Anti-depressants for a broken heart?

[whyme32]

That's it really. Can't elaborate as it's too upsetting but I've been recommended by a professional to go on AD's but would prefer to get myself back up and running and hate the thought of AD's. Anyone else been here?

Sorry you're having a sad time. I am a firm believer in "whatever gets you through" a hard time when you struggle to function normally. If you're depressed as a result of a broken heart, anti depressants may be the way to go.

Do things that absorb you and take you out of yourself... I don't want to sound like I am minimising the pain you are feeling, but I thought back to the last time I had a broken heart and for me it was practising massage, devouring fiction books, getting back into drawing (went to life drawing classes)... for others it could be gardening, restoring furniture, creating something beautiful.

for you.

When you are sad for a prolonged period or just incredibly sad, it knocks your brain biochemistry for six. So it becomes physical - ADs help to put that chemistry back on track. You would probably need to be on them for about 6 months but they will put you in a place where you can deal with all the emotions and practical shite that you need to. You wont be addicted as they are not addictive these days. You can then do all the things that babyseal has suggested, it might feel too much just now.

IF a professional has recommended that you go on them, i wouldn't advise that you do what I'm about to write below until you have spoken to them. That's very important and I cannot stress it enough.

Depending on your particular type of depression, there is a lot of evidence to show that eating a good diet and taking regular exercise can achieve just the same results as ADs. It's not just the endorphins, but better health means a body better able to sleep and to handle stress hormones.

Sometimes, however, you need the ADs in order to take away the distress enough to allow you to put that exercise and diet plan into motion.

Hope you feel better soon.

ADs can be a good short-term aid but, longer-term, things like exercise, good diet, getting out into the fresh air daily, meeting new people, doing new things and, yes, having sex with a new person are probably far better at helping you get past where you are now and moving on to live a happier life.

We so often get caught in the loop of thinking that an ex partner was 'the one' when there are probably several hundred million 'the ones' out there for us. Going out, meeting new people, mixing with new people of the opposite sex, etc, is probably the best way forward.

So if you have been advised to take the ADs then you need to really think about doing so - they will help in the short-term. But, long-term, you need to get back out there and realise that there are loads of other people who would love your company.

Unhappiness is not the same thing as depression, although the former can lead to the latter.

Try this -- it's not a diagnostic, but might help you get your fears in perspective:

www.nhs.uk/Conditions/Depression/Pages/Symptoms.aspx

My own twopenn'orth: Doctors over-diagnose depression, partly because of blunt diagnostic tools and partly because unhappiness is *for some reason) socially unacceptable.

I speak as someone who has been on and off anti-depressants for years.

Your mind may vary.

OH good grief, take them!

ADs took the edge off how I was feeling that meant I could do the stuff like eat healthily, exercise, spend time with friends, develop new hobbies... all the things that make the difference in the long term.

But I really was in a position where I'd stopped functioning and was struggling to feed my children and get them into school every day, etc.

I was put of diazepam and still taking them daily to help calm down but times they just make you feel like a zombie, and no thoughts or emotions. help me sleep which was already hard

From someone who suffered from a broken heart in the past 5 months my honest recommendation is no. Someone said once:

"In order to reciprocate love, you gotta notice it, gotta recognize it, gotta feel it first. Gotta be let inside it, feel its hurt and then kneel to its worst. If you contain it, don't hide it, gotta reveal it first and when you think you hit rock bottom, gotta feel it worse."

I believe in this so much. Sometimes you have to hit rock bottom to almost be reborn learn so much lessons. I think anti depressants just mask the deeper issue. My advice would be to go back to the gym, hang around friends, put yourself into your career, go on little breaks, do some counselling, join clubs (meetups is great!) and slowly but surely the pain does lesson. I lost the love of my life in May as I honestly wanted to die but it does get better. I hated when people told me that but it does. Chin up xx

If your like me and suffer from obsessive thinking about the
other person than I say that you should take them! There non addictive and
believe it or not this is day two and already I've stopped hurting and obsessing.
When I'm obsessing then I'm not about to function or concentrate on other things!

Tell us why you are reluctant to take ADs? That might help us advise you.

I resisted them for a long time, despite having very physical symptoms of clinical depression (alongside exercising a great deal already - though not eating well at all).

In the end I accepted them to show that I was accepting the help I was being offered, and having done some research into the issues I was concerned about.

8 weeks in and I still don't know whether they're helping. My personal situation is different to yours so I can't comment on that.

I was discussing this with my psychologist recently as I've been having a tough time. She said that in her experience the ADs do help numb the sad feelings but also dampen down the good feelings so less pleasure from the good things in life which sounds kind of counter productive.

Also, a relationship breakdown is a form of bereavement and we are entirely normal to weep, lose sleep and feel bereft. However, if this goes on for too long and we don't have good support then you can tip into clinical depression. Then meds might help but so do all the other things listed above. GPS don't have much to offer which is why they are quite quick to prescribe.

Do you have RL support to help you through?

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