The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Whacking The Wine Witch Round The Chops (With Barry The Squid).

[Mouseface]

Hello, I'm Mouse :)

I'm one of the Brave Babes who's travelling on this wonderful, magical, mysterious Bus, trying to hold onto my sobriety for me, and for my family.

I do drink but thanks to this Bus, I've kicked the vodka addiction into touch and the evil WineWitch has been banished far, far away so I now drink in a controlled manner, One Day At A Time. :)

By that, I mean that just for today, I won't be drinking. Tomorrow, however, I will be because it's a very special occasion. The day after will be dealt with when I wake, and the day after that, the day after etc.....

We're a Bus filled with some fantastic posters, some who drink, some who don't touch a drop ever and some who are on/off drinkers who have lovely warm seats in the side-car, some are hanging onto the roof-rack by the tips of their fingers and trying their best to resist the dreaded WineWitch's charms night after night. But they are trying, and that's all that any of us can do, is keep trying, keep starting again!

So, if you think that you're drinking too much (you probably are) why not come and say hi? We won't bite - unless you ask very nicely, manners cost nothing .

There's lots of seats so pick whichever one you like and have a . Just jump in, we're not a judgemental pack of quiche makers

And here's a bit of light reading for you.... our latest thread and the very first one, the reason we're all here.

PREVIOUS THREAD

FIRST EVER THREAD

[ohcluttergotme]

Today has been hard with my boy on a hangover. Have done nothing in the house, no washing, cleaning. Had McDonalds for breakfast & chips for tea. Just feel exhausted.
A few hours of drinking is so not worth today! x

[dementedma]

Another update, if you all don't mind. Had a long and difficult few hours with Richard today. He has already had two bottles of wine by mid-afternoon. He's drinking 3 to 4 bottles a day. It was very very bad, too long to write here. He wants to die, says there is no point going on. He hasn't eaten any of the foo d I left. He says no-one can help him and that he is frightened he is dying. He asked his counsellor a few weeks ago to be sectioned, but she apparently said that things didn't work like that. A lot of tears, pleading with me not to leave him. A lot of shame, apologies, fear. He's hasn't washed in days, he stinks.says he wants all the voices in his head to stop. Says they never stop.
I will try and get hold of a gp to get him referred to rehab - he wants to go but should he be sectioned? Anyone know anything about it?

[ohcluttergotme]

I would phone your psychiatric hospital & say all that has happened. They will have a crisis team that will assess & can go out to see Richard tonight. I think they would hear that Richard is at risk of harming himself & they can properly assess him.
Huge hugs MA, situation sounds heartbreaking & exhausting for you x

[jango36]

Hi all. Not doing so bad here, made it to day 12 and have had some wine. Very small amount three units?. I am/will stop at this. Just couldnt bear a hangover end of. Am planning to have small amount again tomorrow - then am aiming to have none for ten days or so. It seems there are triggers everwhere, this hot weather being a biggie!.
Ma have you thought about calling out the on call gp for Richard. You may strike lucky and have a good one who will make relevant referals??.

[Mouseface]

Ma - he is in need of serious help and now. He is capable of harming himself and/or others and needs to be in a secure and safe place with the the right support.

Call A&E. Ask them what they would do if he was brought in, there should be a duty psych on call 24/7. Ask and see what they would do should he be brought in via ambulance or if he walked in himself. If he is hearing voices, he is a real danger to himself.

He's having psychotic episodes and he is very scared by the sounds of it. The alcohol will be exacerbating the symptoms and the effects of his condition. Call NHS Direct at the very least...... someone can help you. Him. But it needs to be soon. Very soon.

He should be sectioned but have a read of this - SITE

And this SITE TOO to give you a rough idea of what to do.

Have YOU got any support? You must be utter rung out sweetheart. Have you eaten? Slept? I wish I was nearer to support you.

Talk to whoever you can get hold of. Personally, I think he should be sectioned for his own safety now. It's gone past just drinking...... it's more like suicidal attempts, I'm sorry to say sweets

Big hugs xxxxx

[dementedma]

I'm OK. My sister in London has phoned, as has my brother in York. He is normally very judgemental - thinks Richard is just a pisshead - but sis in London has given him the severity of the situation and he was very supportive. He is off all this week so will come up of needed which is surprising, but welcome. Mum might need him if Richard is sectioned this week.we are united in protecting mum from all of this.I have another sister abroad, but she will do the cats bum face about people who drink too much, so haven't contacted her.
I promised I would take Ds out to tomorrow for a picnic and a castle, so still want to do that but am torn between my two families now. Won't take Richard with us if he is drunk, and risk the DTS taking him sober.Ds will be frightened. But leaving Richard for one more day while I have a nice family day out, might be one day too late....

[greeneyed]

ma tell your bro to come up tomorrow. He IS needed, you don't have to do this alone xx

[ohcluttergotme]

Morning babes, how's everyone today? I just want to write down what 7 hours of drinking is doing to me so that next time I feel tempted I can read back. I know in light of MA's brothers problems mine are very low down but for me they're mine & real.

• yesterday felt like complete shit
  
• had no time, energy or patience for little boy
  
• did no washing, cooking or cleaning
  
• just left my teenage dd to get on with it
  
• been trying to be healthy & ate nothing but crap all day yesterday
  
• woke up today, throat is shot, chesty cough is back
  
• whole body aches
  
• feet are all cut from wearing high heels for too long
  *friend at work posted a video on Facebook of me doing a walkover in a pub after jäger shots....mortified, she's now took it down!
  
• Just don't want to do anything today, so 2 days of no washing.
  
• know there's no way I would of made it in to work today so thankfully Monday holiday & I don't work Tuesdays so got til Wednesday to get back to normal
  
  All this from 7 hours drinking
  
  Anyway wishing everyone a lovely bank holiday Monday, hope you get some sun apparently we're not in Scotland

[ohcluttergotme]

Ha ha just realised that may read like I can't be arsed getting washed, I've had baths & shower! It's no washing of clothes. In this house I have to do a minimum of 1 a day to keep on top of it & did none yesterday & now can't be bothered today! I'm not the stinking the bus up...honest!

[lonnika]

LOL Ohclutter - I did wonder :)

Day 7 for me - DAY 7 Whoop whoop whoop!!!!
Just taken DD to a sporting event - going back later with grandparents and DH to cheer her on. Usually would have got DH to take her as I wouldn't have wanted to got up early to take her.

Anyway today is a lovely day - I just wish I was sleeping more at night :/


One week sober - So pleased with myself :)

[Theala]

Well done lonnika! That's brilliant.

Well, I've had a Saturday of drinking far far too much and drank more than a few glasses of wine last night as well. Not enough to be drunk, but still. No alcohol for me at all this week.

[ohcluttergotme]

Well done Lonnika, that's amazing, go you !
Theala, sorry you've overdone it, it's just not worth it after is it? Good for a while but then the after effects totally outweigh any good. Hope you feel better soon x

[Mouseface]

Morning, tis me, Mouse


Ma, I've been thinking of you all night.

Ma - you ABSOLUTELY MUST ask your brother for help. You are at breaking point sweetheart. You need a break from being the one to go looking for him, you need a break from worrying when the phone rings if it's going to be the police to tell you the worst has happened.

Oh Ma - I'm sorry but please darling lady, please, please ask your brother to come and now. Enough is enough, you've done much more than most because after all is said and done, after all he has put you through, he is still your flesh and blood and you love him. Watching him waste away, killing himself, wanting to die, wanting to leave you and those who are around him must be crushing.

Ma - Please sweetheart. Please get the help that is being offered. Lots of love xxxxx

[lonnika]

2 sporting quotes my dd shared this morning with me
relevant to me (not saying they will be to everyone)

If it is important to you, you will find a way. I f not you will find an excuse.

When everything feels like an uphill struggle just think of the view from the top :))))

[Theala]

clutter It's not, but...I wish I could turn off the part of my brain that says "Get drunk! It'll be fun!" even when I've proven time and time again to myself that any fun is far outweighed by the negative consequences.
FGS, the man I love is seriously considering loving me because of my drinking, and I still think that getting drunk will be fun. What the fuck is wrong with me?

[Theala]

is considering leaving me, not loving.

[dementedma]

Thanks all. Will try and get hold of emergency psychiatric team today if we can't hang on for gp tomorrow. Mum will be back tomorrow and I need to have some positive actions to tell her to soften the blow. Depending on what medical peeps say and where they put Richard, then I will ask John to come up for a few days.
thurso good to see you. We must catch up soon!
All those doing well - well done!
And can I just ask.......where is the fucking sunshine?

[ohcluttergotme]

Lonnika, love those quotes. I remember splitting from my dd's dad & life was tough & I remember my Auntie saying to me the things that are the hardest uphill struggles give you the easiest way down...or something like that!
Theala, I know I know I so hear you. It is fun at first & then your brain tells you you want more & more alcohol & so you are not in any way in control of the situation & then life falls down around you. For me it's the feeling of the next day/days that is a deterrent for me. But this has took me years of trying to control, moderate my drinking. Everyone is different and everyone will have a level (or not) of where they say enough I need to stop.
I couldn't do it on my own & went to my Gp, then alcohol services, this bus, Allen Carr, family. But even then with just a couple of shandies I undid 3 months of feeling great about not drinking. Wishing you well & hope you can reach out for help in real life.

MA there is no sun in Scotland, I think down south are hogging it all!

[Fairenuff]

It's here ma. For once and everyone is out and about in it. Well done on everything you've done so far for your db. You are a wonderfully compassionate and caring sister, he is lucky to have you. I think all the advice you've had here is great and I really hope it's not too late for him.

If it is important to you, you will find a way. I f not you will find an excuse

Lonnika I particularly like this quote - it can be applied to so many things. Well done on one week sober. It's interesting to see the difference in the posts from abstainers and hangover sufferers. Just one more illustration of how it's just not worth it.

I used to think that giving up alcohol would make me miserable when, in fact, it is quite the opposite. It makes me alive, awake, aware, full of energy and capable of so much more.

I do still drink now and again but I don't drink to excess. I don't like those awful hangovers that have been described and the guilt, shame and remorse that can go hand in hand with drinking too much. I had to force myself to stop and learn some strategies but now it's much easier.

Have a good day all. I will not be drinking today

[Theala]

Thanks clutter. I've been to my GP and have an appointment with a psychiatrist for next week. I think I might be depressed as well as drinking too much, or the drinking too much has brought on depression, I don't know. Anyway, hopefully next week's app will start helping.
In the meantime, I shall be drinking a lot of tea.

I hope you can get your brother the help he needs also, Ma.

I used to think that giving up alcohol would make me miserable when, in fact, it is quite the opposite. It makes me alive, awake, aware, full of energy and capable of so much more.
Fairenuff this is where I want to get to. Thank you for showing it's possible.

[jango36]

Hi all checkingin for today .. It's a beautiful day and for that I am grateful :)) but sigh I am gonna be on the side car for today?sigh?.. Partner has really pissed me off today. Don't want to be in same house never mind room as him:(( that's not healthy is it.. Should prob start a thread in relationships really .. I have got so much to be thankfull for but feel this relationship is like a life sentence :(( such a long old story.. Anyone similar ? Prob not :(( ..

[dementedma]

I hope u don't mind another update. Apologies for newbies who may be fed up with this. To cut a long story short, NHS 24 were worse than usual. Got an ambulance in the end. 4 hours in A and E and they sent him home.'psychiatric wouldn't help him, wouldn't see him because he'd been drinking. He was sobbing, banging his head with his hands, pulling his hair, saying "help me. Help me. Don't make me go home". They sent him home. I have managed to get him showered and some food and he is in front of the telly in his flat with a bottle of wine. If he is still alive in the morning we will go to the gp and try and get hold of his counsellor.
There is nothing else I can do. He was right when he said no-one will help him.

[Fairenuff]

Ma if he tells the gp he's been hearing voices and is thinking of harming himself, they will help him I'm sure. Is he drinking to drown out the voices? Is alcohol the secondary problem? He should tell the gp that too if so.