I need a stern talking to....

[MsFish]

I am a complete numpty and need you strong mumsnetters to help me grow a backbone! I met a man off the internet, as you do, and after a few dates he has now started ignoring me. I thought I could separate the emotion from the sex after a long time single and feeling strong. Turns out I can't. I am old enough to know better.

Tell me that I need to step away from the email where I want to spill my guts, as this is pathetic and needy and I don't want to be that person!

Do not, under any circumstances (pissed or otherwise) call him
If he is interested he will call
If he isn't, a rambling email from you will not endear him to you.
It will just give your pride a big pasting when he doesn't respond, or worse, responds kindly giving you the brush off (oh the horror)

So, did you fuck him? Because it seems like he has got what he wants and has moved on - so, lucky escape and be more choosy next time? HTH

I wanted to fuck him, and I know i should have been a bit more cautious,,, I blame the hormones! I will step away from the email. I feel a bit dejected and rejected (understatement)!

Ceremonially burn a print out of one of his e-mails, throw darts at a picture of him, write him a childish letter full of insults then burn it, sing a few choruses of 'I Will Survive' or some equally cheesey song. And then don't ever contact him again.

You say 'I am old enough to know better'. Do you know what, I think as we get older we forget how much a bruised heart hurts until it happens to us again. It bloody kills. But better an empty house than a bad tenant, love. (Well known saying where I come from!)

Look, don't be too hard on yourself, if he was the right man you could have thrown caution to the wind and he would still have been the right man. Bedded or unbedded.
Think of it as a thrilling sexual encounter an no more
Cougar!

Do not contact him. You'll just hate yourself when he doesn't respond and get even more upset.
You said he's 'started ignoring' you. Who contacted who last? And when?

Thanks,,, I may do that, all the sweet stuff he said, all the plans he made and now I am left with a blank. Why? Why not just say that they don't want to meet again instead of this terrible limbo????

...and I was so hoping I had grown up and gotten a thicker skin!

I have done the pathetic emails ....hello,,,how are you? even a text message asking the same and no response, nothing since Saturday, and he was contacting me daily before that and we last met on Thursday.

I am not going to email or text again,,,but I need you to help me keep that resolve...

We see what we want to see when its an online friendship, but i bet the guy was a total knobjockey, you have had a lucky escape. Brush yourself off...........

Don't feel embarrassed that you emailed and text him. He wasn't embarrassed when he was contacting you iyswim.

Desist from now on though. It is very rude of him not to reply. You do not want to go out with a rude man.

Oh, and don't regret the sex if you enjoyed it.

yes,, he was obviously a knobjockey, or else why not be man enough to end it in a civilised manner,, even a piss off by text is better than a blank (especially when you know they are still alive as logging into dating site)!

Oh, and thanks,,,keep it coming, be harsh, I am feeling a bit more resolved already...

I have been dumped twice via text (and I only got a mobile when I was 25). It is not better.

Yes, the sex was good,,,after a dry spell, any sex is likely to be good though!

Out of interest, what does this guy do for a living?

Alright nothing since Saturday. He's gone, unless he's trapped under something heavy which is highly unlikely.
If he contacts you again without a very good explanation, assume it's a booty call and tell him to bog off. No problem with booty calls when that's what you both want, but it sounds like you're a bit too emotionally involved to keep it at that.

At least with a text you know you are dumped,,,,it's the not knowing,,have i been dumped or not???? blooming hurts though, text or no text...sympathies to you all who have given over a bit of love ....

I want to not be emotionally involved,,,thought I could be, but noooooo.....

MsFish - you are dumped!

Thanks,,,I have now been told,,,now, how do I move on?

For a living he has his own company....but looking to get a job in NHS...why?

Oh, that's the hard part isn't it? When it was me I would get drunk.

You're dumped. But even if you weren't and he bloody turns up out of the blue, do you think it's ok for him to behave like this? Ignoring you isn't ok.

Getting drunk is ok as long as it doesn't lead to drunk dialling/emailing/carrier pigeons....

Don't know why I asked. Nosiness I guess.