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Original poster

Sexual Fantasies, should you share them with your partner?

87 replies

BeetrootOldDeer · 26/05/2006 10:51

Having a chat with a male mate last night and he reckons that we should all share out sexual fantasies with our partners. Infact men will usually fancy one of our mates and we should allow them to admit this. And this will bring out a wonderful side and excitement.

I said that I really don't want to know that he fantasies about shagging my best mate form behind. I would not mind if he had fantasies about Nicole Kidman but not my mates.

What do you reckon???

OP posts:
Blu · 26/05/2006 10:54

All sounds great in theory, but in practice, I'm with you, Beety.
Or at least depends on what people like. Some men like women fantasising about people they know...I suspect that fewer women feel the same about their dps.

SnowBoo · 26/05/2006 10:57

Well if he fancied any of my friends he would need therapy! Nevermind adding excitement! The only fantasies we share are about us together.

Original poster
BeetrootOldDeer · 26/05/2006 10:57

He was an actor btw Blu, enough said!

And my age but not in a serious relationship, no kids etc.

OP posts:
SenoraPostrophe · 26/05/2006 10:58

what are men like??

stupid suggestion imo.

SKYTVADICT · 26/05/2006 11:01

I def wouldn't want to know if my DP was fantasising about my friends. I'm with you on this.

I also wouldn't tell him if I was fantasising about his!!

alexsmum · 26/05/2006 11:01

no no no no.

if it doesn't cause a row it stops them working(the fantasies)

Blu · 26/05/2006 11:02

Enough said!
Yes, lying in bed improvising his lust for another woman would explain his single status, I think!

SnowBoo · 26/05/2006 11:03

Again, looking at HIS mates, i would be too ashamed if i felt even a little bit of desire for them! He is the best of the bunch (thnak god!)

Now, my ex neighbour, thats worth a little thought! Grin

sobernow · 26/05/2006 11:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Marina · 26/05/2006 11:04

And how long has this gorgeous specimen been single I wonder beety Shock

Original poster
BeetrootOldDeer · 26/05/2006 11:04

yes, but he insisted that my sex life would be the better for it. to allow my man the freedom...not sure where he has formed his opinion about my sex life from..(maybe i look like a frigid old cow)

OP posts:
Marina · 26/05/2006 11:05

"I love me, I love me, I'm mad about myself"

I think we would quadruple the number of bums on seats in my library if we interspersed full length mirrors amongst the bookshelves...

Original poster
BeetrootOldDeer · 26/05/2006 11:05

pmsl sobernow

OP posts:
dinosaure · 26/05/2006 11:06

Do you think he fancies you, Beety?

Marina · 26/05/2006 11:06

The last snap I saw of you beety you looked nothing of the sort Shock
Who is this nong...

Original poster
BeetrootOldDeer · 26/05/2006 11:06

phew i am glad I didnt ask dh last night....

OP posts:
Original poster
BeetrootOldDeer · 26/05/2006 11:08

he actually is a good mate. he had had a couuple too many guiness. (what is the plural of guiness?) and i sent him a text this morning to say dh fantasised about him!!!

OP posts:
TambaTheDragonSlayer · 26/05/2006 11:09

I would hate him to tell me he fancies any of my rl friends (although he has called a couple of them cute or shaggable but only in a joking way, still dont like it much though!) but then I say to him that people are cute too, like his ambulance motorbike driver friend. We are very open with each other about fantasies and stuff but I much prefer it if he fancies someone he could never have, like a film star then to someone he sees regually.

sobernow · 26/05/2006 11:10

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

expatinscotland · 26/05/2006 11:11

I reckon he's a twat, Beet.

B/c twats never stop to think, 'It's okay to feel or think this, but you know, as an adult, I should probably think about how it might hurt my mate's/partner's/mother's, etc. feeling if I just blurt everything out and expect them to deal.'

As Oscar Wilde once said, 'Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live.'

Bugsy2 · 26/05/2006 11:11

My ex-H used to insist on telling me those of my friends he could "go there" with. Have to say I never found it a turn on!!!!!
I love sexual fantasies, but I want them to be about me & my partner/lover/husband - not him & some other woman. That's no fun at all.

Original poster
BeetrootOldDeer · 26/05/2006 11:23

i think he was jelous because i told him i had a crushon oneof his mates

OP posts:
NotQuiteCockney · 26/05/2006 11:27

Ugh, I had an ex who lusted after a friend of mine. Was most tiresome, even though I knew he wouldn't leave me for her, or mess around with her behind my back.

CarlK · 26/05/2006 11:28

I agree that sharing sexual fantasies is a good thing. sharing thoughts about friends of your partner/pirate noisesWink etc,is not that good and idea tho' unless your partner indicates they would also like to explore the idea as fantasy.
sharing fantasies can be very rewarding when the fantasy is mutual. when its not mutaul it can backfire badly.

motherinferior · 26/05/2006 11:30

It would certainly not improve sub-duvet relations in the Inferiority Complex.

I mean, my friends are gorgeous and any bloke with any sense would fancy them, but there are, you know, limits.