My daughter found a man in my bed :s

[TrulyTerribleMother]

I have really really screwed up. Namechanged obvs.

I'm a single mum. 2 DD, the youngest is 9.

Been seeing a lovely guy for a couple of months, but not at the meet the children stage yet, although I'm fairly sure this is a good thing and that will happen eventually.

My childcare arrangements this weekend were that the DD stayed with their dad Fri night, dropped off Sat morning at 10, then were being collected by their friends mum at 10.30 to go on a day out and a sleepover.

Lovely chap and I decided to start our weekend early, so he stayed over Friday night. I thought it would eb fine, I got up to sort the kids out in the half hour window with them, he'd stay quietly in my bedroom, they are none the wiser. I know.

Naturally, I got distracted and DD9 walked into my bedroom, where lovely chap is in bed, reading his phone. All covered up, no issues there. But FUCK. she walked in, put whatever she was returning down, gave him a big smile and walked out, closing door behind her. AND SAID NOTHING. He tried to text me to tell me but I didn't pick it up til they were gone.

She does not appear to be one bit traumatised, but they are due back this evening and I have no idea what to say. Please help?

Sparkly,

You tell me where it says the op should be supported. And while you are at it, tell me where it says people can't offer opinions that differ from others. You can't? Ok, so don't criticise me.

I could have made this so, so much more provocative, I chose not to.

Seriously, ask how the kids were, not seeing Mum for the weekend cos she was too busy elsewhere doing other things.

Yes. I do realise parents have a life too, but does it really have to come in front of looking after your kids?

I am - completely honestly - glad it worked out ok for the kids and the op. Seriously, I'm pleased for them all, but the situation should not have arisen and could have been a lot, a real lot, more traumatic, it was only lucky that it wasn't the case.

At 9 and 14 I think they could manage.

You asked me a question then answered it yourself so I won't bother .

I think the way you post is unpleasant and attacking but keep going, hopefully you'll get banned soon.

Seriously, ask how the kids were, not seeing Mum for the weekend cos she was too busy elsewhere doing other things

Have you even read the OP?

My childcare arrangements this weekend were that the DD stayed with their dad Fri night, dropped off Sat morning at 10, then were being collected by their friends mum at 10.30 to go on a day out and a sleepover

^^^ where does it say the mum was too busy doing other things?? Its the way things just happened that weekend!

Where does it say Mum was too busy doing other things.......?

In the opening post actually. Why do you think the kids were being packed off for a day and a sleep over? Why was the bloke still in bed at 10.30 after staying over Friday night?

So spending the day in bed fucking a new bloke (''doing other things'') is more important than spending time with her kids.

Or maybe they spent the night at the dads on same weekend they were going for a sleepover with a friend? So she planned a seeked with the fella.

Why you think she packed them off I dont know.

Weekend**

Yes, it's what I like to call "Making Shit Up" in order to have a reason to give someone hard time.

Cro your posts on this thread are absolute bunkum, based on situations you have created in your head to justify your usual hectoring and aggressive posting style.

Do you post in AIBU? If not please do, there's loads like you over there so you'll fit right in and most importantly people looking for advice and support won't have to deal with your unpleasant posts.

Great outcome OP [ smile]

I just checked back in on this thread - didn't realise it had gone a bit bonkers

This kids are brilliant, the fella is brilliant, generally and with them, they all seem to like each other very much, and we've spent some lovely times together. He manages to get it absolutely spot on with them and I couldn't wish for more. There seems to be no lasting damage from ManInBedGate.

I'm slightly in shock that it is going so well and have even relaxed a bit.

Thank you to those of you who defended me in my absence - to those of you worried about my children/morals/their father - no need!

Good updates OP.

Your kids sound quite amusing.

The derailing, well, I guess some people get their jollies in rather strange ways.

OP.. You just have to promise not to go apeshit when you find a boy in her room at 17!

Aaaaah I love a good update. All warm and fuzzy

Oh... Rosencrantz... I make no promises

Hahaha! The boy in the bed! I'm sure she admires her sexually liberated mother and will want to copy later on but hey...

Oh I see Cron is back.

sarcasm

Ahhhh darn it wasn't true, never mind.

TTM- glad its going well