love the namechange- about time! 
eurgh sorry for hijack. thanks for sharpening the goats 
No he never sees his son, he wants custody but he used to use him against me, to control me with him and I genuinely felt my son was unsafe. He never gives us a penny. He never has. He doesn't have any positives at all 
but I hoped year after year after year he would change.
I have wasted all day trying to reason with him but think he has some crazy friend and new girlfriend egging him on. He has rewritten history and told everyone a load of rubbish about me, he is adamant I left him because I was having affairs, simply not true. I left because after years and years of helping him he got worse and worse and I was truly terrified. It took me years to have the balls to get out, and I had to remove DS from London entirely to ensure he wouldn't be caught in the firing line.
I've got sooo much work to do I can't concentrate at all
I have contacted a solicitor though but no idea how funding works
He's now threatening to demand money off my mother (which she can't pay, she is a nurse) and failing that he is going to the police again. I have told him to go to the police.
Re career kitty, enhanced CRB checks are needed for medicine and even just as a student. Anything shows up on them, even an arrest, certainly cautions etc.
Made doubly worse by the fact this week is the week DD died some years ago. Just want to hide under duvet.