Does your partner tell you what to wear?

[violet123]

I recently went shopping with my boyfriend to buy some pyjamas. I wanted a light top to wear in the hot weather so chose one which was a bit see-through. My boyfriend basically told me not to buy it, as it was inappropriate (even though he will be the only one to see me in it!) but I bought it anyway. He spent the rest of the day in a bad mood, and when I put it on we had an argument. Should you listen to your partners point of view in relation to clothes or should you buy and wear what you want? Was I selfish and should I have taken his opinion into consideration? Advice please.

Massively un PC but I need my partner to help dress me - I value his opinion

I've not read all the posts yet because this was my immediate reaction

1. No, I do not consult DH on what I buy or wear

1. If DH were honestly stupid enough to take his balls in his hand to venture a negative opinion on what I had bought or worn I'd ignore him.

I like to look good. I know what I look good in. I do not dress for anyone other than myself.

Ever.

This is the face you should be wearing when dealing with a man that tells you what to wear.

iclaudius I don't think there's any problem with that - I ask my DH for his opinion too. But what the OP describes seems different.

I buy what I like, I wear what I like, I occasionally ask df for his opinion on my outfit if I feel a bit ick, he will tell me at random I'm looking good but otherwise he has no say on my clothing.

In our years together I can think of one thing he's said doesn't do me any justice and tbh he was right I looked like a sausage skin

I'd be really angry and actually upset if he tried to 'control' what I buy/wear

It's normal for partners to pass comment on what they do think you look good in, in a "that's a nice dress" way.

I'd say that if anyone was mad enough did go shopping with their partner it wouldn't be too odd for them to say "I don't particularly like that" about something.

It's not normal for partners to tell you not to buy something.

I agree with the many other posts - this would be a red flag for me.

My DH occasionally comes shopping with me and I end up spending more than I'd planned to as he points out loads of things that he thinks would look good on me. He doesn't tell me what to wear, and wouldn't care about pj's at all - let alone sulk over my choice! I will occasionally ask his opinion on an outfit, and vice versa but we are both capable of choosing our own clothes.

He might raise an eyebrow if I was wearing a boob tube, mini skirt & stripper heels to go out, but that's only cos it would be quite unlike my usual style (although I do own all of those, I've never worn them together as an outfit!) and he wouldn't actually say anything as he knows I hate being told what to do.

I've had an ex-bf in the past try to tell me what I should/shouldn't be wearing... hence him being my ex.

I rarely shop with my DP, I occasionally will ask his opinion on something I'm not sure suits me, for instance if I'm considering something different to my usual choices - although I mostly second TSSDNCOPs post.
From your post I'd say your boyfriend is a bit of a twat frankly.
If I asked someones opinion and they were honest, fair enough, I might not like it, but I'd invited the comment. If a boyfriend, unsolicited, told me what I should be wearing he would at the very least get my stoniest stare and me wearing the offending item at every opportunity until he got the message...

Dahlen said, Only man who ever offered an opinion on my choice of clothing turned out to be an abusive fuckwit That was my experience, too.

Yes, a man might jocularly tell you what to wear, but only in a "knickers- off!" sort of way. If you boyfriend was being serious, please get rid now. He has some weird, warped ideas about women. Something being too revealing in BED?! Is he actually even straight?

I had a boyfriend like this once, who used to choose a lot of my clothes for me and be quite scathing and insulting about things he didn't like (pink/red, sparkly, girly, tight). I didn't realise quite how much it hd affected me until we broke up.

My DH has opinions on what I wear, sure, but totally respects the fact that I can (and often do) choose to ignore them. He would never criticise, demean or sulk. Most of the time he just tells me he thinks I'm gorgeous, as should your BF.