw (online ones are addictive), knit, write your christmas card list....

All of those are better than having a drink. And if you do all of those and still want a drink, then do them all again. GO on, work it through.

I drank last night. So from day 35 back to day 1.

I liked the taste and I liked the feeling, but it was not in moderation so I am paying today. My sinuses are full and giving me a dull miserable headache, everything is more of an effort and I am pissed off that I broke my streak. I have realised that by tonight, (it is only 2pm here) I will be shattered just for getting through the day and this is going to encourage the WW to tempt me into the reward thing - just for reaching the end of the day. And so begins the hamster wheel. What a ridiculous cycle that is!

So I am going to NOT drink tonight.

Hangovers are miserable, physically and mentally. Don't do what I did, choose a nice weekend instead xxx

Hi all
beaches you did brilliantly and will do so again. Don't beat yourself up.
Got a busy weekend planned doing the tree, ordering turkey, posting cards, seeing to the olds etc.
Soc could you park up for a minute while I just lug this Christmas tree on to the roof rack?

ma I've been quietly making snowflakes and sticking them on the bus windows, is that ok?

Very tasteful Venus
I do like tasteful elegant Christmas decorations
hides strands of multicoloured tinsel behind back

Ooh, a Christmas tree for Gerald, thanks ma . Beaches 35 days is still amazing, one blip doesn't take away your achievement. Thanks for reminding me about hangovers though ... Tempted tonight, had long day at work then dh sat on his arse when I get in waiting for me to come home and take dd to dance just cos my coaching cancelled - god forbid I have one night off. Grrr. Not giving in tho - intervals class in morning. Exercise helps me not drink. Would be fit and thin if I wasn't eating like a maniac (puts multipack of mince pies on front seat in the hope someone else helps me eat them).

Have a lovely weekend babes. Off to find one of venus online jigsaws now (never knew they existed - what a lot we learn on this bus)

beaches35 days A/F you have achieved so much. Know you won't get back on the hamster wheel .One day is a blip.
Forget it and carry on.
I am on day 2 and the WW is wearing me down.

Now, who else can I tie up with lights?