Don't shout

[atosilis]

every now and then I come on here and complain. Today we had an anniversary and he went mental because I wouldn't have sex. We had a friend staying - won't even go down that path - but I am so sad, I have lost the friend and went to the funeral of my best friend who killed herself. I have cut my leg and it won't stop bleeding and I just wa ted a nice weekend

You want someone with you to say goodbye to him? To leave?

Before we get to see what he's said, I feel obliged to point out that your h has no vested interest whatsoever in telling you the truth, and that whatever he claims your friend may have said or told him is unlikely to be an honest or accurate account of any conversation they may have had about you.

That said, I'm agog to read your transcript...

The whole day you have been standing in the kitchen talking to people'

• They?re not people, they?re my friends. How are we celebrating today? Please can we go to the Aviator?

You have done it by arranging to go out with random people on every other day that you?re on holiday

• I?m here

You have arranged to go away with people

#I?m standing in front of you on our anniversary

You don?t spend any time with me, you won?t have sex with me, I don?t know why you?re here. If you don?t cook, clean or have sex, what?s the point?

I am here

Yes, me too Izzy...

He isn't listening to you, just talking at you.

He doesn't want to acknowledge your relationship is non existent and nor do you.

If you could have one wish what would it be?

I don't want to cause pain to him or my babies.

Shhhhh Can you hear that?

That sound is him storing and me cringing.
One day I will worry about my mental health above his pack of lard.

Only you can make that decision, heart breaking as it is to read and post that you would rather relieve yourself through harming yourself instead of finishing your leaving plan.

We will always be here to listen and support, I just hope you find some inner strength

He isn't listening :(
He doesn't hear you :(

OP the biggest pain you can cause your children and their children is by being a shadow of the woman you should be

Unlike some of the other posters, I don't know your history but you are in too much pain to continue. I think your time to leave him has to come soon.

He might sort himself out if you leave? My ex did.

But you haven't got any babies.

Your dc are fully grown and have long flown the nest and you leaving him is not going to cause them any pain.

As for not causing him any pain; this man doesn't care about you. You're little more than a domestic appliance to him and you serve the additional purpose of him being able to use you to vent his spleen whenever it suits him.

He's not remotely concerned about your mental health. All he's concerned about is getting what he wants when he wants it.

If he's physically impaired and needs help in the house, he can apply to the local authority for a care package.

There is nothing to keep you with him so why haven't you left?

Irony know the ops history, never read a thread by op before but I can hear her screaming through my iPad

I don't know the op - not irony although it isn't to miss placed IMO

Irony is you thinking you are helping by staying.....