Ok this teacher thing.
He started at the school last Sept and because my DS is being assessed for autism and on an IEP, he booked a meeting with me at the start of the school year, to learn more about my son.
He was a chatty, amenable, loud kind of person so the meeting was very relaxed and chatty, at one point I mentioned I talk fast and "it's a (my hometown) thing", he said he was from the same town too and then went on to say "you know the clock tower? I'm in a flat just above the shops there" which yes, was probably just a normal anecdotal thing to say, but at the time and due to the fact he seemed quite flirty, he touched the inside of my wrist as he made a point, had a general cheeky sort of tone to his voice and attitude, sat very close to me with his knee almost touching mine...at the time, I thought (mistakenly, granted - but everyone can misread things like that!) that he might have liked me a bit more than would have been expected.
After that we did have another meeting he called to clarify some of the issues we'd spoken about previously, and he seemed to be looking over at me a lot at pick-up time (I sit on the wall to the right of the class room door, and he would always look over at me as he unlocked the door) and then things like during my son's school play, my son was sitting about 2 children away from the teacher so I had to look in that direction in order to see my son (and of course I'm watching my child, not the play, as was everyone)...whether the teacher thought I was looking at him or whatever, he did glance in my direction a lot, kept rearranging his papers and looking a bit...flustered - may have been cos he thought I was watching him, I don't know - but even my mum who was sitting next to me, noticed that everytime I looked over at my son, the teacher would suddenly look at him too as if he was following my gaze.
I was on the PTA as I've said (before this teacher started) and in the lead up to the Xmas Fayre a few of us were in school sorting stuff out.
I was asked to go in the PPA room to wrap presents for the tombola so I was getting on with that (which is also where I first 'met' this ta/caretaker, by the way) and it was next to the staffroom with a big window on the outside wall, as it used to be the reception I think. This teacher walked past the window looking in as you do, then backed up, glanced around the room as if looking for something and then looked at me and walked off again. It was weird and caught my attention, understandably. Yes he may have been thinking "oh there's a parent in school), but there are always parents/students/new people in school every day, and I was quite clearly wrapping presents and only glanced up when I noticed him looking in the first time, it was when he backed up again I thought it was strange.
I then had to go out in the playground to the summer house which we were turning into the grotto. It was breaktime, he was on playground duty and stood right by the summerhouse.
I kept getting given things to take out there (not just me) and every single time I went out there, he stared at me as I walked out - the whole time, no break in eye contact from him, until I got into the summer house.
I was in the school hall one time with a load of other parents, stacking up the chairs after some event we had been to, was pushing a pile of chairs over to the other side of the hall and happened to be facing the direction of the door that he suddenly walked in through, he did a double take in my general direction and then quickly went over to the other side of the hall, seemed to be moving a few things around by the piano and then wandered out again, looking back into the hall as he left. He didn't bring anything in or leave with anything, so that again caught my attention.
And it was the summerhouse I was clearing when I said 'dusty stock room' 0 out in the playground, I'd offered to do it as the school were on at the PTA chair to get it sorted - as it was January and still had the 'Grotto' set up in there. It was a big job but everyone else was busy, so that's why it took me almost 5 hours to do it.
I spent most of the time in there on my own, but had to go and wash my hands maybe 2 times, the rest of the times I was 'walking the corridor' - once I went to find some sellotape from the office, they sent me to find the Head so I did that, then I needed the PTA garage key - again from the office and another time needed a dustpan and brush so went to ask the caretaker. I then had to make a few journety to the PTA garage to put the Grotto stuff in there, and had to go through the school to get to the garage.
All genuine reasons to be 'walking the school corridors' but as it was class time, I didn't expect this teacher to also be walking around. He was out of the classroom everytime I was and seemingly not doing a lot. So I passed him, he just seemed very 'aware' of my presence. Like moving well out of my way to let me past and saying "sorry" when he hadn't actually got in my way, very exaggerated in his movements...it's hard to explain but I know what I mean...I wasn't over analysing it, it's just when you're in a situation and someone looks aware/uncomfortable that you're there, then you feel it too. That's all.
I'd go up to the school office (door is near the gate where he would be standing supervising in the morning), glance over at the gate - as I did and still do whether he was there or not, it's just natural - and notice he would be looking over at me, and then he'd quickly look away.
Then I posted my first thread about him, and about a week later was when he started 'running away' - the school driveway is quite long, and I'd be walking my children down, get about 10 feet away and he'd suddenly walk back into the playground...he may not have been avoiding me but it seemed odd as he hadn't been doing that previously.
I put a note in the reading diary for the teaching assistant in Yr1 (no, not this guy I was seeing!) just to let her know that DS 'stims' when reading at home, and if they notice it in school (as that day was reading day) could they let me know and I'll get a sensory aid for him to try and see if it helps. At the end of school, this teacher asked for a word and said he'd done the reading that day, seen my note in the diary and said "very good observation for noticing that, well done" and that he'd given DS a sensory ball to hold whilst reading, and it had helped. He said he'd written a note in the diary too and I could now disregard that.
The note said a bit about DS's reading, then "please come and chat with me in person regards your note, thanks!" so it all seemed like he was fine with me, no problems or awkwardness on his part at all.
Two days later, I did have the issue with homework and spellings and the Head ended up speaking to me, saying that he had complained to her (told you about all that so shan't repeat it) and then a letter went out just before Easter saying he was leaving school, I did assume it was because of me so I asked the Head if I should stop the PTA stuff in case it made anyone feel uncomfortable, she said no it was fine...and "all that I think was just because it was the last week of half term, emotions running high and everyone getting stressed, that kind of thing".
He then left but came back for the parents evening in March, he seemed fine at that - leaning towards me over the table as he did with everyone else - so not sitting way back in his chair looking awkward, laughing, asking if DS had mentioned him leaving and when I said yes, DS was gutted the teacher said "me too, it's been hard having to leave so quickly and not getting a chance to tie up loose ends", he shook my hand at the end and seemed perfectly fine.
A couple of weeks ago I spoke to this ta/caretaker while he was here about the whole thing with this teacher; he said he'd never heard anything, apart from the teacher moaning once that 'a parent' had been complaining about her child being bullied (which was me...I never spoke to him though, I raised it with the teaching assistant for the class as he was away that day) and that he had actually left because he "couldn't cope with the paperwork involved with a school that was trying t achieve outstanding status", he was a "car salesman" which he reckons the Head herself came up with that phrase, he had been off 4 times in the first month of being employed at the school and that he'd gone to a school in special measures as it was in his hometown, but they needed him asap as they were due an Ofsted visit and had to be released early from his contract.
He also said, in response to me telling him the same as I've told you here about his/my behaviour, that "(this teacher) split up with his girlfriend just as he started at the school and was quite cut up about it apparently, from the way you've described it I'd have thought he fancied you, to be honest - rather than feeling awkward around you".
Anyway that's an epic post and not trying to change anyone view, just being honest and explaining it all.