Crotch grabbing, jelly nailing, double-quick portions and man parts floating in a pear tree...dating thread 33 survived Christmas so bring on NYE!

[OhLittleTownofWesternWind]

Here we are!

Good luck Bant - keep those beer goggles firmly in their case.

Hello Bunny - good to have you here. Have you been on any dates yet?

Sponge you are incredibly glamorous and more than a match for any half-assed Spaceman. Take no notice of your "friend".

And everyone stop talking about food! Need to get rid of Christmas belly pronto.

Cheers western - not even put a photo up or sent an email yet. Still a bit spooked by the whole thing tbh, but taking strength (and useful female perspectives) from this thread so will make the plunge shortly.

bumhead problem is in my case my friend has (sort of) got a point. 4 years of trying and no-one does want me. It's not like I'm turning men down, it's almost always the reverse.

Treat it all as a bit of fun Bunny and tune your ... well, for the laydeez it's a twat radar, so whatever the male equivalent is, and you'll be fine. The first date's the most nerve-racking then it just gets easier.

If you want anyone to look over your profile etc there will be volunteers on here. And advice/feedback any time you want. Best of luck.

Flo, I don't know really ( possibly about to out myself to anyone who knows me in RL ) I met Maris when I was 18 and since then have had a bit of a 'thing' for a Northern Irish accent. You know how there were so many terrible things going on over there in the 80s and they'd always have spokesmen on the News ? Well, I was sat there perving - shameful, isn't it ?

I've been out with Scots too, really I need a Welshman to complete my 'Home Nations ' set.

She does not have a point, Velvet, friends give you support, they don't make you feel bad about yourself. Gavel.

I second MsArsebiscuit on this one Velvet.

You will meet someone fabulous. Promise. The right man will come along they always do.

You see, Velvet, myself and Bumhead have formed a bottom coalition, we must be right

Its arse Velvet and you know that really....(not referring to our own delightful Ms Arse of course!)

No ...you dont need a Welshman Arse...really you dont!

I say that cos I am surrounded by the bleeders.....

ike, what's wrong with Taffs, then ? You can't decry a whole nation just because a couple of them were crap shags, shoorely ?

That's ok, Ike, I don't think I actually want a Welshman as such, I just feel like I should have one to complete the set ... Actually Mr Talent Show ( he of the floating gonad ) claimed to be Welsh, part of the reason I tolerated the daft sod for more than five minutes.

If short n swarthy with curly hair and smelling of leeks is your thing...be my guest.......

Hi all

Blokey has confirmed date tomorrow... eeek!

I'm still wailing about having nothing to wear. I've lost my fave lovely and kind of sexy but also warm knitted dress. I don't know how that is even possible, but it's typical! argh

Oh yeah they think they have big balls alrite!!!

Lubey check right at the bottom of the washing basket...

She has got a point in that I must be doing something wrong. I don't think I'm setting my sights too high though, cos I'm not turning men down, I never do, never get the chance.

The joke of it is I'm contacted by all these men, and they all say 'Velvet, you're gorgeous, can't believe you're single'. Then I meet them, and they completely lose interest and I never hear from them again.

I'd like to think that might change but after 4 years I think it's pretty fucking unlikely.

Also look in DD's wardrobe/drawers..

Yes i will have a hunt around... hmmm. MUST be somewhere ffs

Thanks western I enjoy dating so looking forward to that bit. Its the weirdness of doing it online that I need to get over.

Twat radar sounds like a useful means of finding women on a night out, so I'll go with boiler avoider for my shorthand instead!

lubey check washing basket, behind washing basket, ironing pile, wardrobe (I have an annoying habit of putting shirts/cardigans over things on hangers), floor of wardrobe, in drawers (I sometimes fold things I'd normally hung up depending on how tired I was when putting away the washing), under bed, and anywhere else. Hope it turns up, and that tomorrow goes well :)

velvet if it's any consolation, having briefly met you, I don't understand why you're single either... But then I like smart, strong, intellectually superior people in general. If anything, you make these 'men' feel inadequate. That is very firmly their problem, not yours.

When you do meet him,he will be awesome and I will be a smidge jealous, but that will be pushed to the back of my mind because I will be happy that one of us got a good one.