Please help me re-engage

[uselesslife]

I need some motivation
I feel shit
I look like shit, I really need to lose weight
I try to diet, but get shaky and weak.
I have a knee injury
I've been to the doctors, had blood tests
But it's more of an emotional state
I'm not depressed, anxious sometimes, but not depressed

I am very unhappy with DH, I think we are not going to survive
It hurts that I don't feel any affection for him any more, tbh I loathe him most of the time. I feel anxious when he is due home, and wonder what the hell is going to happen now, what his mood is going to be like
It's his fault and he admits this. we can't separate right now, no-one has anywhere to go. He begs me not to leave him

My DS is beautiful, and my life, but is so active and I can't cope with him 100% and feel guilty about him going to nursery. I worry constantly that I am not doing enough for him.

Everything is just too much
I cannot cope

I am aware that a lot of this is hormonal, I feel like this every month, but it doesn't make it any less real
Doctor done hormone tests too, all fine

I hate my life
I never expected it to be like this

From the outside, it looks pretty good, but I am so miserable

So is £7K = £700 or £7000. I'm confused. I thing it is £7000 which seems a lot for a tax bill for 6 months work but yea I have no clue how much you made. Anyway I always thought they would send you a bill after you complete your tax return, how does it work anyway? Hope you are getting help and will find a solution for your relationship soon, I'm kind of in the same boat

I'm sorry complexo, but I think this is not helping the OP at the moment.

OP, have you been able to get an appointment with another GP? Keep trying, we are here to keep you going and cheer you on.....

I'm so sorry. I wonder, why do you say you're not depressed? IME one of the biggest signs of depression is feeling unable to cope with everyday tasks, like you say, simple phone calls, errands.

I think it's a really good idea to see a GP, maybe anti-depressants would help stabilise things a bit.

And longer-term, start figuring out ways to end your marriage. That's probably the biggest thing you could do to help. Have you checked out entitledto, to see what you could get in benefits if you left? If it's the practical things that are keeping you there, maybe it wouldn't be as bad as you think.

If you say so - SoSad007 - whatever

If you say so - SoSad007 - whatever

tax is corporation tax, not self assessment, I really don't know how it works, just what the accountant is telling me
I have asked him to see about instalments, that might take the pressure off

Bohemian- I have talked to the GP about depression, we both thought that I wasn't, it was more of an anxiety. We disussed it, she didn't try to dissuade me from AD's. The crying and not coping only happens for about 4 days a month, hence sending me for hormone tests. But I think now it is becoming more of a problem, so I do need to re-discuss depression. But she was so helpful and I felt that she knew me and understood. Now I have to explain it all again

I looked at that entitledto. I don't know the first thing about income support/tax credits.

If I put in all my details as if I was single with no income, then it is quite favourable
But surely that doesn't include anything DH would contribute
It all comes down to him

I think your next step is to post about your tax problems and what money you might be entitled to if you and your DH decided to seperate,in the money matters section on MN.I think they would have more of an idea about that part of it all on there.
Then go from there,or perhaps carry on posting on here on the relationships board as well.
I think everything that you have going on,needs to be dealt with in steps.

Hi there, others are much more emotionally helpful than I am but a couple of practical things.

Re the getting shaky when you try to diet. It is possible that you have hypoglaecemia - I think I have it, not something that doctors tend to diagnose as its to do with blood sugars, but basically you need to cut out as much sugar and refined carb as possible. If you are dieting i.e. reducing calories but not looking at your overall sugar intake thats why you will be feeling shaky.

Secondly on the St Johns Wort. I find it brilliant for mild depression however it reacts against the pill and makes it less effective as a contraceptive - I think getting pregnant would be the last thing you want to happen right now so I thought I would let you know.