How do you feel about your mum if she is still around and how do you deal with the fact that she never protected you from it if you think she knew?
Do you have any meaningful relationship with her?
I am findingthis really hard. Never really got on with my mum, she is quite annoying at the best of times and generally only talk about herself. If we ever end up having a conversation about the past it is always tunred into how she is suffering rather than listening even when she has asked us to talk about it.
Ok I know it must be hard for her (she is still with my dad) and it must have been but she just doesnt seem to honestly care about anyone else.
I know she wants me and my sisters help and to have a relationship with us but how can we when she is like this? Even when someone else is ill or has a problem somehow iot affects her more than the actual person.
I feel I am talking to a wall when she asks us about things or our opinions.
I just find it so irritating and annoying.
My sister who was abused by my father for many years feels exactly the same.
When she told my mum about it later in her teens she stayed with dad in the hope he would change but he continued. She is still with him but having problems now and seems to think she can rely on us to help her.
I am fine supporting her if she needs it but I don't want to be her crutch. I dont feel she was ever there when we needed her so why should we be?