Don't know what to think.

[CherryPie3]

Last night my husband sat me down as he had something to tell me.

On Friday he went to his friends evening wedding reception. I was working at his mum's shop.
As he was leaving at 11:45pm a young girl that was attending someone else's wedding reception walked across the carpark explaining that she had no money and could he please take her into town to meet her friends. She was also on the phone to her friends explaining that she had no money.

Despite town being out of his way he took her as he didn't want to leave her stranded.

As he was driving she declared that he was gorgeous and placed her feet up on his dashboard. She then started using her fingers to pleasure herself and asked my dh to take her somewhere dark and private. Which he didn't, he explained he had to get back to the reception as he had left his friends there.

Upon arriving at town she asked him repeatedly to have sex with her, and was getting quite angry that he was refusing to. When she finally got out she punched my dh on the cheek and slammed the door.

My dh then went back to the wedding reception and didn't get home until 3am. He explained he was so late because his friends wanted taking home.

I was very calm while he was telling me as something similar happened to me twice before - not as disgusting but a 'friend' tried kissing me whilst I was dropping him off at home, he then sent me disgusting texts despite me telling him to take a run and jump! Another 'friend' tried to kiss me after a group night out.

I'm absolutely sickened by the whole thing and have been physically sick this morning because I had to drive his car on Saturday, completely oblivious that this woman had been sat in it pleasuring herself. I never ever want to set foot in that car again! She was sat where I normally would if dh was driving.

Now I'm thinking about it I have so many questions that don't make sense.

1. Why would she ask a stranger for help when she must have friends/family at the reception that could have helped her out?

2. Why did my husband go out of his way to help a stranger, knowing there must be other people she knows that would help her.

3. Why did he return to his friends afterwards instead of coming straight home.

4. Why didn't he explain he had a wife and 3 kids waiting for him at home instead of having to go back to his friends.

5. Why did he leave it until last night to tell me?

I am so confused and hurt and upset and angry and devastated.... I love my husband so much and I don't think he would ever, ever cheat on me but those questions are getting to me. I wish I could switch my brain off.
I'm very insecure at the best of times without this. I am a very wobbly size 24 lady and he says this girl was a slim girl with short blonde hair.

We have just recently celebrated our 7th wedding anniversary, he is 25, I am 27. Our children are 7, 6, 2yrs.

What should I be thinking? I'm sorry it's long.

Sorry op but it really does sound like one of those fantasy letters to Playboy.
Apart from the punch in the head thing.

Why would he tell you unless he was trying to 'get in first' before she or a friend told you he was seen leaving with a strange woman?

It all sounds really off and not at all truthful.

I agree with the poster who said that the story seems too far fetched to be made up. Reality is sometimes stranger than fiction. He also wasn't sure if he should tell you or not, perhaps he genuinely didn't want to hurt you?
There are some crazy people out there, perhaps the girl had a fantasy about getting in strangers car and getting laid.
After something like this happens one would be disoriented and perhaps he drove back to the reception without thinking.

edam - me too!

handbag - I'm used to him ferrying his friends around, if on the rare occasion I go out, I do the same as I don't drink either when I'm out. Only in the house now and then.

Jolly jumper, I am with you.

OP please don't disbelieve your DH because a load of people on MN don't believe him. We don't know him. YOU do.

Cherry what i'm reading about contacting the police is very sounding very sensible.

Irrespective of the issues you have with the story.

I think after you've gone through it with him later (and of course if you come to the conclusion that all is as he says - which i think you will) you just say 'right, i believe you. We must now contact the police!' List the reasons you've seen here.

It's the sensible thing to do - and will be the very best way to end any suspicions you have too as his reaction will be make things clear as day.

UC your last comment is absolutely key. MN people can offer up suggestions, alternatives, questions you can ask etc - but really it's just what you think that matters, you do know him best

It is an unbelievable story, granted.

But...

It's amazing how the truth very often is unbelievable.

I would hesitate to say that he's completely innocent, but somehow it has the ring of truth to me.

JollyJumper - the way you put sounds just like something my dh would do. Go into some sort of shock/autopilot.

I hope you're right and he's telling me the truth. I feel quite sorry for him actually, he's got me that's upset with the uncertainty of all of it. If he really is telling the truth then it must be awful for him thinking I don't believe him. :(

The thing is too, he very rarely goes out. He usually opts to stay in with me [because I'm a sad act and have no friends].
He sometimes rings his friend on a night as they're both managers and like to compare how their day went etc.
He only goes out if it's a special occasion - close friends birthday, wedding, engagement.

Fluffy - it absolutely makes too much sense not to call the police. This could all too easily be turned on him and could escalate from there.

I think that it all sounds a bit sorry Cherry.

If it was me I'd be telling him that I'd already asked the venue to watch the car park footage and that they've agreed to let me go up and watch it tomorrow (I'd tell him that they had agreed to it as I'd told the hotel that the car was damaged)

If he was OK with me watching the cctv footage I'd go one step further and insist that he absolutely must report it to the police as it was an assault.

Then I'd gauge his reaction...

Can I just say thank you to absolutely everybody that has commented on this thread - I'm so grateful!!

I am inclined to believe him. I need to hear him tell me the story again though later, where I will question it and question it until I'm satisfied.

Would I just ring the local police station to report it? Obv not 999

How could it be turned on him Cherry? By the police you mean?

I'm also wondering that inviting him to have sex would then leave her feeling able to
A) ask for money
B) steal money
C)go to police crying rape

Just a thought.

It's ok, i've got you now i thought you were saying you wouldnt call the police as it they'd turn it on him.

The non emergency police line would be the way to go.

You could ring the non emergency number 101. But obvs discuss it with him first.

Reporting it to the police will rattle his cage lol.

MAYBE then you will get the truth.

He's probably done something he shouldn't have and is worried he was spotted, and that it will get back to you. Or maybe the police tapped on the window.

Either way whatever happens remember you have support on here.

I'm starting to think he's telling the truth now. No idea why. Just sharing that with you OP.

Please let us know how it goes later? I wish i could make you a cupper in RL

I'm just trying to imagine the police's reaction to someone reporting this story.

UC - for some reason I missed your post at the top of this page. I think that's a very good point to make. I would have been very upset at being woken up by a shaken up dh. It takes quite a lot to shake him.
On the picture I think he was about 23, he does look a but older than that now (partly because he hates shaving and so constantly has his stubble, [I secretly love this ] ) but he's still only 25.

Do you know what, I think the story is so far fetched, it has to be true

I don't think it's odd that he would tell her...my DH would tell me if some girl came on to him.

It is UNUSUAL....but not impossible that a girl might do soemthing like this...maybe she was ery drunk? Or has problems....but I do find it concerning. If anything, if it IS true...then it underlines how vulnerable men can be.

She could have accused him of anything. He should have called her a cab. If she had no cash, then he should have taken her back to the reception or advised her to do so.

I still think he sounds honest and i am always ver suspicious. I would still be upset that my husband was silly enough to take a young woman out in his car and be having words.

If any part of you feels he is lying then use the cctv footgae thing to guage his reaction! he might be pleased that they have it so he can prove to you his story...

None of this is beyond the realms of what can happen. He sounds like a nice man.

Some girls DO propostion men...out of the blue. When I was 15, I had a friend who did similar to a taxi driver to get out of a cab fare.... She told me later...very proud of herself.

Clam - yep, you're not the only one!!

Thingsthatmakeyougmhmm - thanks, I'm glad there are people on MN who will offer up sound advice and support. :)

Fluffy - re-reading my post, I worded it rather badly didn't I? Sorry
Cuppa sounds nice!! Have now made a coffee. Lush :)

Hi. I'd also be inclined to believe him, and I am someone who struggles with trust. They said fact is stranger than fiction!
If he's as lovely and helpful as you say, then he's probably innocent. I was recently attacked and a 'good' friend of mine said it was my fault as i am a 'bit flirty' anyway. She would not beleive i had not led this person on. Its very annoying being innocent when no-one believes you.
So. Ask him again later but do not distrust him jsut yet :)