The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Starting the Summer Filled With Luscious Mocktails.

[Mouseface]

Hello, I'm Mouse and I used to drink far too much. Too much vodka to be exact, then too much wine, then too much cider....... you can imagine how it went.

This Bus is full of people like me, and people like you actually. Sober people, drinkers, a few not surers, and those who are simply 'somewhere'.

The one thing that we have in common is that we can/do/did/will abuse alcohol.

Some for a number of years, some months, some for their entire adult (and before) lives.

The support here is for everyone. Those in AA, those who are taking medication to help, those going it alone, those with the support of others. We're all here for the same reason.

Why not come and say hello? We are all so very different in our every day lives but we all have a common theme.....

And, for those who want to see where all of this began 2 years ago, HERE IS a link to all of the past Bus rides.

Go Silver what's your plan?

very proud of dd2 - told me today she was accosted by a homeless guy when in Edinburgh last week at rehearsals. Despite only having a few pounds she told him she wouldn't give him money but would buy him a bacon roll. She did so and gave it to him and he siad" It's people like you that give me the strength to keep on living."

aww ma thats so sweet

Did you manage to sew sequins onto your sou'wester?

Forgot to say Ma your DD is absolutely beautiful and I also like the second shot more as it shows her face.

Im ok I've been drinking a lot. Dp moved out this week. It hurts really bad. He's at a black tie ball tonight I'm at home with a one year old and a bottle of wine for company. Sorry I cant read and reply in detail addiction is a selfish disorder

Hi Skippy the same thing happened to me 5 years ago (DH moved out and I was drinking an awful lot). I do feel for you. Just wanted to say you're amongst people who understand and try not to get too hammered for the sake of your little one. Hard I know, I remember the mornings where I fell down the stairs because I was so hungover and had to deal with a small child and a head that was killing me. The days were long and tortuous, drink only made it worse.

Talk to us, and tell us about the hurting and know you're not alone. Why not go to bed now and try and get some sleep and check in again tomorrow. x

Just signing in with a name change (was anniea---hole)

Had to go a do,where people were drinking today.They are annoying especially when you can smell their booze soaked breath spouting off drunken shit.

Sober here,think I'm 7 months now.

if you asked me whether I could remain sober for 2 days last year,I would of lied and said 'sure' while panicking about getting my vino in the night.

Wherever your journey is,keep with it and PLEASE ask for help medically if you cannot stay stopped.

There is a sober life out there and it's in you.

I'm blathering on ,half knackered. Just keep on resisting,cutting back,stop beating on yourself-you are ALL wonderful souls (and yes this all applies to you too Lurkers ;-)

Have a great weekend guys,strength and calm and resistance xxx

An alcohol free Friday night! By choice!! And I enjoyed it!!!

incidentally, for Joey and others who were talking about trouble getting to sleep - I have been falling asleep so so much quicker and easier since doing this low carb thing. Last night no painkillers and I didn't even need my ipad on - I was asleep within ten mins of putting out my light. That's unheard of for me so I can only think that it's the no carbs plus no booze.

Happy days Babes! Xxx

That's great Mia, are you having a drink tonight? I'm being bad I know, but I've started wondering if I can ever achieve controlled drinking. I know you drink a bit now Mouse and some others, how does it work for you? Or am I deluded and just falling into the same trap again. Never been this sober for so long though. Glad you changed your username Annie you are so not an a...hole.

Well off to collect Alfie in a bit - excited or what! And have "met" a local man online with 11 year old DD, dog and who can spell! (also great body, shallow old me :). Who knows, maybe we'll meet for a dog walk sometime.

Hope you have a great post-Wedding day Isinde, hangover free! x

soba the spelling is definitely the most important bit. Nab him at once!
Yet more cold and rain here - DS summer fayre is going to be jolly. will this feckin rain ever stop????????????

Haha I thought that said 'a dog who can spell' and I was very impressed for a moment

I helped at a school fete yesterday and guess what they put me down for? The bottle stall ! But it was fine. I had an interesting time 'people watching' those who kept coming back time and and time again, trying to win bottles of wine . For some of them so desparate to win it would have been cheaper to just go out and buy one but who knows what they were thinking? Maybe they are trying to kid themselves, or their families. Or maybe they were just very supportive of the school?

Aaaanyhooo, Isinde many, many congratulations to you both, you seem to be in a really good place right now, ready to embrace and enjoy a wonderful future and all the exciting ups and downs of life together.

I often think the same about me and Hose. We're a good fit. We sometimes have very different approaches but we understand each other and over the years we have been flexible enough to mould closer rather than drifting apart.

JWN how is your dad doing? And how is your mum coping? What a lot for you to deal with right now, I do hope you are managing to take some time for yourself. I wonder how different your life would be today if you hadn't decided to do something about your drinking when you did.

Even if you dd was getting married, would she even have wanted you there, knowing that you would probably drink too much and embarrass her? You would most likely have turned to drink in response to your dad's illness too. I remember my mum got absolutely plastered when her father became very ill and she was horrible to me and my family.

Just look at you now . How far you have come and what a fabulous inspiration to all of us. Your dd loves you and wants you in her life. You have turned everything around. When is the big day, and are you anywhere near ready? Sending you calm and positive vibes x

Ma we are all in agreement, your dd is beautiful, keep us updated won't you, just so that we can say we 'knew' her when x

Joey I think you have experienced The Boing. Great isn't it

faire better take her pic down now - there is only so much fishing for compliments I can do really.....but thank you all for your nice comments.

Sobasoma of course it is your choice re: controlled drinking, but in my experience it can be controlled for a while, but soon heads towards out of control again.
I have been pregnant twice - not a drop for 9 months; feeding - 'controlled' drinking (1-2 drinks every couple of days); weaned - back to binge drinking on the nights that DH was around to do the childcare .

As they got older and needed less nightime care, guess what? I drank more, on most nights.

Over the last 18 years I have stopped drinking on and off, for weeks at a time, sometimes as long as 10 weeks, but each time I started again, I was back to 1-2 bottles a night within a couple of weeks.

My only hope now is to not drink at all, today, tomorrow, every day, ODAAT.

By all means try it for yourself, but I would love it if you could benefit from my hard won experience.

Hey you, my Antabuse buddy. You know why controlled drinking isn't the answer for you, or me either, come to that. We were both out of control, and both pretty desperate. Hence the Antabuse. I wobbled and you helped and supported me. You're wobbling now.

The idea of controlled drinking is so seductive, I know. Even now there isn't a day that goes past without my thinking wistfully that a glass, just one glass, might be nice. But it takes months if not years to change those habits we had. Those habits where a glass turned into a bottle and a bottle turned into two. Every day.

Just focus on one day at a time, matey.

Afternoon, tis me, Mouse

Have a quick peek through but need to go out so will read back later

IsinDe - my darling friend. I hope with all of my heart that today, the day that you take your wonderful DP into your arms, your life, your soul in he presence of your dearest friends and okayish family, the sun shines down on you and warms the very deepest part of your heart.

Your joining, your partnership, you union, is the most important thing today. Your darling daughters will be there to witness their wonderful mummy's become one in an official capacity, all the while knowing that the love, respect and honour was already the case.

I love what DP sent you. She loves you warts and all and ime, a love as deep as that doesn't come along very often. So take it with both hands, hold her love in your heart and never, ever let it go.

I'm sorry for being a soppy old mouse but I know that you are loved, and I hope that you'll be happy, today, tomorrow and always xxxx

Controlled drinking is very hard to achieve, as I am finding at the moment. I am drinking less, but still just about every night. I have noticed that the craving has reduced, through.

Soma I would seriously reconsider controlled drinking for the reasons that Hopefully has mentioned.

faire I always used to have a go at the adult tombola on the school 'fayre'. (and I didn't this year, so proud of me!)

I think its a way of kidding yourself that you're not buying alcohol, it's just luck that you won, and didn't end up with the men's aftershave...

soma

am chanting 'Al-fie! Al-fie! Alfie's coming home!' You're so lucky to have a brand-new dog and he will love you forever

Soma the idea that a drink would be wonderful gets so blown out of proportion. It's not wonderful, it's just a drink. The only thing that makes it any different to a nice cup of tea is that, if you have enough of it, it makes you drunk. It also makes you behave stupidly and feel horrendous the next day.

Don't make it into something special, something precious, something worth having. It ain't. It's not all that, you are not missing anything.

Now, if it's the drunk feeling you're missing, then try saying that instead.

"I really wish I could have a couple of drinks now and again" . . . translates more honestly into "I really wish I could get drunk now and again".

Well, no you don't. Being drunk is horrible. That's why you stopped drinking in the first place.

Try this - deprive yourself of something that you really like, chocolate or cheese or coffee, or whatever. Don't have any at all for a month until you really, crave it, then have some. It won't be that special. You will have built it up in your mind purely because you can't have it.

Hope some of this makes sense to you

Bproud, Faire, Hopefully thank you for your advice - it's so true, I never just want one or two I love getting drunk and that ain't going to change is it!

Joey Alfie is curled up next to me, he's in heaven. He's been a dream today apart from one BIG problem. He barked at the cat at the first introduction, we did another one and they were OK with eachother (just sort of checking eachother out) but now she's got the terrors and won't come downstairs! I've locked the cat-flap because I'm terrified of her running away and she has her own safe room upstairs with bed, litter tray and food. I do hope they learn to get on :(

Anyway, the furthest thing from my mind tonight is a drink, all I want to do is sleep! Nite nite babes x

Bproud, Faire, Hopefully thank you for your advice - it's so true, I never just want one or two I love getting drunk and that ain't going to change is it!

Joey Alfie is curled up next to me, he's in heaven. He's been a dream today apart from one BIG problem. He barked at the cat at the first introduction, we did another one and they were OK with eachother (just sort of checking eachother out) but now she's got the terrors and won't come downstairs! I've locked the cat-flap because I'm terrified of her running away and she has her own safe room upstairs with bed, litter tray and food. I do hope they learn to get on :(

Anyway, the furthest thing from my mind tonight is a drink, all I want to do is sleep! Nite nite babes x

Soma I did drink tonight; I had two glasses of red. It tasted nice but that was it, really. I didn't want any more after that and all it seemed to do was make me sleepy! It might be because I came in from my day out really hungry, and whereas before that would have meant I really really wanted a glass of white and headed straight for the fridge, this time it was food I wanted! So I had a little snack and then poured the red while I was cooking dinner. It really wasn't all that - I was already feeling really good because I enjoyed the first aid course enormously, and if anything the wine dulled that, tbh.

Soma my lovely I think controlled drinking is a really dangerous path for you at the moment, because you weren't really a few and then a few more glasses every night girl, you were an irregular binger, weren't you? If you make drinking an option in your mind again, do you think there's the danger that when you're feeling low/angry/sad/shit whatever (as we all do sometimes) that you will seek that oblivion again? I don't know whether having 'a glass with supper' sometimes is worth risking opening up that option (of getting hammered) in your subconscious again. You've come so so far, and made such profound changes to your life and also, crucially, that of your DD, that I don't think a glass of wine here and there is worth risking all that for.

The man and his dog sound very promising! faire I also read it as the dog being able to spell. You meet so many people when you have a dog, it's like joining a fellowship! Endless conversations about their dog, your dog, all dogs and everything else under the sun!

Al-fie Al-fie Al-fie!!!

Hope everyone else's day has been good and you've made the most of the weather. I was shut up in a stuffy room all day, but I don't mind.

Cross posted with you soma. So glad he's here and settling in. Early days with Maddy so hopefully she'll come round. Give her loads and loads of one on one love! xx

Isn't it fabulous to go to bed relaxed and sober on a Saturday night. Night nite all.

another migraine, and strangely started at exactly the same time as last Saturday... don't know if that means I had too much coffee. Sigh, no alcohol, no coffee... all my little treats are being taken away

soma I'm so glad to hear that Alfie has settled. If the cat goes in another room, could you let Alfie in her room so that he can get used to her smell... I've heard this works with gerbils...

mia brilliant that you're enjoying your first-aid course & it sounds like a great incentive to staying sober

G'night babes