Men who don't watch porn

[FBworry]

I do not believe all men watch porn.

However I wonder why they dont with it now being the "norm"?

Was there never any interest in the first place? Has it lost its shine? Is it a for feminist reasons?

Or is it more of a case of resisting temptation? As in they do want to watch but guilt and/or morals stop them? Fear of being caught?

We live in a time when we are constantly fed the message all men watch porn so nobody ever discusses those that don't watch it.

that's nothing compared to the names i mentioned before. you ARE being patronising etc etc, but that's so not the same as sad bastards and porn losers etc! offred such as? if you mean me saying blame was being patronising i stand by that.

SolidGoldBrass, that was an incredibly patronising post to KnowNoLies.

At no point did she say that feeling judged by others was her main problem with porn, yet you are superimposing this on her to be the major issue. Bizarre. Will you simply choose to disbelieve the experience of women in this industry, even first-hand evidence from those who have chosen it?

I really am stunned at your position on porn. You seem so wilfully blind and so entrenched in your views which, as has been pointed out upthread, make no sense.

Read the thread cheese.

Don't come on assuming the mantle of arbiter if what you are actually doing is weighing in on one side.

Oh, I was being patronising, because several times andula has insinuated that I'm a bit dim and/or a hypocrite. Unfortunately she has always overlooked something during her attack. So, no, she's not very good at it.

I'm not surprised you don't see any insults tbh, it doesn't fit in with your argument. Hey ho.

Off to ds's xmas concert now, toodle pip.

i have read the entire thread. and what i said originally was how judgemental some of you are being. i'm not purposely taking a 'side' but it was getting a bit heavy from the anti-porn posters

So if you have read the thread, for balance can you collect up all the pro-porn side's insults?

bela Why so rude to me? Thats my opinion. Why is it that people can't have a debate and must resort to just being rude.

Because otherwise it looks suspiciously like you are purposefully taking a side...

ok well i got that husbands are lying, sex lives have dried up, prudes - im not sure if this is what you mean though?

You were pretty offensive Claire with your "just like men who say they aren't bothered about sex more than once a week... Lol" how utterly horrible that comment was....

I think it is pretty clear you are not that impartial then. "Oh ha ha! You're all sexually frustrated, JUST KIDDING!" Has been said more than once. But then I suppose there is a problem in that a lot of the worst has been deleted because it was so bad.

no i'm not saying i don't see posts like that as insulting i meant i didn't know if those were the sort of things you were referring to

I also thought know was talking about how she felt about her experiences, not others. Sgb, you often accuse others of projecting their own opinions on others, and there you just made a typical example of it

Ah, andula. You keep forgetting to let me know how you can tell that the women in the porn you watch aren't vulnerable, exploited or trafficked! I realise it must just be an oversight, because you said earlier that you were confident that you could ttell. It would be really good if you shared, then everyone could do the same.

offred Are you serious?! How old are you? How is that a horrible comment. I'm hardly being controversial by suggesting that men like to have sex. Alot.

Not controversial, offensive. How rude you are...

It is a horrible sexist comment.

It is ignorant, not to mention lazy and stereotypically sexist, to suggest that men want lots of sex and women don't and should either "put out" more or accept that men will turn to porn, because well , "they're men, they have needs what do you expect".

"Men like to have sex a lot" has been used to sexually abuse both men and women I know and it implies the other assumed "universal truth" that "women don't like sex". I do think porn affects this (and I include pornographic images/writing in non-porn mainstream media) because it is one of the messages it gives and also one of the situations it creates because of this "porn can help your relationship by showing you new positions/moves" and because the sex in porn is not concerned with female pleasure (I am aware this is not universal I am talking generally), the women in porn are required to act and to fake and so it sets a model of desirable sex being about "moves" and "positions" and getting women who "don't like sex" to do things irrespective of their enjoyment and women to think faking is required. A lot of men practise porn sex and a lot of women think they have to pretend to enjoy it. When important things happen in their lives like babies they lose the motivation for faking. If women were really being satisfied by the sex that was generally on offer or even if they generally felt that sex should consider women's pleasure things might not become a self-fulfilling prophecy and if you seriously think that the porn industry hasn't got vested interests in setting expectations so that real life sex fails and porn sex seems appealing I think you must be deliberately trying to ignore it.

Sigh... I am sure there are men who are exceptions, just as some women enjoy porn. That's why I used the word most. In my circles, what I say is true. In yours its obviously not, fair enough.

I am not going to get drawn into defending myself, but I would like to point out that at no point did I say women should put out or accept that men will turn to porn. That seems to be your opinion.

Enjoy your bitching ladies - I am too old for this!

Bela, not as lazy as telling a stranger to f* off because you don't agree with their opinion, as you did yesterday to Claire

I find this "I'm too old for this" "how old are you?" Incredibly rude and totally irrelevant... What about finding sexism offensive is immature? Perhaps you didn't realise you were perpetuating sexist stereotypes?

really? asterixing out fuck but you can make jokes about women fingering themselves in the bath?

honestly, when Claire joined the thread yesterday the same topics had been covered over and over, and along comes someone with a fabulous insight... that had already been discussed. while telling someone to fuck off may be lazy, pro-porners have been pretty abusive themselves, remember yorkshire's charming posts?

but, as I said, that doesnt fit in with your argument, does it?

"Add message | Report | Message poster Andula Thu 13-Dec-12 15:50:59
morecheese, I know, it's like they're too frustrated to have a normal conversation (joke) "

Funny, because I was wondering why if your own sex life is so fabulous and fulfilling with your dp, why would you possibly need to turn to strangers on the internet for sexual kicks?That to me smacks of frustration with your own sex life.

Blame - that wasn't a joke, and I asterixed to protect some of the gentle flowers on here.

FB - that was a joke (notice the word JOKE, which I added to help you). and your last comment shows how you don't understand how/why people (particularly couples) watch porn.