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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Can't believe he's doing this!

378 replies

AuchAyethenoo · 18/09/2013 09:26

I posted a last week about some financial issues I'm having with my dp, basically he works full time on a decent wage, I receive CTC, cb and maintenance for my eldest dc. I pay half of all the bills, mortgage etc plus buy all of the food and all of the children's clothes, activities etc, etc. This has, of course, caused major stress for me to the point that my mum takes me food shopping just to ensure we have food in the house for my children.

Yesterday he comes home telling me he has just found out his brother (9 years old) has rattled up a £700 bill on his x-box on his mothers credit card. That she has no money at all now. MIL is on benefits, I suggested she could contact DWP to apply for a loan for food and essentials and perhaps speak to her sons father to arrange buying food for them.

I've now found out that dp has given his mum about £300. I don't grudge his mum help for food, but what I am struggling with is that he has no issue giving his mum money but never has any to give to me for our children.

OP posts:
50shadesofmeh · 22/09/2013 20:32

I hope you are ok Auch

noslimbody · 22/09/2013 20:37

Petrified for you Auch....Sad

SnookyPooky · 22/09/2013 20:38

Fooking hell I am horrified at this thread.
This is one of those times that wish I lived in UK, I want to go to Auch' s house, boot the door in and bundle her and the kids away.
Men like this make my blood run cold.

Bogeyface · 22/09/2013 21:07

I think we should all stop posting on this thread.

We know that he is keeping her under very close surveillance, so we dont know that he isnt also monitoring her internet usage.

There is info here should the OP need it, and we dont want to be putting ideas into his head about what she may or may not do that will escalate his abuse.

OP, we are all here for you, please PM any one of use who you feel could help, all you need to do is PM one person and they will contact others (off thread) if they cant help you themselves. Take care, we are with you xx

WorldPeaceAndFreeProsecco · 22/09/2013 22:08

I hope she's out.

MimsyBorogroves · 22/09/2013 22:56

I hope you're okay OP.

If you can, pm someone on here your address and they will phone the police for you.

BellaOfTheBalls · 22/09/2013 23:01

Just read all of this. Scary scary stuff.

All advice has been given. Thoughts with you OP.

TakingThePea · 22/09/2013 23:10

I'm in North West London if you need any practical help

TeaAndSconesTwice · 22/09/2013 23:23

Just read this thread, excellent advice, I hope your out op Hmm

cjel · 22/09/2013 23:30

auch. still wishing you safetyxx

annielewis · 22/09/2013 23:35

North London here if that's near you , I can help you too. X

lisad123everybodydancenow · 22/09/2013 23:41

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TeamEdward · 22/09/2013 23:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

chocoholicanon · 22/09/2013 23:59

What an awfull man, op I am in Manchester and am very willing to help if you're nearby x

DoubleLifeIsALifeHalved · 23/09/2013 03:30

My heart goes out to you. Joining the many mumsnetters who are thinking of you tonight. Take care.

TimidLivid · 23/09/2013 03:58

I'm in livingston if ur in scotland pm me I would help anyway I can

HoopersGinger · 23/09/2013 07:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

IShouldNotBeHere · 23/09/2013 07:57

Hope you're ok Auch.

IvanaCake · 23/09/2013 09:27

I keep coming back to this thread hoping for an update. I truly hope you're ok auch.

KatyTheCleaningLady · 23/09/2013 09:44

Hoopers, that is awesome! I am so glad you are safe now. Thanks

BabylonReturns · 23/09/2013 10:44

Really hoping you're ok Auch

TheOneWithTheHair · 23/09/2013 12:14

Hoping you are ok Auch.

Medal · 23/09/2013 12:25

Thinking of you too, really hope you and your children are ok.

WhereMyMilk · 23/09/2013 12:35

I don't know what to say but this is terrifying. Worcestershire here if help required,x

YoniMatopoeia · 23/09/2013 12:41

Hope you are ok Auch. South Oxfordshire here, if you need help (with 6'6 military husband for backup)

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