Hi all, I'm hoping someone might be able to help me with some advice...
My dd is 17, and she is clever, funny, kind, popular and so bloody different from me it's scary.
The issue I have is I don't know how to relate to her anymore, she's not a child, but not an adult, she is quite a 'young' 17, and is very studious, always enjoyed school, and learning, and is at a top college, looking to go to uni.
I'm nothing like this, hated school, left with nothing much worth talking about, and have generally mooched my way through life.
We have just had a weekend away, me, dd, ds11 and oh. Ds11 adores her, yet she just won't give him the time of day, she brushes him off. I don't know what to do with her, as in, we went to a theme park on Saturday, and she just didn't want to be with us, I think that's what I'm struggling with the most,the fact that she doesn't want to spend any time with us at all...she said she felt sick, all weekend, until we decided to come home, then she perked up.
I have to admit, she and I are not really suited, personality wise, and i realised this weekend that we will probably not have another holiday with her now..
I struggle to communicate with her, I miss her, I miss her needing me, and although we have an excellent uni in our town, which apparently is the best one for what she wants to do,she wants to leave home and goto uni elsewhere, so I guess I feel abandoned.
I seem to have a better relationship with ds as he is more like me, and we can enjoy time together, whereas time spent with dd is hard work, I struggle with her...which is hard to admit.
I AM very proud of her, Very proud, and I would never ever hold her back in what she wants to do.
I love her dearly, but struggle with the fact she's 17!! I was very ill when she was 18 months old, and this illness changed my life, leaving me disabled, and I feel I've missed outon a lot of her life due to this.
Please don't read this and think I don't like her much, as I do, but I find her hard work...she is soooooo intelligent yet struggles with common sense and it's exasperating at times.
I'm not even sure what I'm asking for, I just needed to write it down!
I think it's the transition from school girl, child to student and adult I'm really struggling with.
Thanks for reading my epic post!!