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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Told Dh I wasn't happy - now I need advice

81 replies

Mosschops30 · 10/03/2013 21:30

Some of you will know me and Dh haven't had the greatest last year.
He's been disrespectful, lazy, rude etc etc.
My argument was that it was ok because he worked hard, didnt beat me and didn't fuck other women.

We almost separated in a January then decided to have a trial few months. In that time he hasn't said he hasn't said he loves me, we haven't done anything as a couple, still haven't had sex (it's been 6 months now) and no intimacy either.
Tonight I told him I wasn't happy and he's said that I'm looking for something that nobody has, said I'm going to ruin the dcs life just because I'd prefer to be on my own, that I'm needy 'just like my mother', that everyone lives like this and he can't see what the problem is because he's quite happy!

Not sure what to say or do now, really need some opinions and advice.

He is a good father, has started taking to parties etc, started making me tea in the morning, but there is no love, intimacy or respect between us and that depresses me Hmm

OP posts:
cjel · 14/03/2013 17:10

can see cardiff from where I'm sitting am a choc addict I'm afraid?

Mosschops30 · 14/03/2013 22:54

Ok update

He sends me a txt tonight asking me to reconsider, he knows he's neglected me, didnt put me first, doesn't want marriage to be over, still loves me.

I have asked him to still stay away, I told him I'm not sure I can ever feel the same about him, that I need time and space

So so HmmHmm tonight

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 14/03/2013 22:57

How many empty promises has he made before ?

cjel · 14/03/2013 23:11

Wouldnt advise breaking up family so if you feel that there is any chance of reconciliation then I would suggest going for weekly counselling together while he still lives away.That is all no letting him 'promise' and move back in while he 'trys' again. Don't be confused he was satisfied remember - now he isn't so will do what he thinks he needs to to get it back to how it suited him. You have done the hardest part, the ball is in your court, take it slowly and don't make hasty decisions

Mosschops30 · 14/03/2013 23:18

Yes plenty of these in the past, that's why I told him he still had to leave

OP posts:
Flisspaps · 18/03/2013 09:58

How are you Moss?

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