I miss him

[nutcracker]

At first I missed having someone here but now I actually miss him.

Oh Nutty - you don't, you miss the person you were with to start with. He was horrible to you.

Sorry, hope that wasn't too harsh. x

Not sure about that cos thb I can't really remember what he was like to start with, but I know I do miss him.

I wasn't all that nice to him either you know. Am not sticking up for him but I was horrible too.

nutty - you miss the fact that he's not around. You probably even miss the rows. I missed an ex who cheated on me. I missed an ex who beat me up and worse.

Reality is, I hated being without someone. Took me quite a while to se that I was better off - give yourself time

It'll pass Sweetie. Just keep reminding yourself of all the annoying little things that you can now do to your hearts content!!
I'm in a dressing gown, listening to RHCP loudly(trying to make myself deaf!!) and drinking beer!! My ex would've hated it!!

That is what it was at first Galaxy definatly as I do hate being alone but over the last week or so I have actually missed him.

Am dissapointed when he's not on msn, when he doesn't ring or whatever.

I know I sound pathetic.

It is understandable as obviously he was a huge part of your life & no doubt had a good side as well as a bad one.
It is early days & you are bound to feel down at times, but you have done the right thing & life will get better for you.xx

I knew this would happen. :o Because you had a good day yesterday, you've started wondering if you've made a mistake. Trust me, you did the right thing. You have to try and remember that although you had your good times, a lot of the time you were miserable. If you got back together, how long before you'd be fed up again?

nutty - it's just a phase honey...
Learn to knit :)
It prevents you from wanting to pick up the phone and text lest you drop a stitch...
Honest, it will get better, ride the feelings, it makes you stronger and the one day you will know what you don;t want in a new partner.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

You really don't you miss having 'someone' there - the contact physical and emotional but at the end of the day you need someone positive in your life and not someone who treated you like he did - above all you need someone who has enough respect for you not to treat you like he did.

I missed x's sense of humour long after he wrecked my life!!!

It honestly wasn't because of yesterday, although yesterday was nice.

That really made me LOL Piffle as me not being able to knit is a hot topic in our house as my mum is teaching my girls.

YOu don't sound pathetic. I shagged the ex that cheated on me because we had met up for old time's sake, had a fun lunch and I thought it would make him want me back and realise that he'd made a mistake. Soon came to my senses though and nade sure his dp found out !

I'm not doubting you actually do miss him - but if you sat down and wrote a list of all the things you liked about being with him and all the things you disliked, which would be the longer list?

!

I know I know but there is a but and it's annoying me.

Have you started the list yet?!

oh nutcracker, I am sorry you miss him. It does get easier BUT I know it is not as simple as that.

In my head yeah and your right there are less things in the 'things i liked about him' list.

I still miss him though.

God my mum would self combust if she knew i was saying this.

He's being reasonable at the moment, he's giving you some maintenance, keeping up contact with the kids, inviting you on days out. You're probably wondering if he was that bad after all, maybe you just expected too much, maybe you should have been happy with what you had? The fact is though, that you weren't happy and hadn't been for years. Remember how you felt when he moved back in for a while?

Yep i do but (there's that word again) I looked forward to the day out and not just cos the kids were going, I look forward to speaking to him/seeing him, I was dissapointed when the day out ended.

I am just going off my head i reckon.

Nutty, of course you do, you are still in the grieving process, you are missing the life you thought you would have with him, you are also missing the fact you thought you would raise these kids as a traditional family. (I think), You are also lonely - better to fight with someone than be alone,

Remember - you are now in charge of the remote control, and u have a phone.

U have been through a HORRIBLE time, and you are doing so well.

HUG

I think you're right.

Do you want him to move back in then?

Not going off your head just doubting your decision and that's natural. Are your kids happier without listening to the two of you arguing? Bet they are

No i don't want him to move back in but I think perhaps I would like us to talk properly about things that happened, didn't happen and so on as we still haven't done that. It might reveal to me that I made the right desicion or it might not.

If I decided I wanted him back it would be a long winded thing not a move back in pick up where we left off kinda thing.

My friend suggested Relate but minimum donation seems to be £30 which I/we can't afford.

Actually we didn't argue that much it was more not speaking at all.