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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Dating thread 55, everyone welcome!

999 replies

lubeytoobooby · 31/05/2013 13:19

Woop! Lubes is BACK :o

newbies, daters, those taking a break, online dating real life dating or otherwise, and the loved up.... all welcome!

Off we go -chit chat away.

(I might even dip a toe back in myself)

OP posts:
Pomegranatenoir · 31/05/2013 20:09

My children are young - 4 and 14 months.

Not quite sure I qualify for dating though as my love life is pretty non existent!!!

oopsadaisymaisy · 31/05/2013 20:26

Pome, why wouldn't you qualify for dating? Do you get any free time?

Pomegranatenoir · 31/05/2013 21:45

I work full time but try to get nights out when I can. Struggling a bit at the minute to get nights out sorted. All my friends are coupled up (which equals busy!) and I don't seem to meet any decent men online. I must be doing something wrong!!!

Think I could do with a profile check if anyone fancies helping out...?

How about you oops?

oopsadaisymaisy · 31/05/2013 21:52

I work full time too and have the problem of having next to no childcare but do attract some men who seem ok and the odd one that's not ok. I was invited out by 3 men this weekend but no childcare. It's shit but that's life. Do you have family, what about dad?

I'm a big fan if a sparse profile, use the word fun at least once and if you want those who are serious be clear you're looking for a relationship. There are lord if nice men out there. I've yet to meet him but I'm sure we will find someone.

Pomegranatenoir · 31/05/2013 22:07

Their dad has moved quite far away and only sees them every fortnight. Can't see that changing either.

Might give the sparse profile a go. Need some new pics too. I get lots of complements on my pic and profile bit none of them are off men I would like to date. It is soul destroying at times!'

Well done to you on getting 3 dates. That's brilliant. Childcare is tricky for me too. It's hard to balance what is right for children by what is right for mum. I feel your pain!!

JulietteMontague · 31/05/2013 22:07

Ranger we all have the 15 yo inside us. What you do about it depends on whether you think it's because of your own past experiences or something to do with him. If it's a gut feel that something isn't right from signals you're picking up then yes, be alert. But you say you think it's coming from you. I know it must be difficult to trust again but like I said recently most men don't cheat. Do you have any reason whatsoever to think he's cheating? or is it that you think he's going to turn around and vanish completely (this is my own personal hell of choice), or 'dump' you, or run away because you've slept with him? Any of these are possible, none of these would be a reflection on you or your having slept with him. It's the risk you take when you get involved with someone and most of the time, the other person is oblivious to our private hell because nothing is going on.

You are having some great sex and other good times and that's to be celebrated. What will be will be, people behave as they want to for their own reasons and no amount of fretting will change that unless you start some proper stalking. Meanwhile you channel insouciance, keep your radar tuned and try to relax into it (yes I know, virtually impossible but whatever) Grin

mercury7 · 31/05/2013 22:26

most of the time, the other person is oblivious to our private hell because nothing is going on

well said Juliette:o

but it's very hard not to keep wandering into the private hell...that labyrinth of tortured irrational speculations

ike1 · 31/05/2013 22:49

Does anyone else like the smell of their own feet? My STINK! I have been uphill gardening all day and am enjoying the fetid waft as I sit here typing.....

ike1 · 31/05/2013 23:15

That's a resounding NO then.....

KinNora · 31/05/2013 23:20

No, I don't and I'm getting worse about feet as I get older. Shudder.

ike1 · 31/05/2013 23:28

Lol ....maybe its just mine then that are particularly aromatic ...

KinNora · 31/05/2013 23:32

Do you enjoy your own flatulence too, you mucky pup ?

Snapespeare · 31/05/2013 23:48

came home, felt a bit weird about leaving DS home alone, but had lovely evening & might acquired some photographs for 'personal use'. Blush

If he ever dumps me, keep a close eye on my Facebook. Hmm

ike1 · 31/05/2013 23:52

Heh heh I Do actually Kin! Snape I dont need photos I have my own delightful fragrances to turn me on....

T2710 · 31/05/2013 23:59

Well you probably wouldn't have been able to relax if you'd stayed snape. Glad you had a good evening.

I have upped my game on Pof and actually sent a message to someone!! I've got a few on the go now, which is distracting from my slightly bruised ego from Thursday (even though it was clearly for the best). Should have a few dates lined up for the next couple of weeks!

ike1 · 01/06/2013 00:24

Back to messaging Mr Beard...he seems like a super guy ....might have to find my way around the beard...

Bant · 01/06/2013 01:23

Shitty day. My boss shouting for most of the afternoon, followed by a 3 hour delay at the airport on the way back to england, get home to find the decree nisi in the post.

Still, I get the next few days with my DC. Makes up for it, almost.

No dating news.

KinNora · 01/06/2013 06:47

Sorry you had a crap day Bant, not that saying that helps you very much but the sentiment's there. Have a lovely time with your children.

Snape I'm wearing my intrigued face.

Ike and you look like such a charming, dainty young woman.
Beardy is the ZZ Top bloke, right ?

T27 that's good news, I hope the dates turn out to be great.

Morning everyone, it's too early, me no likey.

Kirstywirsty · 01/06/2013 07:49

ike is uphill gardening not something else altogether??? ;)

Djangounhinged · 01/06/2013 08:14

Hello new thread Smile

Not much to report here... Broke contact with the chap I was supposed to meet last night, as a bit of googling revealed that he had told a heap of lies and was at least 10 years older than his profile said....

On your good advice I favourited and messaged a few nice looking men on POF, have a couple of wee chats which came to nothing.... But a few very flirty messages from a very handsome joiner. Hoping we might meet up this evening cos I'm free soon!

And if that fails I've got an interesting looking plumber to message with. As someone who said she was looking for someone with a degree, I'm quite surprised to be going round all the trades like this!!

Happy dating to those of you off out this weekend Smile

Secretservice · 01/06/2013 08:20

I'm back, literally and figuratively Grin

You lot move on so fast, half of you here now will never have heard of me, and to the others I might, at best, sound vaguely familiar!

But I need a stern talking to, and where better than here!

I have a date today!!!!! And I'm far too excited

It's the first since the amazing disparu, but I appear not to have learnt my lesson and need some cold water thrown in my face, or the application of a wet fish!.

Especially as he's just texted to say he's looking forward to seeing me!

JulietteMontague · 01/06/2013 08:28

Bant sorry yesterday was bad, the boss shouting meh, but the divorce has to have felt awful even when you know it's coming. Divorce doom is to be expected though, I'm sure it will shift once its all done. Meanwhile DC days ahead and (hugs).

JulietteMontague · 01/06/2013 08:33

django that's pants but well done you for catching and dumping.

secret hello! you'll find the fish is still on my profile but a bit of excitement is a good thing, yes? Grin

Talking of which, five sleeps Wink

Secretservice · 01/06/2013 08:43

Excitement is good, Juliette but look what happened last time I felt like this! Moderation is not my friend at the moment.

Thrilled at you and Dutchy, it's reading about yous two, Nameless, Rocky, Mr Nice and any other loved-ups (or as close as dammit) that has hep me going - that there some good uns out there and it's time I got mine!

OhWesternWind · 01/06/2013 09:13

Sorry, not been very postative recently, feeling a bit low and discouraged for no particular reason and didn't want to put the thread on a downer maaan.

Off out tonight with potentially very good bloke, overwhelming feeling is why bother because it will just be another one going nowhere. I am going to bother, though - maybe this time? I think he's getting a bit carried away and needs the fish, have tried to tell him I'm not going to be the same as the person he's imagining, but it's his first date and he's all starry-eyed and over-excited.

I knew you couldn't resist a good beard Ike! But I'm with Nora on the foot thing. Bit of fresh ordinary sweat is ok but not horrible foot sweat!

Django good googling, better to find out now. I am going to google people in future - googled LM recently which I'd not done before but I was being sad, and found out something absolutely shocking that has knocked me for six. I am well out of it. Hope you get to meet up with the joiner.

SS course I remember you! Loads of luck for your date!

Pom more than happy to look at your profile but won't be til Monday as my PC at home is broken and my phone blocks dating sites ... I go out once or twice a week, get babysitters over. Hasn't had any ill effects on the dc I hope.

T sounding good.

Bant nothing like an overheated tirade to round off the working week - silly sod. Getting the papers is bound to be a difficult time, unsettling, even though you know it's the right thing. Hope you have a wonderful weekend with the dc.

Hello Camper - sounds like a bit of a chat with him is in order. He probably doesn't realise how you feel so better to just say you'd like to spend a bit more time together, and see what happens ...

Nora hope you have a nice half-slip on today, otherwise the sun might shine through your skirt and people will see your legs. Beware.

Miranda fingers crossed it all goes well.

Hello everyone else!