Firstly we have been married 13 years last Tuesday and in 2004 after my mother died and our marriage was at rock bottom, I found out he had kissed a girl that he works with. He was lonely and I was being a nightmare, divorce was on the cards! He admitted this to me a few days after it happened, she left the company and nothing else happened.
We have had 2 children since then and recently my FIL went into hospital, on his last legs, who has subsequently died.
My DH has admitted to me that 4 wks ago, he left the pub leaving his mates to come home as he was too drunk. (I can at least vouch for that as I spoke to him before going to bed and the conversation contained a lot of slurring) Anyway he met her outside a pub with her friend and walked back home, he ended up at her friends house, a few more drinks, her friend went to bed and he thinks, he thinks!! he may have slept with her. He doesn't recall kissing or touching but he knows his trousers were un-done, (but when he is drunk he goes to the toilet, Undoes his trousers and tends to not do them back up again!!) She straddled him in a chair and when she him to move from the chair and thats when he realised what he was doing and ran home. He has very vague memories of that night and doesn't really know what happened. I have made him think hard as I wanted to know exactly what happened.
Now bearing in mind his dad died two days later. I'm not surprised, he didn't tell me sooner, but for the last 3 weeks, I knew that there was something wrong and not just grief.
We have always been open with each other and maintained an honest relationship, so I trust that is why he told me. He also looked shit scared when he told me as he thought I would throw him out and take the kids with me.
He has been sensible and been to the hospital and is awaiting test results etc etc, so I'm pleased about that.
I love him very much and have told him that we will get through it. I'm not wasting the last 20 yrs of my life for one stupid night and a trollop and have never actually seen him look so sorry.
I'm not sure whether its advice I'm looking for on here or if anything at all as I know I want to stay with him and make it work. My issue is that I dont really fancy discussing with it my mates and just need to get it out.
I dont think I am a fool, maybe I am. Sometimes its easy to forget and then I picture them together and I feel sick. I'm hoping that will pass.
Also the thing is, is that I'm not overally sexual and never have been, but now we have to wait for these tests to come back. Thats all I can think about.