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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Can there be any innocent explanation for this?

85 replies

Shh2012 · 12/07/2012 23:15

Went round to see OH this evening. He picked me up so he knew I was going ot his place.His computer was on at his email screen and I noticed a subject line in his Inbox was a confirmation of a hotel . Booked in the name of 'Miss 'Initial Surname'. The booking reference code was also visible. (I didn't open his email. this was all visible right there on the screen). I memorised the booking code then went to the loo with my handbag and wrote it down.

Just got home and went on the hotel site (it's one of the very well known chain hotels) put the booking reference and name in and found the booking. It's booked in the name of Miss Initial Surname, for four days, Monday to Friday, and a family room has been booked. One adult and 2 kids. It's a hotel that's about 10 miles from where OH lives, quite close to his office. The contact phone number on the booking is my OH's mobile number Sad Angry
OH doesn't have kids. As far as I know he doesn't have anyone in his past with the initial of this woman.

Obviously I'm suspecting something really bad. But a few things don't add up. The fact that the booking is 4 days midweek. The fact that she's got two kids with her. Why did he book it in her name and not his?
Any ideas??...can this possibly be something innocent?..
What should I do? Confront him now or observe how he behaves during the days she's booked into this hotel?

OP posts:
Less · 16/07/2012 10:50

No No I wasn't trying to put doubt, as I said I'm glad he's without reproach,as you say no difference between hotel and his own house etc,

But, I don't see how its the better option for the tenant TBH and if he wanted to be a really really good landlord there are better places to out them Wink

Shh2012 · 16/07/2012 11:03

Where would you suggest he put them? If there's somewhere more appropriate he should know about it. All I know is that landlords don't have to make alternative arrangements for tenants so I'm interested to hear (and advise him) of other options.
And as I said, this is what she wanted. She's not been forced into it. We don't know her circumstances. She obviously thinks it's the better option for her.

OP posts:
Shh2012 · 16/07/2012 11:04

Wobbly, thanks.

OP posts:
Less · 16/07/2012 11:20

I'm not sure where the aggression is coming from, I'm not critising your DP at all, I'm just curious as to why the tenant would think this was a better arrangement than being at home. Would you want to be stuck on one room with no facilities, company or outside space, with 2 DC during the school hols?

As you asked, nicer hotel with breakfast and meals or short let with cooking facilities?

Shh2012 · 16/07/2012 12:02

I'm not intentionally being aggressive and I do apologise if that's what's coming over.
Short let with cooking faciilities is a great idea for the properties he has in bigger towns and cities but this particular house is in an area where it's highly unlikely there are any short let aparments close. So, whatever her reasons for this Travelodge suiting her, I don't know, but the main one would seem to be that it's about a mile from where her house is. I don't know the exact reason why she wanted to stay there, so without me asking her I guess we'll never know. But there is a place to eat onsite at this hotel.

He's under no obligation as a landlord to provide alternative accomodation anyway, and for that reason he's unlikely to fund anywhere much better than a Travelodge or Premier Inn type place.

OP posts:
Less · 16/07/2012 12:27

Ah you see and that's where my unease comes from. Of course he's not under any obligation to put her up anywhere, but he's managed feel that he's "done a good thing" by putting her up somewhere you have previously said he wouldn't contend with for himself. Nice, but not that nice iyswim

I don't however think for a minute that that makes him liable to cheat Smile

Tokamak · 16/07/2012 12:42

but he's managed feel that he's "done a good thing"

God I love the Relationships board.

Even Jesus would get aq hard time, being a man and all.

Shh2012 · 16/07/2012 13:13

Loss I don't think you need to feel any unease. I did say way back that he tries to be a good (ie reasonable) landlord in order to keep the good tenants. They can be hard to find. Just as can good landlords. He's certainly not in it to be 'nice' to people, he's in it to keep the rent flowing in from those who look after their homes and pay on time. If he treats the tenants in a reasonable way, it's for his own benefit. Quite simple.

OP posts:
Shh2012 · 16/07/2012 13:15

On that note I think the thread has come to its end. My OP's been answered so it doesn't serve any of us to continue, especially now that we've gone very off topic.

OP posts:
MyinnergoddessisatLidl · 16/07/2012 16:53

just to say on the final post - if I had the option of a hotel stay, breakfast included and someone else making the beds and cleaning the toilet, I would go for it in a heart beat!

For a few days it'd feel like a little minibreak....

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