The Brave Babes Battle Bus - On Their Way To Giving Up The Booze For Lent (or just for today)

[Mouseface]

Hello, I'm Mouse

Welcome to the Brave Babes Bus where you'll find a mix of drinker, non drinkers, those who has been sober for a long time, and those who are getting there One Day At A Time.

Come and say hi....... we won't bite

And if you want to know how this all got started, HERE is a link to the previous threads.

Morning everyone

I have been here, just buried under a pile of home made Easter cards, Easter bonnets and various other end of term paraphenalia .

Ma my lovely girlfriend spyware, what on earth?, when does Dh think you get the time to do anything like that!!? I hope you feel ok this morning, no advice, as I know you have things in place, and plans, and I also completely understand why you can't act straight away. Sending you a big hug my matey xxx.

Nothing to drink for me, since my drop off the end of the bus last week, which really is the only way to go for me, unless I'm out in the evening (once in a blue moon!), weirdly, when I can have just one. I do know that that's the "rigid, drink think" though, which other people just don't do, and I can't do that at home. I did have a strong craving for a glass of wine last night at abot 6pm, but distracted myself, and anyway it was a school night, so I knew I couldn't do it. I think I will find it more difficult in the holidays.

Hello to all lovely new Babes, this bus is a great place to be. I'm sorry I missed you arriving, I'm usually around a bit more than I have been this week.

Much love to all Babes
Speak later
xxxx

P.s Mouse Sending you a big hug, hope things are ok. xxxx

oh Ma ((( )))

keep sober, make your plans. you are right - you need a clear head right now.

I wish I could say something lovely and useful but I have coffee and will hold your hand whilst you need.

xx

ps - Day 5 here. I can't believe it myself. I don't understand why its so 'easy' this time compared to previous times.

MsGee maybe it's the 'not-dithering' easiness that I find works for me. It's simply because you mean it and you know you mean it? Hard to describe in print! But yay, go you, well done .

Thurso I have found holidays more difficult in the past too. Especially the first few days. This time I have a bit of spring cleaning planned for the early evenings, just to keep me busy and make me tired enough to just fancy a cuppa. Hopefully I will catch up on those jobs I have been putting off for ages. Have you got any plans to see the dcs?

Ma we are all here for you ((hugs)). Of course you must do whatever feels right for you right now. Hopefully, making plans will help you feel more in control and strong enough to deal with each day as it comes. There is enough wisdom, experience and support just here on this bus to make you feel you have an army at your disposal if you need it x. The Brave Babes SWAT team strikes again .

Oooh another Anais Nin quote: Life is a process of becoming, a combination of states we have to go through. Where people fail is that they wish to elect a state and remain in it. This is a kind of death.

I like that idea that we are always working towards 'becoming'. That we get to choose who we become. There are a lot of changes between a newborn and elderly person, physically, mentally, emotional, spiritually. We are never quite the same person we were yesterday. Makes the idea of future interesting and exciting, rather than dull or frightening .

Yes, why elect a state and remain in it? That's no fun at all. I think the sunshine is getting to me venus, I am becoming intoxicated with it .

I'll go now . . .

faire that is a good quote. resonates with me.
Thanks to the SWAT Team - you guys rock.

Thurso Faire, totally get the school holidays thing. The next 2 weeks will be interesting times indeed. Previously it's always been "ok another stressful with day with the kids home but at least there's a bottle in the fridge to make it all better".
Think my strategy will have to be, eat early & get productive in the evenings. I also feel a big burst of spring cleaning coming on!
Morning to everyone else on today's bus ride

Ma - am so pleased that you have fantastic support from your babes here.

I had a vile day yesterday. Just awful. By 5pm I was thinking, cor I would like wine tonight actually, its been a rotten day.

Then I had dd's Parents Evening and her teachers were so nice about her and so overwhelmingly positive about everything about her that dh and I were a little bit choked up ... and I thought as I left school, cor I would really love some wine now to celebrate!

How crazy??

Going out to 2 ... count em ... 2 ... events in pubs/wine bars tonight. Am designated driver so v popular .

Onwards and upwards all babes.

Good luck for tonight Bibbity, it sounds like you've got good strategies for dealing with the 'winetime' thoughts.

Long-time lurker and admirer of all you babes old and new. Time to come out I reckon as I've been binge-drinking for nearly 40 years (I'm in my mid 50s and started as a teenager).

I drink once or twice a week, normally alone, and can't have one or two. Usually it's a bottle of wine and sometimes more. I drink because I love the feeling booze gives me - a real buzz which I just have to keep going. I've tried cutting down/stopping more times than I care to count. The hardest thing is coping with cravings and getting through them. Been to AA/the GP/counsellors and tried medication. But nothing has stopped me returning to bingeing.

Yesterday after I finished work at 2pm, I marched straight into the supermarket and bought a bottle of wine, got home and opened it, finished it off and then went to the pub on the corner for a large glass of sauvignon as I wanted more. But I made sure I was home for DD (aged 12) when she got home from school, cooked her a meal and then passed out on the bed for a couple of hours. Shitty behaviour don't you think?

I'm sick of myself and the inability to accept that I can't control this.

Welcome to the bus Jane. Have you got a plan?

jane it sounds as if you can see what you're doing now isn't working. Are you trying to control your drinking? What strategies have you tried? What frightens you about not drinking today?

snap, Bibbity!

boing!!! welcome jane!!

nice day here, ive been getting quotes for wedding transport dear lord! the prices are unbelievable, well, actually they arent, you only have to use the 'wedding' word and everything shoots through the roof, price wise so, i need 2 old charabancs like our gerald, for 2 hours to move 100 people 12 miles, cheapest quote? £1500 fucking quid!

may I join? i have read lots of your posts and see myself in a lot of them especially jane

all welcome jammy!

Thank you, I have a battle with drink constantly and loose! I have a lovely dh, two lovely dds a good job so why do i feel the need to drink, I have "drinking out of control stop binge drinking" cd in my bag and have never listened to it, I hide wine in a wellie so it doesnt look like ive drunk as much as i have, lost cause i think!!!

no one is a lost cause! you just need to want to change badly enough!

what do you want to do? stop altogether or learn to control it? you have to decide which is best for you, tbh, i advocate the stopping altogether because i think if you could control then you wouldnt be here!

i have to go out now but im sure a babe will be here in a minute!

Good Evening Babes, tis me, Mouse

I'm so sorry that I've not been around as much, real life is a massive PITA just now. Too much to go into without boring you all, but let's just say that I am almost at breaking point and for me to say that is a bad thing, I normally keep it hidden behind a massive smile.

I got the all clear from my Neurologist this morning which is great news and he has discharged me.

I'm waiting for a new car, with my DLA (disability living allowance) I've managed to get a mode of transport that I don't to rely on others for and it's automatic so will be easier for me to drive.

I'm in a lot of pain at the moment, not really able to rest and Nemo is having a very active phase so requires my undivided even more so.

He's getting heavier so I'm struggling to lift him. His physio has ordered a Major buggy so hopefully, we'll get that soon. My meds are messing me up too, I keep jumping up suddenly, when I'm awake as well as asleep. DH is scared shitless when I do it because f the height I manage to reach!

I will read back properly but Faire - I saw your post about maybe not needing this Bus any more. The thing is, the Bus needs YOU. I need you, we all need you to post here.

Your posts are really helpful to read because you're honest about your drinking, and you always try to help others which is what this Bus is all about, SUPPORT. I've not seen your recent posts but picked up on that one. I hope that you stay, xx

Ma - you know how a feel about DH. He is emotionally abusive towards you. Whilst I appreciate the fact that I don't 'know' him, I do know how he makes you feel; like shite! I wish I could scoop you up with everything you own want or need from the house and just get you out of there

Off to read back Stay Strong Battle Bus Babes

mouse when I read you posts I feel like a fraud, sorry,

No such thing as a lost cause. People have lost family, jobs, homes and relationships through drink, stopped drinking and earned it all back again. As JWN says you just have to want to change.

Are you sick and tired of feeling sick and tired?

PS - Hello to the new Babes

Yes I am sick and tired of feeling crap on a morning, people think I am witty and funny when I have had a drink,im quite i havent, im fat red cheeks like an old man!

welcome jammy and welcome jane

No need to feel like a fraud, drinking isn't the perogative of those with the most difficult lives. What drinking does do it steal our self-esteem and self-worth, so that sometimes we don't even feel worthy of being on an anonymous thread for people with a drink problem.

Whatever you post, however down and hopeless things feel, someone on here will have been there - maybe several times, maybe as recently as yesterday, and usually someone will say just the thing you need to hear (even if sometimes you don't want to hear it).

Best thing is just post what you want, and how you're feeling - even if it is rambling and non-sensical. Better to get it out here than try and drown it quietly.