Dating thread 44

[lubeybooby]

Here we go - all dating chat here!

OWW that is such good news , well done you, no judgements here either, hope you have a smiley happy day!

Lubey good for you!

WFF it is hugely disappointing when you find out someone you thought of as a friend isn't. But as you say better to know.

I had a bit of what goes around comes around type karma yesterday at work...someone who backstabbed me and told others I was shit at my job - I wasn't if course - has now been found to be shit at theirs. I shouldn't revel in others misfortune but it made me :) a little.

And still having heard nothing from C, I text him again last night. No reply yet of course. Hoping I will get to see him next week so we can have some sort of discussion about what's going on, seeing each other more often etc which is impossible by text!

Morning all.

Lubey, Lulu and Nora et al, thanks. Funny but of all the things that have happened recently, this is the thing that has stung.

Lubey I may venture in IE, as I am needing a fwb to tide me over really. I was/am toying with the idea of approaching my last man, but not sure if it is worth tangling up with him and perhaps a fresh situation with someone might be a more emotionally healthy way to proceed.

On the POF forums I put my profile forward for review and was told that it is good but I should remove my filter blocking men who have contacted others for IE. Well today I am going to 'release the hounds'. So far I've had no cockshots and extremely nice men get in touch.

WFF waves to everyone, especially you lurkers, come out of the shadows and post!

Morning Velvet

Morning all!

Well god don't I feel like shit after that late night. Urgh. [coffee] [coffee] [coffee]

WFF :o @ 'release the hounds' hahaahahaaha! Indeed.

I've never seen anything quite like it, being a city I guess bumped up the numbers, and a good 40% of the messages were from dateable men, polite and nice who read the profile properly. Another 10% or so were top notch, very small percentage were the text speaky lost cause potato type.

Who'd a thunk it eh?

Velvet, really hope C replies soon, you're not asking much of him, barely anything in fact. I think a discussion sounds a good idea too when you can get to see him.

I am also having a little :) at the backstabber getting comeuppance!

Lubey, help a girl out Did/Do you create a separate profile for IE?

Is it possible to have 2 profiles on POF? Or can I somehow link my POF profile to IE arena? Does having an IE profile mean that no one (misogynist) will contact me?

Lubey, I love Glasgow anyway, it's one of my favourite cities.

Velvet, serves them right. Knobber.

WFF nope I haven't done a separate profile, though if at any point in future I'm looking for something serious again, I'll probably do one then so I'm not blocked by anyone who has the anti IE filter on. You can have two profiles yes you just need a spare email addy.

The odd misogynist will probably contact you no matter what you are looking for so wouldn't worry about that

WFF - oddly enough, I have recently been let down hugely by two of my supposedly closest friends. Everyone else has been hugely supportive of the situation and totally understanding and sympathetic but they weren't and really behaved badly. I've also been getting more and more fed up with a friend who keeps cancelling things and not understanding why I find that annoying. As I have never fallen out with friends ever, it's really unsettled me. Fortunately I aslo have lots of other lovely friends, so the not-so-lovely ones can fuck right off!!

Thanks Voice/Lubey.

My expectations are higher for friendships than relationships, and that is why I don't really do close/best friends, but have in the past just had a wide circle of friends that I keep at 'arms length'. Until now.

Have just spent the last 20 minutes setting up another POF profile and it has disappeared! I can only find my original profile.

WFF roars

Urrgghhh. I'm so tired with too much to do and I'm waiting on several deliveries. Fuck offff world. I can't deal with being tired! Grumpy zombie mode is not good.

Glad you had a chat OWW and you are content with the decision...see how it goes...isnt it? Oh I am pretty laid back with mates and then for some reason someone will do something and I will have to have a word...and maybe even cut the relationship dead. I have done that twice in the last 2 years....one with a friendship of 18 years standing ...it caused me great pain I might add.

Yeah Lubes ...being tired sucks of eggs....

WFF sorry to hear about your judgy friend. I've been very selective in who I've told and in fact I've only been really open about my dating with my cousin who's also dating and one close friend who doesn't live locally. I've told some friends how I met LM but not all of them and I've not told my mum either how we met. I think she thinks I met him through his work. Too many people are quick to judge from the safety of their cosy marriages and LTRs. There is nothing wrong with dating as many people as you want and for whatever type of relationship you want. You go for it. I think you can probably set up a different profile with a different e-mail address.

Lubey have you chosen one yet? Must be wonderful to be so spoilt for choice!

Very pleased with myself for doing the talk last night. I find that kind of thing excrutiatingly difficult, but I was very calm, very clear, laid all my cards on the table in terms of what I expect and want. I asked him straight out if he wanted to be with me and if he loved me. I think there will be some changes coming. I am much clearer about what he feels about me (which is really good) and what's going on in his head (mixed bag). The profile on Match has now disappeared . . . He said it was an old profile and he just went on sometimes when he got notifications. He has assured me he's not looking for or seeing anyone else and actually I can't see how he would have the time or energy to be carrying on with someone else. I really hope I am not being gullible and being taken for a fool but we will see.

I think this has done me a load of good in making me communicate properlly and I've promised myself that I'll do so in future if I'm not happy, rather than stew and whittle about stuff.

Thank you everyone for putting up with all this nonsense.

I have told the whole pub about my dating....I suppose I think if people keep OD covert it will always be seen as something 'not right'.....but they expect me to be a bit 'out there' so ...no loss of face as such...

OWW yeah I think so. He's got my number anyway... we'll see. I'm still checking out the others though too or rather will later on anyway cba at the moment.

It's good to hear you are happy. That's all anyone wants for you, and it's not nonsense at all! It's what we are here for. [hug]

Do you think he's now going to be able to give you something that resembles the relationship you want/need?

Most people know I am OD. It stops them all asking WHY I am still single (which after 4 years is a mystery to everyone...). Only a few know about C though.

He called this morning, by mistake of course, phone was in his pocket or whatever. And then text to say sorry, had he called me? Nothing in reply to my text sent last night of course. Bloody useless!!

OWW not nonsense at all, that is what everyone is here, to support each other and try and make sense of what life throws at us all. I think you have done FAB, new chapter eh? good luck!

WFF release the hounds?? love it!

I was quite shy about telling people I was OD at first, but was actually surprised at the warm response I got, I can't think of anyone who thought it was dodgy (maybe my mum, a bit) and I actually discovered by telling people, how many people I know had met their OH online. When people have asked how Mr EA and I have met, I was a bit embarrassed to say when we were first together, but he is really open about it and that has helped me just be upfront. At the end of the day, what is there for people to judge? wanting to find someone to love and be with? how terrible

oh btw Lubey suggest you catch up on your ZZZZ's sounds like you are going to need your energy in the next few weeks

Velvet could you not text back a slightly tongue in cheek reply, along the lines of ... well at least it confirms that your phone is still working! looking forward to you replying to my text in the near future, if you haven't worn your battery out ........ or is that just me??

My first POF cockshot and message with the words 'hun' and 'babe' despite saying 'do not use the words 'hun' or 'babe'

WFF bet you are falling over yourself to get back to that charmer? you have to reply ..... I love the "sorry can't make out what you have sent me a picture of , it looks like a willy only smaller?" who came up with that one originally? it makes me laugh every time

Lubey, yes, it was almost there before, and I'm hoping that with a few things changing it will be a lot better. We'll see. I am cautiously optimistic . . . I know he is never going to be the easiest person in the world to be in a relationship with, but then again I don't think I am either. If we can find something that suits the two of us, that will do for me.

Sounds like a lot of fun with the Glasgow men!

That's a great response Lulu....