Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

What to do

86 replies

Wat2do · 19/09/2012 22:20

This is dp question, left my wife for ow, stbx ex w hates me and new girlfriend, been together 12 months, how long does it take?

OP posts:
Aspiemum2 · 19/09/2012 22:56

I love poached eggs Grin

KeemaNaanAndCurryOn · 19/09/2012 22:58

On toast?

Original poster
Wat2do · 19/09/2012 22:58

I ended it with Ex to be with DP didnt shag around behind her back. dont expect her to be happy but its been 12 months and shes still using the kids against me, drinking heavily and causing as much trouble as possible. Caffcass meeting next month :(

OP posts:
Aspiemum2 · 19/09/2012 23:01

No with bacon and beans. That's my version off the full English!

AnyFucker · 19/09/2012 23:02

but what about the motorbike ?

Shakey1500 · 19/09/2012 23:03

Op- it will takes as long as it takes, and that may be never. As long as you are supporting the kids and having regular access/are a positive influence on their lives, then that's all you can do.

(yes, on hot buttered toast :) )

BoysBoysBoysAndMe · 19/09/2012 23:03

You've obviously hurt her very much.

12 months ago I bet she didn't think she was going to be a single parent.

Be a dad and give her time and support.

Aspiemum2 · 19/09/2012 23:05

What colour motorbike? I like green ones Grin

KeemaNaanAndCurryOn · 19/09/2012 23:08

Did you leave her, then meet and get together with your current P.

Or did you leave her FOR your current P.

There's a big difference isn't there.

Original poster
Wat2do · 19/09/2012 23:08

I try to be a good dad, see them as often as she lets me and pay 4x what i would have to pay via the csa, it's just the way she speaks to the children about me and chopping and changing access, not allowing them to come to my house, stay over night etc. just want the children to have stability and i know this can happen even when parents split but she is making it so difficult.

OP posts:
CremeEggThief · 19/09/2012 23:08

Aw! Poor you...

I hope you feel the pain you've put her through one day.

Original poster
Wat2do · 19/09/2012 23:10

I left her when i realised i was developing feelings for current DP - not right i know.

OP posts:
UnlikelyAmazonian · 19/09/2012 23:12

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

KeemaNaanAndCurryOn · 19/09/2012 23:13

No, its not right.

You left your wife for another woman and you want to know when she'll get over it. Its a "How long is a piece of string" question isn't it. I'm guessing her upset is really taking the gloss off your new life and new relationship.

Deal with it.

NewStartSameStory · 19/09/2012 23:18

Possibly never OP.

I am just amazed people use pans of water to poach eggs and not a poaching pan. so much easier

Dryjuice25 · 19/09/2012 23:22

Didn't think of the kids beforehand then??? Bet she would tell a different story. You can't buy the kids off but good luck.....and I hope she will meet someone nice to be step dad to your kids one day......and then she might forgive you.

caramelwaffle · 19/09/2012 23:25

Perhaps when she meets a fabulous new man? Who knows?

(Poached eggs on brown bread toast with butter - delicious.)

paranoidandroidwreckmyownlife · 19/09/2012 23:28

And are you wanting your access time to be with OW as well? If so that's just rubbing salt in sore wounds.
But coming from a DW who's husband did the same thing, or rather was a complete coward and was so awful to me he forced me into leaving rather than have OW shoved in my face on a daily basis, and that wasn't physical but an emotional affair too. It hurts like hell, I feel like he's ripped out my heart and torn in apart with his bare hands. I will never forgive him for the lies, the secrecy, the all night texting, the making me feel like I was paranoid, the fear and the panic, and finally the betrayal. You might want to try some empathy OP. you've destroyed her life, and you want to know when she'll get over it...Jeez!

Dryjuice25 · 19/09/2012 23:31

Poached eggs with toast and manuka honey......yum yum. Has anyone tried this with chutney? And where is Lou? Hope she is ok

FaffTastic · 19/09/2012 23:31

OP - you are a man who left his dw for an OW - you are never going to get reasonable, objective or helpful advice in relation to your issue on MN

If you were a woman however, you must have had justifiable reasons for falling for another man and your exh would be an absolute bastard for begrudging you and using your children as pawns in your divorce

Hey ho

Doha · 19/09/2012 23:40

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

Daisym0use · 19/09/2012 23:42

Could drinking be her way of coping when her husband dumped her for OW. Have some compassion OP, you've just ruined her life. Well she might think like that now but I'm sure she'll realise she's well shot of you soon. You poor man, must be so hard for you. sure her hatred will turn to pity soon and pity is much worse!

Prefer them made in pan of water with a splash of vinegar myself, hmm that's tomorrow's breakfast decision made

akaemmafrost · 19/09/2012 23:48

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

akaemmafrost · 19/09/2012 23:50

"this is dp question". Am I right in thinking its your new dp asking?

Ask her how long she thinks it will take her to get over it when you do the same thing to her, leopards and all that.

ThingsThatMakeYouGoHmmm · 19/09/2012 23:51

This thread has proper made me laugh Grin