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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

Dating Thread 50 .....

999 replies

TigsytheTiger · 07/04/2013 12:28

celebrating half a century of dating chit chat, all welcome ...

OP posts:

Report

OhWesternWind · 07/04/2013 16:23

Ike have you gone? Good luck, hope he's wonderful.

StellaBrillante · 07/04/2013 16:26

Ike OWW - good luck!!!

OhWesternWind · 07/04/2013 16:29

Stella I think it sounds like a genuine mix up, otherwise, like you say, what's the point? If it happens again, though, I'd be very wary. Could it be that he goes quiet when he has his children staying or something?

KinNora · 07/04/2013 16:29

Good luck OWW - go for it ! ( am jammed into corner of tram by evil OAP ) may the dating force be with you

StellaBrillante · 07/04/2013 16:38

OWW - it has crossed my mind on the other couple of of occasions when he went quiet. This time his children were abroad though so no. And not just that but he had finished his pre-mix up msg by saying that he wanted to see me more often - surely, it'd take a pretty twisted type of man...but then again, there are plenty of losers out there!
Anyway, enjoy yourself!!!!!!!

OhWesternWind · 07/04/2013 16:46

Well I am not off out until after tea, have had bath and got the paint off me, done my nails but now I'm having a little lie down. Oh he does seem nice so far. And keen. Just been saying to my cousin that I am never going to run round chasing after anyone ever again.

StellaBrillante · 07/04/2013 17:04

As long as we learn from our experiences...and don't give ourselves too much of a hard time for being accommodating / understanding / patient... we don't have crystal balls and do not read minds after all!

I will be keeping my fingers crossed for you; if nothing else, thumbs up that you will have a great time tonight!

SPsFanjoTheBigStickyHaribo · 07/04/2013 17:04

OWW I'm not a chaser either. Gave up on that a while ago

KinNora · 07/04/2013 17:06

No, OWW, no running around after anyone ever again, for any of us.

I told Software on Friday that I wanted some 'tea' ( i usually say 'dinner' when I'm not with my own people ) and being the posho southern boy he is, he was desperately trying to think of somewhere to take me for a cup of tea, until I explained it to him. I think he's had little or no exposure to northerners.

mercury7 · 07/04/2013 17:14

I did have a look at the 'dating nightmare' blog a while ago, I found it a tiring/boring read after about 2 paragraphs and just couldn't be arsed to plod through it

OhWesternWind · 07/04/2013 17:16

Bit of northern exposure will be good for his soul ... I say "lunch" quite often but do feel a bit poncey saying "dinner". I do say it on here as in "We're going out for dinner" - "'E's tekkin me out fer me tea" doesn't have quite the same ring to it.

KirstyWirsty · 07/04/2013 17:16

Marking my spot .. Still by the pool in tenerife .. Haven't heard from
TheBoy(age 22) since yesterday .. If he disappears I am not bothered ..

Tigsy oi!! I work in IT

StellaBrillante · 07/04/2013 17:23

mercury what is the dating nightmare blog and what was that reference on previous thread about 'do you recognise any of these faces' or something to that effect?

mercury7 · 07/04/2013 17:27

Stella, yes, it's the blog linked to on here

//www.mumsnet.com/Talk/_chat/1725918-Do-you-recognise-anyone-in-these-photos

StellaBrillante · 07/04/2013 17:34

thank you mercury
Goodness me...!

KinNora · 07/04/2013 17:38

He was telling me about his childhood holidays in Norway and Italy, I told him that we stayed self-catering in North Wales every year, then he got himself all bothered and stressed because he said something about 'that must be what working class people did' (just being clumsy) so I took the mickey for a while.

Bant · 07/04/2013 17:52

Right. Time to text CootGirl. I'll go with the 'Had a really nice time, lovely to meet you, but no romantic spark though' message.

Don't know if she felt one, but it's kind of polite I guess.

mercury7 · 07/04/2013 17:54

I also had self catering holidays in North Wales as a child
(of course it was all Greek islands after I flew the nest )

Pomegranatenoir · 07/04/2013 17:57

oww and ike hope it all goes well later ladies! Can't wait for the updates.

Well I'm back from you guessed it - another kids party. Thanks for everyone's messages and sorry I'm sounding a bit grim. If I'm honest with myself my mood has nothing to do with od, it's about my divorce, exh and his new life with ow. It hurts. A lot. I don't want him but it hurts that he has found someone that he is happy with whilst I am bringing up 2 really young (but seriously amazing) children on my own. I would like to meet someone as a distraction but I don't think that will happen any time soon. My life has moved on a lot and most of the time I am happy and smiley and positive. Just when you put the kids to bed at night and think about your life you realise there is a big hole in it. I keep myself busy and I do as many things as I can but it is still there. I really don't want to spend the rest if my life on my own. I am a people person and I want to share my life with someone. Think od isn't right for the time being but it doesn't stop me from plugging away hoping to find someone that I like that likes me too. Makes me sound pathetic doesn't it!

Will start Monday positive I promise!!

Bant · 07/04/2013 18:03

Pom

it doesn't sound pathetic at all. For all of us who thought we'd found 'the one' for the rest of our lives already, then went through the disintegration of that, for whatever reason - it's tough trying to learn from the past and get back to where we already thought we were.

It's not pathetic to want to be with someone at all - that's the human condition. And maybe you'll find someone on OD that will be right for you, some people have and some people haven't. But you're not just sitting home navel gazing and being miserable. Dating itself can be fun if you go into it with a positive aspect and not too many expectations. And you'll meet new people, make friends with possibly some of them, and maybe their friend might be right for you. Who knows.

I'm kind of okay being single. I'm not desperate to find someone. I like spending my time with my DC, working, having some freedom to do what I want when I want. But I want to meet someone to do those things with, cos they're more fun when shared. Doesn't make me pathetic. Hopefully.

48howdidthathappen · 07/04/2013 18:11

Bloody hell. Just caught up.

Have fun Ike and OWW.

Will be checking in for updates

Pomegranatenoir · 07/04/2013 18:13

Kin - how do I see the picture?
Pixie - get back on it
Turnip - he sounds like a idiot. Horrendous thing to do! Next.....!
Bant- thanks. Think I am missing time on my own. I just don't have any and then when I do (at night) I am exhausted! My little girl was ill this weekend so exh was here and that felt odd. I was still in charge of looking after the kids though whilst he did some jobs. I don't even have the benefit of child free time. Ex lives miles away and doesn't see the kids a lot. it is all on his terms. he expects me to do it all and not moan either. Up until this weekend l thought I had reached a stage where I was cool about being single. Appears I haven't quite reached that stage yet. But I know I won't feel like this forever and I am not going to wallow. I'm just having a bad weekend but I will pick myself back up tomorrow.

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KinNora · 07/04/2013 18:23

Pom think it's on my profile but will check to make sure it is.

I echo what Bant said, nothing you've said sounds remotely pathetic, I don't think there are many people on here who don't have awful sad days, when everything just seems like it's completely crap. On top of that, having very young children is very,very hard, god it nearly drove me completely mad, it will all get better, honest and someone will recognise how lovely you are.

Snapespeare · 07/04/2013 18:25

pom. I know exactly how this feels, my three were 5, 2 & 9 months old when I found out their dad had been dicking around on me, I had to nail on a smile and watch him play happy families with the OW & my kids for years. Then he dicked around on her when their son was 9 months old... I used to drive kids 25 miles to his and OW house (he'd lost his licence) and then go and pick them up... It was a long difficult slog full of tears and anger and it was absolutely unfair.

Now, DCs are all teenagers, they're all fab, life is good. You will get there you know, it's just the journey while you're getting there can be lonely. It isn't pathetic at all to want someone to love and companionship and someone to share things with. :) you won't feel like this forever, you're right. You'll get on with bringing up your amazing kids and being lovely and when it's right you'll meet someone who deserves you. :)

ike1 · 07/04/2013 18:36

Right am back....a lovely bloke very intelligent and sincere....but oh no nothing physical at all...what a disappointment...

Flip

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