Dating thread no 51

[JulietteMontague]

All tales of online and real life dating here!

evening all, I have been lurking and reading, so much going on with house sale, trying to find a full-time job, negotiating with fuckwit ex, all still going wellbloody brilliant with Mr EA .....I can't even begin to keep up and comment on everything, but ...

Velvet all I can say is C's loss, because we all think you are lovely and it's a shit feeling so ssshhh here's a .

OWW liking the sound of indie, fingers crossed for Tuesday and lots of mildly smutty flirtation until then

Mercury that message, yuck, yuck, yuck

SP get those shoes on and go girl .......

I have just completed an online verbal reasoning test for an job interview I have next week - fuck me! I think they are looking for Einstein not a PA .........its hard to decide if a statement is True, False or Can't Say when you can't even understand the paragraph ...... I must be very thick or it is very difficult

Just the personality test and numerical reasoning to go ......FFS I just want to run an office, not the country

I have a question (especially for the blokes on the thread), based on the players trawling for ONS comments.

So I had a date a couple of nights ago with someone who fits that MO. But it had been a while and I decided I'd decided I needed to shag someone soon when we met up, and I realised we got on, but I was not going to be bothered about seeing him again. He was obviously keen a player trawling for a ONS so I decided to go for it. It was fun, respectful, did the job.

But does he now think he's succesfully "played" me? In my mind it's a mutually respectful but meaningless bit of fun. I like this, if I'm not with someone I'd rather do this then pretend to "date" someone I'm actually luke warm on. But it annoys me that he might feel like he's won some kind of game.

48 I'm really delighted for you -and for your mum!- I think she'll improve as much as she can now that she's back home. Happyhappy!

velvet you are lovely. You're kind and dead glam and very lovely. I will never coffee and cheesecake and when it happens, he's going to be a lucky sod.

wine someone called me sweet once. I snorted at them, but they were actually quite perceptive to dig last the veneer. :)

Stranger I have no idea, but I don't believe every man who has a ons thinks he's 'played' the woman. Looking for a ons doesn't necessarily mean player either. If you feel it was a mutually respectful thing, then it probably was.

stranger why would you care what he thinks?! If he thinks he's scored a player-point by having meaningless sex and you think you've had 'mutually respectful but meaningless fun' then everyone is good, no-one has got one over on anyone else and if they think they have, then that says more about their attitudes towards non committal NSA than your perfectly reasonable and adult attitude.

Busy as an arsekicker at an arsekicking festival at the moment, what with work and revolting teenagers and answering flirty texts - only one of these things is fun - no prizes.

Velvet I'm sorry, I know how horrible this feels. Please don't be extrapolating things from it though, if Cuthbert is too wrapped up in himself and his problems to recognise how fantastic you are, then that's his hard luck.

48 I hope your mum feels much better now she's back in familiar surroundings, I know how difficult it must have been for you all.

SP make sure you have fun tonight.

Tigsy is it a job with MI5 ?

Grrrr
Bloody exes. Bloody money!
Why is it that agreeing access for kids is easy "have them as much as you want" but money is just such a problem!!
Can I ask something. How many of you who are divorced get maintenance for yourself over and above for the kids? And am I being an arse in thinking its unreasonable to ask for it when you have other income and my legal advice says I shouldn't pay any.

I can't decide if I'm feeling like an arse or not.

Thanks

My mum is over joyed to be home. Mum and her partner were almost snogging on the ward last night when he told her she was coming home today. It has been nearly 4 months.

The carers are fab. I know one from school, which is nice.

I am more than happy

Snape, good point re. why do I care. I guess I just dislike the idea of him thinking that I'm kicking myself for sleeping with him too soon and waiting for him to call... Honestly, there really needs to be a secret handshake for respectful but meaningless fun.

bill I only get money for DD .. I believe spousal maintenance is rare these days

velvet sorry about C but he wasn't giving you what you needed anyway so better to clear the way for someone who will ( it will happen)

I met theSalesDirector .. Short and told me all about ailments and hating rollercoasters ( I love rollercoasters ) ho hum .. Next !

stranger but you're not kicking yourself for sleeping with him, so if he thinks you are, hell, more fool him!

bill not being an arse. She needs to hoist it up and get a job if the child maintenance doesn't cover her outgoings, or claim IS/JSA/sickness benefits if she is unable to work because of unavailability/ illness.

Yay!!! I'm really pleased for your Mum, 48, hope it all goes swimmingly from now.

Velvet, sorry about C. You aren't what some men are looking for, but you are exactly what someone is looking for. I hope he finds you soon.

Snape, those scrabble words are a bit of a massive hint to nameless, are they not?

Stranger, what makes you think he'd be thinking that? If he wants to see you again he'll ask, but if he doesn't, I doubt he'd give you a second thought. If he's given you the impression that he'd judge you for putting out too soon, then I'd say you need to think about why you'd bother sleeping with him in the first place. That sounds a bit harsh, it's not meant to be.

Nora and Juliette, you're being mean. And as a brunette 40 something who didn't get a message, I'm now a bit miffed.

Bill I have never had anything but I would consider it reasonable if I got what was due to DS and split any additional major expenses like school fees. It's up to your ex to sort out her own finances. You are not an arse.

Flipper yes Nora and I are the mean girls, the ones who wear their skirts rolled over at the top to make them shorter and have their ties 4 inches long. If you want, you can follow our gang.

Flipper he didn't give the impression he was judgey at all, and to clarify I don't want to see him again (I just wasn't that in to him as they say). I'm being silly, sometimes reading about all the crap that goes on via these boards can give me a low opinion of other people.

I was never one of those girls, I just got told off a lot for being 'facetious' - I know, as if.

Thanks for being kind everyone.

I honestly don't think it will happen for me. It can be no coincidence that the only decent men I've met in the last 5 years have not been in a position to get into a relationship with me.

I've put up a profile even though it's an understatement to say my heart isn't in it. No messages so far - which at least saves me from having to delete them I suppose!

On the plus side, DS2 enjoyed his birthday. So it's not (quite) all bad.

I don't think everyone is being kind, Velvet, we're being truthful and don't like thinking of you feeling unhappy and discontented with yourself.

Velvet what Kin said

Velvet sorry I've come a bit late to the thread tonight. I really hope you're not feeling too low. Although it's not the same, when I was seeing LM and gradually realising that things weren't right and he wasn't feeling/behaving the way I wanted him to, it was awful, really difficult, but it was actually much easier to deal with once I called a halt and stopped hoping and worrying and investing my time and emotions in it. I hope you get some comfort from making your decision too.

I truly think you are wonderful in many ways, not just your looks (and I would kill for even a smidgen of the glamour that you have!) but your intelligence and wit and warm-heartedness. There will be someone out there for you, and he will be equally wonderful. But don't force yourself to get back out there unless you're feeling in the right frame of mind.

Lots of hugs, thinking of you.

I'm not so much unhappy with myself as I am with the situation - I would have preferred that if C had not felt able to embark on a relationship, then at least to have kept on as we were. It's sad, and a shame, and I wish so much things were different. But they are as they are, and wishing won't change that.

Thanks Western . I probably will feel better at some point. Right now, I just miss him, far more than I ever have done before.

And 48!!! So happy for you and your mum. Fabulous news. It's been so long, so many delays, but it's happened at last. Really pleased for you.

SP - no loo update???

Kirsty oh dear, sorry he was a bit blah. (I don't like rollercoasters either but will keep very quiet about that subject on here now).

Bit of nice messaging tonight with Indie. Very mildly saucy, just right. Am also getting messaged from Italy by (you guessed it) the Italian who is having a few days with his family. He is also nice but there's not so much of the shared interests and things in common with him.

Evening!

Had a great night! No drink involved either. Got on great, no awkwardness. We had a good laugh too. Snog when he dropped me back and that's it. Messaging me now too.

I wore flats and hes not exactly tall either which was nice!