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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

It is 4 years ago today

10 replies

PasswordProtected · 09/06/2013 20:11

since toyboy and I first slept together. He says he is crazy about me, but he has obviously completely forgotten. Is this a man thing? I do feel somewhat upset.

OP posts:
VulvaVoom · 09/06/2013 20:30

Eh? You're expecting him to remember the first shag? And to celebrate it like a wedding anniversary? Bit odd. But tell him if you're upset.

Futterby · 09/06/2013 20:32

Agreed... An anniversary, I understand but the first time you shagged him? Who does that...?

C999875 · 09/06/2013 20:56

I can remember the dates although do I dare say not all the names of everyone I have slept with and believe me I have not lead a sexually sheltered life!

I wouldn't be upset I don't think many men probably wouldn't remember the dates they first slept with someone xxx

Alibabaandthe40nappies · 09/06/2013 21:02

Are you serious?

Thurlow · 09/06/2013 21:05

I have been with DP for twelve years now. I have no idea when our first date was, let alone our first anything else.

Is this the date you usually use for your anniversary, so he's remembered the past 2 anniversaries but forgotten this one?

noisytoys · 09/06/2013 21:10

I can't even remember the date me and DH got together. If it wasn't the day before my brothers birthday I would have no hope.

And I rarely remember what year DD2 is born because she is 2 years younger than DD1, but 3 calendar years younger (2008 / 2011) so it always throws me. And I'm a woman!!

JennaRainbow · 09/06/2013 21:13

I don't know a single friend who would remember when they first slept with a long term partner let alone celebrate it like you would an anniversary. I've been with dp six years and it must be the least significant date to recall, wouldn't have a clue!

I really would try to not let this bother you, unless as Thurlow said you always celebrate it.

Original poster
PasswordProtected · 10/06/2013 07:10

Wow, didn't realise I was so strange. It wasn't our first date, that was in 2006 & I don't remember the date other than that it was in August.
I suppose it is "only" significant for me because it was the first time after being widowed some years earlier.
I will forget it now, as clearly I am in the wrong.

OP posts:
tribpot · 10/06/2013 07:43

It has significance to you, so why not remind him of it? I'm sure it will put a smile on his face too.

But as a date that he 'should' remember - er, no.

JennaRainbow · 10/06/2013 08:46

As this is the date that means a lot to you then do tell him. You're not wrong to remember it, it's your relationship. Everyone has different things that are significant to them. Do you always celebrate this date as your anniversary? In which case it's of course totally understandable that you're upset he forgot. It means more to you then other people because of what you've sadly been through, so do remind him. I'm sure he'll love being reminded of it x

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