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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Feeling so irrationally angry at DP because of EVERYTHING he does

57 replies

IrritatedMary · 15/02/2012 22:42

We've just been to the cinema. I asked him to buy "cinema sweets" from asda as we normally do because it's cheaper. So later we get in the cinema and he pulls out two 4 packs of Daim bars and a BOX of maltesers. 2 of the Daim bars had already been eaten and when I pulled out another daim bar for myself and temporarily put it on my knee he took it and ate it. Apart from that, who the fuck sits there eating BARS in the cinema? It was ridiculous, far too much noise and faffing so I ended up saving them until after the film. I'm sat here thinking about it and I feel so, so angry. Everything he does annoys me.

*He told the doctor he had trouble "working" a normal asthma inhaler so the doctor gave him a children's "disk" inhaler. How can anyone NOT work a fucking inhaler?? Apparantly most children don't need these type and they're normally used by children with learning difficulties.

*He eats curry with a spoon.

*In bed he things he looks at me and grins, mouth open and tongue wagging from side to side - is this supposed to be sexy? because it makes me feel ill.

*He nags and nags and nags for sex and when I give in eventually so I can sleep he can't get it up anyway.

*Gaslighting. I start to turn the car left and he says "you're better off going left here." I say "err I am!" and he says "yes because I just pointed it out to you". No, I'd already started turning!! "but you wouldn't have if I hadn't told you the way"

I'm sat here seething. He makes me cross. Without even trying. He's embarrassing. I'm just ranting.

What I'm trying to ask is has anyone else ever suddenly started to get intensly irritated by their partners for no "solid" reason?

OP posts:
Sparks1 · 15/02/2012 22:48

Rant all you want. You're a pair of twats and deserve each other.

BertieBotts · 15/02/2012 22:50

Well, gaslighting and pressure for sex are decent reasons. So if that's part of a bigger picture, it's possible you're just losing the love and respect you once had for him. The other stuff is petty, but when you're not blinded by love for someone their annoying habits can seem, well, even more annoying.

AngryFeet · 15/02/2012 22:51

Break up. You obviously despise him. It is normal to get a bit annoyed with peoples habits and funny ways but you are just being a cow. I'm sure you do things that annoy him too.

BertieBotts · 15/02/2012 22:52

I want a Dime bar now :(

NatashaBee · 15/02/2012 22:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Elefriend · 15/02/2012 22:55

Thats not very nice Sparks1, do you know this couple, if not I hardly think your reply is going to help

Im afraid I dont have any advice to you IrritatedMary, I think its natural for partners to annoy each other at times but Im not sure if yours has gone one step further, is it a blip or have you felt like this for a while?

Hopefully someone will be along with some advice soon

LittleHouseofCamelias · 15/02/2012 22:58

Yes

It was the end of my marriage.

Does his breathing annoy you? If so you should probably end the relationship! He can't help it.

AbbyAbsinthe · 15/02/2012 23:01

Oh my god! I've taken SANDWICHES into the cinema before now!

And lots of people eat curry with a spoon.

As for the rest of it... you're just finding things to justify that he gets on your fucking nerves. That won't ever go away - from now on, he is always going to get on your fucking nerves. So get rid!

AbbyAbsinthe · 15/02/2012 23:02

Yes. Breathing. And the way he eats crisps. And apples. And certain facial expressions, and mannerisms. Seriously. To my mind, this is The End.

Sparks1 · 15/02/2012 23:05

Thats not very nice Sparks1, do you know this couple, if not I hardly think your reply is going to help

You're right. Completely unhelpful comment.

kodachrome · 15/02/2012 23:07

Why are you with him?

ElusiveCamel · 15/02/2012 23:58

Getting murderously annoyed by the way they eat = The End of every relationship I've ever been in.

solidgoldbrass · 16/02/2012 02:04

The pestering for sex is a good enough reason to dump him. Actually, not wanting to be in a relationship any more is all the reason you need to dump the person. Noone owes anyone a relationship. Best of luck getting rid.

izzyizin · 16/02/2012 04:49

When it gets to a point where you have no respect and no liking for a significant other and they irritate the shit out of you , any relationship you once enjoyed is over. End of.

Now it's time to let him go and hope that he finds someone who doesn't judge him as harshly as you have done - and that karma won't bite you on the bum one day.

To this end I do hope you haven't acquired some of his more annoying habits by the process of osmosis as, outside of the canine world, I can't imagine that many lovers would be gagging for it if you signified your intent by wagging your tongue from side to side - and especially not in company Grin

LovesBeingWearingSkinnyJeans · 16/02/2012 05:26

You don't need a reason that is good enough for anyone except you.

BayPolar · 16/02/2012 06:56

Does he bite his cutlery when he eats? This is a deal breaker for me and I'm not kidding.
He sounds like a twat. But he must always have been like that.
Again, yet another MN'er who married somebody without really thinking if he/she was the right person for them.
Folks in here do it all the time.
Not sure why, must be low self-esteem or needing a man to take care of them financially.

MsF1t · 16/02/2012 07:06

Another theme, BayPolar, I have noticed, is people who only post on threads in order to have a judgy pop at other people in order to underscore their own superiority. Probably low self esteem or not having a man at all.

BayPolar · 16/02/2012 07:07

Lots of posters have 'had a pop' at this one. I was just following the crowd. And yes, you are right, I have low self-esteem and nobody loves me. Sigh.

ledkr · 16/02/2012 07:13

I don think he sounds like a twat,i thinbk he is just being normal and you dont fancy or love him anymore,end it with him now poor bloke.

MsF1t · 16/02/2012 07:18

BayPolar- yes, they have. And my comments are as much for them and their ilk- but I have yet to see a post from you which is not about point-scoring from someone and going on about how superior you and the choices you have made in life are. It's a little grating, and I've been up since 4 am so my patience is a little thin today- and can't be arsed being diplomatic.

BayPolar · 16/02/2012 07:19

I've made plenty of posts where I have shown empathy and support. Plenty. You just choose to see the 'point-scoring' ones because you don't like me.
That's fine by me.
I don't like you either.

fluffygal · 16/02/2012 07:35

People are being harsh, you came on here to rant, better that then pointing it all out to OH. I don't think you can help it when you become irrationally irritated by someone, but in my experience, like others, it does signify the end when this happens.

MsF1t · 16/02/2012 07:49

Oh, sob.

I shall look out for these empathic, helpful posts of yours BayPolar. For what it's worth, we don't actually know each other- possibly a good thing. But if I have misjudged you then I will be glad to be proved wrong, because being right about you would be a little depressing. Hey, ho.

sonicrainboom · 16/02/2012 08:00

Well IrritatedMary, you two really should break up. What's the point of being together with someone if you get annoyed by every single thing he does?

BayPolar · 16/02/2012 08:05

Quite a good thing. You sound as if you have some chips on your shoulder.