Long story short, I met a female friend a 5 years ago while I was in quite a 'wild' phase of my life. I partied a lot, worked hard, had a few ONS but emotionally and health-wise, I kept myself very safe.
When she and I met she was (bizarrely) impressed by what she perceived as my glamorous lifestyle and having had no previous sexual experience at all started to do what she thought was the same thing. The only problem is that her interpretation of what she thought I did was not right, and she became like an out of control, emotionally immature teenager.
A few examples: She did and still does drink to the point she passes out four nights out of seven, with no recollection of what she has said or done before that point. She does not use contraception with men she has ONS with, she sleeps with married men and it has become a challenge for her to seduce them, she takes drugs (cocaine, MDMA, LSD, ecstacy) she quit her job because it was interfering with her party lifestyle and became dependent on me and others for money, she has hysterics if she is not the centre of attention or the centre of any man's attention in a room, she has slept with nearly all of mine and my now DH's male friends making any social gathering quite uncomfortable.
I have been her emotional crutch for a year now and I have no clue how to extricate myself. Also since the beginning of our friendship I have met and married my lovely DH, who she irrationally hates and is rude to , despite the fact that he and I are practically paying her a salary each month to keep her alive and eating (her parents are dead.)
When I confront her about her attitude and her lifestyle she tells me I am a hypocrite now I'm married because I did "exactly the same thing" when I was single. This is not true. I made sure I had a good time when I was single, never took class A or B drugs (only ate hash brownies), never slept (knowingly) with married men, never drank to the point of passing out. My head was always firmly on my shoulders and I did not approach the independence of my thirties with a teenagers view of the world. I had, had boyfriends before, had drunk alcohol before, understood my own limits - but she does not understand this.
She is now threatening to "expose" information about me to my parents and to my DH. DH and my parents would be very upset if they found out I had even eaten hash brownies or had a ONS with a married man (I did not know he was married until afterwards, after which I stopped all contact.)
Her drinking is getting, worse, her drug-taking is getting worse, her emotional state is becoming terribly negative (she "hates" all men and treats them with contempt) she's depressed, jobless and will be homeless in 3 months and is asking if she can come and live with us.
I am totally confused. Am I acting like a smug married now? Do I sound really patronising and like a total hypocrite? Is it normal for someone to misinterpret someone else's life based on what they see and then re-enact it in their own way, then blame the other person for being a bad influence?!
Any advice on what I should do?