DH has told me that Semen is a cure-all????????

[comewhatmay]

Im a fairly new poster, but have changed my name too.

Basically, he has said that to cure my bad skin, Semen is supposed to be the best remedy. I have suffered from acne for years and years and nothing has helped.

He said that he thinks that it has properties that are good if put on the skin, but also has nutrients that are good if ingested.

Im a little alarmed by this, im not really into kinky stuff, but willing to do anything to help my skin.

Is this true?

Is that why men don;t get them so often then, P ? Splashback 'n all...

LOL @ the mighty Seat, ggg.

lol at this thread...btw what's happened to comewhatmay..?? Think it should now be gonewhatmay..!!!

I must admit Hub I've never cured anyone elses chilblains

I always just use a radiator myself - although I think that's not what you're supposed to do. I'd prefer that to being peed on though I think.

Message withdrawn

Well did we ever listen to what was good for us?
No!
That is why we are all here
Children - the one thing we were told to avoid as it was bad for your health.
Now someone tried to tell me alcohol is bad for you
I'm also ignoring that nugget...
I find it dulls the pain of the former transgression

Hub - Doesn't putting them on a radiator make them itch?

Frankly I'd stick with the acne. This reminds me of all the positive effects drinking urine is supposed to have. It may well have but I ain't gonna do it! At least the wee is your own..

fancyacuppa?

PMSL at hub

"Couldnt he just lick the stamp?"

Hello

Sorry I couldnt return to respond yesterday evening.

I spoke to my DH about the vitamins and nutrients not being true. He said, he thought it would be fine if he took vitamin supplements first?

I said to him about the cunnlingus thing, he said he could only do that after he had been fellated. I ask him what this meant and he said he had to go pop some vitamin pills first......

Will report back later....

If he actually wants to deliver the full medicinal benefit to you, you want to increase the dosage concentration onto targetted areas of skin where you have a particular problem. The best way to target any kind of spray of liquid, as we all know, is to restrict the area it is allowed to escape to - ie. use some kind of pipe / hose. In your case, I would recommend 9mm aquarium piping, and dh should carefully connect about 30 cm worth of pipe to his man-eye, which he will do if he really cares about your complexion, and then direct this - at any particularly opportune moment - towards your problem area. I see this being a win-win for both of you.

Very best luck. With my suggestion he will not need to pop any vitamins.

Wrt this fellation lark, I sugget you go find a banana in your kitchen, peel it, and then, very carefully, use your incisors (the front ones) to make a really pretty pattern quite deep into the banana flesh. After you've done that, withdraw it, admire your handiwork, then reinsert and TAKE A BL00DY BIG BITE, really hard, so your banana is cleaved in two. Now, when you are with dh later tonight, repeat THESE EXACT SAME MOTIONS and you will both be in heaven.

LOL hub - you are on form tonight

Oh hells bells, pmsl. Weak with laughing Somebody help me.
Thank heaven for little trolls.

Why thank you your maj. One must always help the community when one can.

yes, do report back later, you-who-cannot-spell-'cum'.

we all find you mildly amusing.

for now.

pmsl hub

Piff, I'm ROFL at "it is however an open invitation to haemorhoids." for some reason - I love it when a phrase has perfect comedy cadence!

Along with I'd rather have kids than haemorrhoids.
Oh yeah like the two are mutually exclusive after all.

and comewhatmay do not fall for that old chestnut, after he has been fellated, honey he is going to sleep.
Fast...

Good one Hub

I get the sore throat line too...still after all these years. 'Wanna suck on something'.... Oh ha, ha... it's still not funny.

BTW. Eating melons is supposed to make semen less disgusting apparently. And avoid curries and alcohol...fat chance there on a Friday night....

I just have to thank all the posters on here - best laugh I've had in ages reading this thread!

When heavily pregnant, I suggested regular sex with DH to 'induce' labour - he tried to tell me that the semen would be more successful if taken orally! Not sure if it's true but figured it wasn't the time for me doing all the work so I convinced him that me achieving multiple orgasms would be even more successful! I got to lie back and enjoy (till labour inevitably started that is!)

The best thread!!!

I have also heard the one that balls can explode and cause fatality if not satisfied. This was when I was a teen! No wonder he disappeared back then! !!! Ha ha

hub2dee seems to have took much experience of this topic... Anything you to tell us about "wifedee"..??? .!!!

great thread.
Havent laughed so much for ages!
Dh say she thinks we are all disgusting!