I can't be bothered to entertain the inlaws when they do f*** all to help us

[mogwai]

Seriously.

Husband wants nice big happy family where we have his folks round for sunday lunch.

On the other hand, we have a young child, we both work and he works shifts as well as studying for exams. We are both totally stressed out and knackered.

Buggered if I'm cooking and cleaning up after his parents. They do f* all to help us out and see the baby about once every six weeks on average (live four miles away).

Sod 'em. Cooking for us and nobody else right now

What do ya reckon?

hmmm well.. if i wanted my parents over for lunch then i'd expect dp to be happy with that, even if that did mean i cooked and cleared away.

is your dh happy to jhelp you prepare a meal and clear up afterwards? If so then I have to say I would do it... it's his parents after all

Good for you!

I took that stance recently. (I was always doing the travelling to visit people - they would never make the effort to come here - and im the only one with 2 small children under 3 to drag around with me).

I didnt see my family for 3 weeks. They then came round this weekend bearing gifts and all sorts.

Does DH Know how you feel about them?

we're both fed up with them. They were really full on and excited when I was pregnant and when the baby was born.

Novelty wore off. We're under a lot of strain right now and they know it but they still offer no help and don't respond to heavy hints. Took baby for a wlak four weeks ago (after husband rang to ask them) but made quick get away afterwards and no mention of ever doing it again.

I'm sure they would respond to an invitation for a lamb dinner but I think I'll have those roast spuds myself. Grrrrrr.

(yeah, he would help clear up afterwards, but it's the principle of entertaining them that pisses me off)

maybe hints aren't enough? if you want them to help out ask them!
my mum ignores me if i hint that i need someone to have Linus... but she's more than happy to do it if I come out and ask her.

(aside - god that's a lovely name, Linus)

(but then I'd have to share the roast potatoes)

(thanks )

(that IS a problem)

(no, you're not having any)

(damn)

you need a solution like mine... we go to my parents every sunday for our roast! no cooking, no clearing up, baby gets entertained and my dad makes fab roast spuds!

I need PARENTS like yours.

I was in a playbarn place today and there was a granny with her two year old grandson, both of them climbing up the play equipment. she must have been 70 at least, and she was wearing a tweed skirt. I was admiring her grandson and she said "well, I come here because it gives his mum and dad a break".

(The tweed skirt is irrelevant, I just added it for emphasis and to give me something else to put in brackets).

actually i liked the tweed skirt bit.
yes, i admit i do have fab parents. and luckily dp's parents live 6 hours away.

is there anything more I can say to rub it in?

oh yeah, my baby sleeps really well! lol

i think you either need to forget about them or FORCE them to be involved... just invite them over and then say "watch mogwaijnr while i do dinner"

then go and have a nice cuppa