H not getting on with dd

[npg1]

Hi. Need some advice, its making me miserable.

I have married my new partner. I have 2 children aged 10 and 6. Dd1 loves her step dad, dd2 is going through a funny phase at the moment. She gets upset and in moods easily which really winds H up. He thinks I baby her too much. He says she winds him up all the time, that she is nasty and he doesbt like her. I am finding her difficult at the moment, making me very stressed out too. Both dds have gone through alot of change recently. Their dad has a new baby in family now.

H has just said to me he would rather be at work! He lounges around not wanting to go out and wonders why the kids r climbing the walls.

Any advice please x

Your all very opinionated. I didnt mention those things, no. I did not say I have a newborn to look after nor did I say I found it stressful looking after the baby.

Blah blah blah

Oh and izzy u need to get ur facts right. Re read the post in health section

Hi Npg1 - I'm sorry you're getting all this crap from some people. Izzy - why don't you wind your neck in!

It's not fair to drag up Npg1's post from other threads. That's just plain bullying. Leave her be. She's asked for support and if posters keep abusing her, she isn't exactly going to come back for support, is she?

That's irrelevant OP. You came on to complain about your DD's behaviour pissing off the more important party (to you), your DH. All anyone wants to know here is how you're going to address the unhappiness of a troubled and unsettled little girl.

Care to focus on that?

So how's it going OP? Did he leave? Did you confront him about his behaviour towards your daughter?

You have been trying to conceive a new baby with a man who dislikes your daughter? Are you MAD?

When it comes to children at risk of physical, emotional, and verbal abuse my neck comes out and stays out, cuppatea.

As for 'bullying', it appears to have escaped your notice that this is what the OP's new prize husband is doing to her and to her little dd.

We have had a big discussion about this and I have said its out of order he behaves this way. He said he doesn't hate dd in any way but he finds it difficult to deal with as do I. My dds dote on him so kicking him out right away isnt really the best option when I thinking whats best all round. Do they need another trauma in their lives.

Your out of order to bring up my other posts into this and I have read alot of this relationship thread and most of your answers are boot him out and not try and work it out. I think most of u dwell on others losses.

And thanks uppa for your kind words.

npg1 you have your head stuck in the sand and l feel so sorry for your DD. It is your duty to protect your DC's and having her live with a tosser like you DH is unforgivable.
He seems to have changed his tune when challenged and you didn't back down when he threatened to leave. He would have done you all a favour if he had packed his bags.
I hope you don't live to regret your non action, your DD will not be a child for long but her memories will last a lifetime.

To be fair npg1, izzy only says that in the case of men who are twunts by any objective definition.

I'll be blunt: Your DH sounds like an arse, and if we look at partnership as something that's supposed to enhance the lives of both partners, I'm just not seeing how he enhances yours. You do sound like someone who has to have a man at all costs... But hey, it's your life.

Sorry. X posted with OP.
And there you have it!

Well, the OP is scared, isn't she?

She needs support.

When you're scared, it's very hard to make a decision. The best advice the OP can get in THIS SITUATION is how to tackle her man on his treatment of her DD. Don't drag up other threads - that is just unfair.

I do agree that the children must always come first though.

I absolutely adore my new DH but we do have flare ups about DS's behaviour and it's not easy. I also know that I will always chose DS over him.

OP, maybe let your partner know that the kids always come first and that is your final stance. He takes it or leaves it.

So sorry you are going through this - it is so tough.

You think him leaving would traumatise your little girl, OP? Really? I think she'd remember it as a really happy day.

You shouldn't have to tell your husband to be nice to your child. That's not how it works. He may then be nice to her when you're there, but essentially he still wouldn't like her and she would know it.

I've just read the background to this thread inc the adult network thread last year. Jeeeez, could lose my faith in humanity at times. Those poor kids.

It beggars belief. I actually hope that the child's father gets wind of what's going on. If this was happening to my child and I was the NRP, I would be having some very swift discussions with a solicitor.

Your little dd is acting out because she's unhappy and your response is to pander to a man whose obvious dislike of her has done nothing, and is doing nothing, to alleviate her distress.

Despite being aware she may be feeling dispaced by the arrival of her df's new baby you chose to take on the care of another woman's baby, which has no doubt impacted on the time you have available to meet the needs of your little dd during the current school holidays and at other times when her home is free of the manchild whose presence blights her life.

And this is without giving any consideration to the effect on her of you being so intent on having another baby of your own you've taken fertility drugs and are now on anti-ds because of your failure to conceive.

What message do you think you're giving her?

It seems you've come to this board to garner support through being told what you want to hear. What support does your little dd have and who's telling her what she wants to hear?