Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

My relationship is crap isn't it????

52 replies

needsomelovin · 08/02/2012 19:10

Right I'm just going to let it all out...I need to vent. I've only been with him 5 months and I feel like this already!!!! He has good points of course he does, but I'm not going mention those, just the bad things!

A few months into our relationship I discovered he was flirting with other women on facebook, he went over the line by asking one woman for a dirty picture and giving her his number. I was devestated finished it but he talked me into going back, said it would never happen again and he just wanted to make me happy. Since then we have had numerous arguments, over nothing really, he really shouts at me, is aggressive and just can't talk calmly, he is always snappy, and very rarely says anything nice. He looks at other women (what man doesn't) but makes me feel everyone else is better than me. He complains I don't answer the phone to him sounding pleased to hear from him, I don't tell him I love him even though I do every day nearly. We have been out twice on our own since we met and that was the 1st few dates since then we just stay in and watch tv, he gets snappy and I feel like an old married couple. Yet as soon as a bloke friend phones to go for a beer he's well up for it, doesn't make me feel good really.

Our sex life has always been good, but he's even started to be snappy during sex that I'm not doing something right, or not naughty enough etc, but thats because he has made me feel uncomfortable around him now. I'm loosing confidence. I've cooled off a bit and as soon as he realises something is wrong, he declares his undying love for me, wants to make it work etc. But I've had enough, its time to end it isn't it???!!!!

OP posts:
Sparks1 · 08/02/2012 19:14

Um, yes.

You say he has good points. Really!?

corlan · 08/02/2012 19:17

Run needsomelovin! Run like the wind!!!!!!!!

(Just be glad you realised all this after 5 moths and not 5 years )

BayPolar · 08/02/2012 19:19

Case closed. I hope.
What a dick.

MyCatHasStaff · 08/02/2012 19:19

Run for the hills and don't look back.

tribpot · 08/02/2012 19:21

Run, run as fast as you can. He sounds utterly, utterly dreadful.

SquishyCinnamonSwirls · 08/02/2012 19:21

Certainly doesn't sound good!
5 months? Run away, fast.

anonacfr · 08/02/2012 19:22

So after 5 months you've already split up once- he yells at you and tells you off all the time including during sex because you're not naughty enough (WTAF?????? If my OH said that to me during sex, I'd tell him to get naughty in the spare room with his fist)- he looks at other women (and no, not all men do that's complete bollocks) and flirts with them online.

And you have to be pleased to hear from him why exactly?

The man is a prick who hates women. He has no respect for you at all.

kerala · 08/02/2012 19:23

Errr yes.

pinkyredrose · 08/02/2012 19:25

He's treating you as though he doesn't like you that much. It sounds as though he just wants someone/anyone to live up to his idea of what a partner should be.

I would definatly get rid, he doesn't seem to have much respect for you.

TooEasilyTempted · 08/02/2012 19:27

Yes, your relationship is crap.

But be thankful you've realised this after only five months, and not five years.

Don't even waste another five minutes on him, please!

tribpot · 08/02/2012 19:28

And btw, in relation to your thread title - this isn't a relationship. Really. It sounds more like a prison sentence!

alarkaspree · 08/02/2012 19:32

You love him? Really?? Why?

Please end it, this just sounds ghastly.

tallwivglasses · 08/02/2012 19:37

He's grooming you. Think of him as a tattooist. He's etching the word 'WELCOME' into your soul in preparation for trampling all over you.

What worries me is you've put up with this for 5 whole months.

Just out of interest, what do your friends think of him?

needsomelovin · 08/02/2012 19:39

I know your all right. I just can't believe he's turned out like this, had such high hopes at the beginning, he said he would treat me like I should be treated......wtf!!!!! Can't believe I got it so wrong! :-(

OP posts:
Memoo · 08/02/2012 19:40

Wow! Seriously? You put up with this shit after just 5 months together. Why haven't you dumped him before now?

Memoo · 08/02/2012 19:41

Stop being such a mug and DUMP HIM

needsomelovin · 08/02/2012 19:42

To everyone else, he comes across as a friendly, do anything for anyone type bloke...infact I met him through friends, they can't believe what he is actually like in a relationsip. I know though now why he has never been married at 42!!!!!

OP posts:
MumPotNoodle · 08/02/2012 19:43

I agree that he is grooming you. He treats you badly, you dump him, you take him back, he behaves for a while and then back to square one.

Dump him, he will only bring you misery, oh hang on, he is already doing that. Do not fall for any "but it's valentines next week" type crap, he is not your future.

tallwivglasses · 08/02/2012 19:45

He conned you. He made out he was a decent bloke. You wanted to believe that. Now you've sussed him. Bin him.

tethersend · 08/02/2012 19:56

Don't run, I'm calling you a taxi. It's faster.

ICanTuckMyBoobsInMyPockets · 08/02/2012 20:00

Grin at tethersend

Now ladies and gentlemen, it's time for my very first....... Leave the bastard!

That felt good. He sounds like an almighty prick. If you were my friend I'd tell you to dump him, and I'd expect you to do the same for me.

nalubeadsgirl · 08/02/2012 20:02

GET RID!!!! I went out with this man (well..not your man but he could have been his twin!!)....He wore me down until I believed I was not worthy of anything better. I wasted 7 months of my life. Please please PLEASE do not waste the pretty. GET OUT NOW!!!! (and read that book.."He's just not that into you'...that will help you get the hell out of there FAST!) xx

nalubeadsgirl · 08/02/2012 20:03

(oh and defo get rid before Valentines..why the hell would you want to have to buy him even a card!!!!) You should always love yourself first..you are worth so much more.

oldqueenie · 08/02/2012 20:03

bloody hell. 5 months you've wasted and will never get back. Why? Why would you put up with this shit? bloody hell.

tentative123 · 08/02/2012 20:03

My husband doesn't look at other women. Its disrespectful.