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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

MNHQ have commented on this thread

Relationships

Can't believe he's doing this!

378 replies

AuchAyethenoo · 18/09/2013 09:26

I posted a last week about some financial issues I'm having with my dp, basically he works full time on a decent wage, I receive CTC, cb and maintenance for my eldest dc. I pay half of all the bills, mortgage etc plus buy all of the food and all of the children's clothes, activities etc, etc. This has, of course, caused major stress for me to the point that my mum takes me food shopping just to ensure we have food in the house for my children.

Yesterday he comes home telling me he has just found out his brother (9 years old) has rattled up a £700 bill on his x-box on his mothers credit card. That she has no money at all now. MIL is on benefits, I suggested she could contact DWP to apply for a loan for food and essentials and perhaps speak to her sons father to arrange buying food for them.

I've now found out that dp has given his mum about £300. I don't grudge his mum help for food, but what I am struggling with is that he has no issue giving his mum money but never has any to give to me for our children.

OP posts:
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laracroft2001 · 11/11/2013 20:55

Hi

Just wondering if Auch ever updated? I followed the thread for a while and was quite worried

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GuybrushThreepwoodMP · 02/10/2013 07:05

I think some of us feel that it may be better to let this thread move down the list and allow Auch to make contact when she is able rather than filling it up with bumps. If there is a possibility that her OH did find this thread then we need to let it die.
She knows we are here and she knows we care and at this stage we just have to hope she is ok and that she updates us when she can. There's no point in doing anything else.

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DownWithThisSortOfThing · 01/10/2013 23:13

Bump xxx

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RegTheMonkey · 01/10/2013 10:26

Still thinking of you.

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Altinkum · 01/10/2013 07:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mammadiggingdeep · 30/09/2013 23:09

Bump....wondering about you op. xx

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MadameGazelleIsMyMum · 30/09/2013 19:18

Hoping the OP is ok.

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honey86 · 30/09/2013 18:28

bump x

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grapelovingweirdo · 30/09/2013 12:29

Bump. Xx

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catameringue · 29/09/2013 20:45

I keep hoping you'll reappear op. Hope you're ok.

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annielewis · 28/09/2013 22:50

Ahhh, forgot it was 2 weeks. Crap. Hmm

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BillyBanter · 28/09/2013 21:39

He took two weeks off, he's only had one so far.

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annielewis · 28/09/2013 19:04

Bumping, and hoping OP's OH will be going back to work on Monday and she can get back on here for a bit of support if she is still in the house with him..... stay safe Auch
xx

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PosyNarker · 27/09/2013 23:09

Lurker also hoping OP comes back. One of the most disturbing threads I've read on Mumsnet and really hoping OP has got out and is okay.

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grapelovingweirdo · 27/09/2013 22:20

Really worried op. Really worried.

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wewillmendit · 27/09/2013 20:10

Auch, I really hope that you and your dc's are safe.

FunnyRunner, when I was concerned about a poster on a different thread, MNHQ told me that they only have people's e mail, and no way of locating posters.

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KatyTheCleaningLady · 27/09/2013 19:16

I am worried, too. But, I think it's likely that she's changed her mind about leaving/has been talked around and she may just feel embarrassed about it.

OP, if you read this, I want you to know that if you decide to stay and make your marriage work, I respect that and wish you well. And if you need to start another thread in a few weeks or months, nobody will say "I told you so." Few abused spouses leave right away.

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PeanutPatty · 27/09/2013 18:20

I'm hoping the no news is due to laying low, playing the game til he goes back to work. Or she has legged it to her mum's with nothing and perhaps her mum doesn't have wifi or whatever. I sincerely hope she and her DD are safe and sound. I hope he rots in hell.

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DownstairsMixUp · 27/09/2013 13:21

Oh god this thread, i have to go to work in a bit but please PM me if you happen to be in the east kent area, i will do anything to help if you need it. Hope we hear some news soon about you!

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RegTheMonkey · 27/09/2013 13:09

I keep thinking about her too.

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FunnyRunner · 27/09/2013 11:11

Is MN able to intervene in these situations? Contact police with location etc? So hard to know if Auch and kids are safe Sad Really hoping so x

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catsmother · 27/09/2013 11:09

Auch - I hope you're okay, have been thinking about you lots. Please come back only when it's safe to do so to let us know how you are and/or to ask for support/advice/help.

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Auntybella · 26/09/2013 16:50

Bumping to keep this at the top. Hope all is well Auch. Xx

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WafflyVersatile · 25/09/2013 23:19

I'm hoping that she is keeping herself safe and waiting for her chance. For us her logging on here is important because we want to know she's safe, but from her pov it's mainly a risky thing for her to do until after she's made her move.

fingers crossed anyway.

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showtunesgirl · 25/09/2013 23:07

Come back OP! Sad

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